Afilosofi, akatswiri a maganizo ndi akatswiri a maganizo amadzifunsa kuti n'chifukwa chiyani nthano ya ubale pakati pa amuna ndi akazi ndi nthano, osati zowona. Nthawi zina ife sitingathe kumvetsetsa zomwe tikufuna kuti tiwone mzanga wa mkazi kapena mwamuna yemwe ali pafupi ndi ife. Ndiye timamugwira iye pabwalo ndikumuyitana iye bwenzi lapamtima, ndiye mwachikondi timakonza usiku wosaiwalika wachikondi, womwe sichimulepheretsa kubwerera ku malo osungira.
Kuwonjezera apo - ubwenzi ndi kuthetsa kugonana kumakhala ndi mavuto ambiri. Choopsa ndi chakuti ife eni eni sitingathe kuyesa mosamalitsa zokhumba zathu ndi malingaliro athu. Zomwe nthawi zina timatenga monga chibwenzi zingakhale chikhumbo chokhutira maganizo kuti titenge chidwi cha amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. Choncho sizingatheke kuti tipeze mgwirizano pakati pa mabwenzi enieni, kukondana ndi kugonana. Ngakhale inu nokha mutsimikiza kuti pali ubwenzi pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi, ndiye kuti simungakhoze konse kutsimikizira chomwe "bwenzi" ili lachilendo amaganiza. Kotero, "abwenzi" amenewo ali pangozi yaikulu "kuti adziwe" ubwenzi wanu ulipobe.
Ngati mwakwatirana kapena mutha kulembetsa mgwirizano wanu mtsogolo, kukhalapo kwa bwenzi kapena chibwenzi kungaphatikize, mwakukhoza, kusowa kumvetsetsa, ndipo kungachititse nsanje mbali ya satetezi yanu yalamulo kapena yamtsogolo. Choncho, ngati mutasankha kuti mudziwe nokha mnzanu kapena bwenzi lanu muukwati wanu, chonde onetsetsani kuti pasamaperekedwe chidwi kwa mnzanu kapena chibwenzi kuposa mnzanuyo.
Pewani kuwona kuti ubwenzi sunafike poyandikana kwambiri, ndi kovuta kwambiri, ndipo kwa anthu ambiri sizingakhale zomveka nkomwe. Ndipo ngati inu kapena mnzanuyo mukumva kuti ubwenzi wanu uli pa chibwenzi, ndipo palibe mwayi wokhala mwamuna ndi mkazi, ndiye kuti inu kapena mnzanu mumakumana ndi zowawa zambiri. Choncho, muyenera kuganizira mozama musanayambe kucheza ndi amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. Ayi, izi sizikutanthauza kuti sangathe kuyambitsidwa, kuti athe kuthetsa nkhaniyi nkofunika kuti mutenge nawo mbali.
Kotero, ubale pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi mwina umakhala ubale wachilendo womwe ungakhalepo malinga ngati anthu amakondana wina ndi mzake, amafunika kuthandizana kapena kuthandizana. Koma ngati zochitikazo zilipamwamba kapena zikumveka mwanjira yoti palibe kuthekera kokondana kapena kukondana kwa wina wa iwo. M'tsogolomu, monga lamulo, zimakhala kuti wina analibe chikondi ndipo sanalandire kukana kuvomereza udindo wa "bwenzi."
Koma musawope ubwenzi. Mu moyo zonse zimachitika: ndipo pa gulu lirilonse lingaliro ndi lokha ndipo silidzabwerezedwa. Ndikofunika kuyamikira ubwenzi wanu, mulimonse mmene ziwonetsera. Musaope kugonana, monga gawo lomaliza la ubale wabwino, mwinamwake ichi ndi chiyambi cha ubale watsopano - ukwati. Kumbukirani kuti tikukumanga tsogolo lathu ndi maganizo athu ndi zochita zathu. Kotero tiyeni tiphunzire kulenga tsogolo lanu, ndipo osati kuliwononga ilo.