Amayi ambiri, monga amuna, safuna kuti alowe mu katatu, ngakhale kuti kusintha kwakukulu kumagwirizananso ndi machitidwe a kugonana, kulowetsa malingaliro pazinthu zofalitsa, malingaliro a kuchepa kwa ulamuliro wa banja. Chifukwa ndi malingaliro wamba amatiuza momwe tingakhalire.
Monga lamulo, chikondi chapatuko chimatha msanga, makamaka ngati amuna okwatira ali mu dongosolo lino. Amawonongeka kwenikweni pamzu wa zochitika zawo. Pali nthawi pamene katatu koteroko amakhalapo kwa nthawi yaitali, koma nthawi zambiri atakhala osakhulupirika ndi mmodzi mwa okwatirana, ziyeso zimawerengedwanso, kutembenuka kumabwera. Ndipo sizodziwika kuti pambuyo poti "kufotokozera makadi onse" munthuyo amakhalabe m'banja, nthawi zambiri banja limasokonezeka. Kugwa kwa katatu kondomeko kawirikawiri kumapezeka kuchokera pakanthawi kozindikira za chigololo ndi mkazi wovomerezeka. Nthawi zambiri pamene chiyanjano ndi mwamuna wokwatirana chingakhale kwa zaka zambiri.
Zimakhala kuti onse atatu ali chete, podziwa za kukhalapo kwa katatu. Kulimbana kwa munthu kumatha zaka zambiri. Pankhaniyi, ndi munthu yekha amene adzakhale wopambana pa nkhondoyi, pomwe akazi sangatenge mbali kapena wopambana. Triangle ya chikondi ikhoza kuwononga mmodzi yekha amene ali mmenemo mwa mmodzi. Ngati uku ndi ubale ndi mwamuna wokwatiwa, ndiye yekhayo amene amatha kutsogolera ndikudziwitsa zomwe zilipo - kapena kuthetsa mgwirizano mu mgwirizano katatu kapena "sob" mmenemo pang'ono. Mungaiwale bwanji mwamuna wanu wokondedwa, ngati ali wokwatira?
Ndikovuta kuima chiyanjano ndikuyesera kuiwala mwamuna wokondedwa wokwatiwa, ngati mkazi ali mu katatu kotere kwa nthawi yaitali. Ndipo sizimangogwirizana ndi okondedwa, komanso kudzidalira kwa amayi, chifukwa munthu ayenera "kugawa" ndi wotsutsana naye. Koma komabe tengani sitepe yovuta kuti mutuluke mu coil, ndiyotheka. Pali mfundo zambiri zomwe chiyanjano cha mkazi wokwatirana chimamangidwa. Ngati mwasankha kuiwala munthu amene mumawakonda komanso, ngati ali wokwatirana, muyenera kutsatira malangizo ena.
Chinthu choyambirira chimene chiyenera kuchitidwa - osati mkazi aliyense akhoza kukondana ndi mwamuna yemwe ali wokwatira. Kumbukirani zakale, gafuzani mkhalidwe wa makolo anu, ubale wawo wina ndi mzake. Mwina mawu oti "chikondi" amakupangitsani kuti musamvetsere kwenikweni, koma akugwirizanitsidwa ndi chinachake chimene chimawononga, chimabweretsa ululu. Kotero, inu mukuyesera kupeza munthu yemwe angakuthandizeni inu kubweretsa chithunzi cha ubale wanu muunyamata kunyumba kwa makolo. Chifukwa chake, mukuyang'ana mwachangu munthu "vuto". Kuchokera ku zizoloŵezi ndikofunikira ndipo ndikofunikira kuchotsa. Ndikofunika kuti tithetsere ndikugwirizanitsa ndi zolemetsa zakale. Ndiye muli ndi mwayi wosiya chiyanjano ndi mwamuna wokwatira. Ngati makolo anu akale sanakhale chitsanzo chanu chokhalira okondweretsa m'banja, ndipo ubale wawo unali wosokoneza, ndiye mwinamwake muyenera kuonana ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo yemwe angakuthandizeni kuthetsa vutoli.
Chinthu chotsatira kukumbukira amai omwe adafuna kuiwala mwamuna wawo wokondedwa, amene ali wokwatira, ndi funso lowonjezera kudzidalira kwawo. Kodi mudadziwa kuti ubale ndi mwamuna yemwe ali ndi mphete kudzanja lake lamanja ndi vuto lalikulu kwachabechabe? Sindinadziwe, koma ndinamva. Izi zimachitika kuti amayi omwe ali m'mabuku amenewa poyamba amakhala odzichepetsa. Mkazi amadziona kuti ndi wopusa, woipa, wosayenera kuti akhale wofunikira kwambiri komanso wapadera kwa osankhidwa ake. Mwamsanga pamene kusakhulupirira mwaumwini kumadzutsa, zambiri zimayesetsanso mavuto omwe amangowonjezera kusakhulupirira kumeneku. Izi zikutanthauza kuti, ngati mkazi sadzikonda yekha, amalemekeza, nthawi zambiri amakhala ndi amuna ovuta.
Amuna amakonda kudzikuza pa chiwerengero cha akazi omwe amanyengerera ndipo akhoza kukhala ndi chibwenzi ndi amayi amodzi kapena awiri, ndi zina zambiri, zomwe zimapangitsa kusakhutira kwanu. Amangopereka chitsimikiziro kuti agogomeze pa mwayi wapadera, popeza adakupulumutsani ku solokha ndi chidwi chanu ndi maganizo anu. Choncho, pambuyo pa ubale wotere ndi amuna okwatira, amayi amafunikira pulogalamu yonse kuti abwererenso ulemu ndi chikondi chawo paokha. Zikatero, yambani kulemba mndandanda wa mitundu iwiri ya anthu m'moyo wanu - anthu omwe mumawaona ngati abwenzi, okondedwa anu, omwe amakufikirani mtima wonse monga momwe amachitira, ndi omwe angatchedwe kuti akutsutsa maganizo. Amadyetsa mphamvu yanu akakukhumudwitsani ndikukuwonetsani molakwika, amasangalala ndi chisokonezo kapena zovuta zanu, kuyesera kuti muwone bwino. Yesetsani kusokoneza bwalo loyankhulana nthawi yoyamba (mwinamwake mwezi kapena awiri), mutatsiriza chiyanjano ndi mwamuna wokwatirana - izi zidzakuthandizani kubwezeretsa ulemu. Thandizo lanu lauzimu ndi mabwenzi apamtima adzakhala anthu ochokera mndandanda woyamba. Ndi omwe mumayika pandandanda wachiwiri, lekani kulankhulana konse, musawalole kuti awonekere m'moyo wanu.
Kwa mkazi, kugonana ndi mwamuna nthawi zonse ndi mayesero, ndipo ngati ali wokwatira, yesetsani kawiri. M'mabuku oterowo, mumatha kupeza chimwemwe ndi chisangalalo, komanso ululu ndi zowawa zosaneneka. Ndikofunika kusiya zomwezo mu nthawi ndikupeza mphamvu zothetsera maubwenzi amenewa, chifukwa chiyembekezo cha kutha kwachisangalalo ndi chochepa kwambiri.