Ubwenzi ndi mgwirizano wofanana mu moyo wa munthu aliyense, monga chikondi. Choncho, tonsefe timafuna kukhala ndi anzathu. Atsikana ena amakonda anthu okhaokha, koma ena sangathe kukhala opanda kampani yamwamuna. Koma pokambirana momasuka ndi anyamata, nthawi zonse mumakhala kuti wina mwa inu adzayamba kukondana, ndipo izi ndi njira yake yeniyeni yowopsya. Ndi chifukwa chake atsikana ambiri amasangalala ndi funsoli, momwe angaphunzire kukhala mabwenzi ndi anyamata kuti asakondane?
Uzani chitoliro "ayi"
Ngati mukufunadi kukhala mabwenzi ndi achinyamata, musalole kuti mukhale ndi makhalidwe kotero kuti anyamata aganizire zachilendo cha aplanonic. Atsikana ambiri nthawi zambiri amakopeka ndi anyamata basi kuti asangalale ndikudzidalira. Ndi anzanga ndi bwino kuti musachite zimenezo. Anyamata sakuzindikira kuti atsikana amafunika kukonda zokhazokha, osati chifukwa chakuti mwamuna yemwe amamukonda ndikufuna kuti akhale naye pamtundu wina osati chiyanjano. Choncho, ngati mutayika nthabwala mosayenera mwachindunji kwa mnyamata, "kuwombera" maso ndi zina zotero, ndizoopsa kuti adzionetseratu chikondi choterechi ngati chizindikiro chochitapo kanthu ndikuyesera kukhazikitsa ndi inu chikondi chachikondi. Choncho, ngati simukufuna kutaya mnzanu wapamtima, khalani ndi anzanu komanso anzanu. Pambuyo pake, simukumwetulira msungwana wa nkhope ziwiri ndipo simukuwatsitsimula. Ndi anyamata, muyenera kuchita chimodzimodzi. Ayenera kukhala otsimikiza kuti mumawaona okha, komanso osati chinthu chogonana. Ngati mkazi nthawi zina amalola kuti iyeyo ndi mwanayo asakhale ndi zosayenera, posachedwa adzaganizabe za kugonana, ndipo ngakhale akunena kuti simudzasokoneza bwenzi, siziri choncho. Munthu amene amadziwa kuti wachiwiri yekha ndi bwenzi, amadziwa mwachidziwikire kuti amayamba kukondana, ndipo ngati maganizo ake sakhala ovomerezeka, ndiye kuti bwenzi lenileni lingathe kukhala chigwirizano, komanso chidani. Kotero, amayi okondedwa, nthawizonse muziyang'ana khalidwe lanu mu gulu la amuna, kotero kuti musayambe kusokoneza zotsatira za vuto lomwe mwalenga.
Khalani bwenzi lenileni
Ngati mukufuna achinyamata kuti akhale ndi anzanu nthawi zonse, muyenera kukhala enieni, osati bwenzi lanu. Mwa njirayi, izi sizikutanthauza kuti mukuyenera kuchita chilichonse kuti anyamata aiwale kuti ndinu woimira zachiwerewere. Amuna ayenera kukuwonetsani ulemu ngati msungwana, thandizo ndi zina zotero. Izi ndizosiyana kwambiri. Muyenera kumvetsetsa anyamatawa ndikugawana nawo zokondweretsa. Ndili ndi abwenzi kuti anyamata akunena za mpira, za magalimoto, ndi zovala. Pamene mkazi ayamba kusonyeza kuti sakulemekeza zofuna zawo, kukakamiza maganizo azimayi ndi zina zotero, mwamuna amasiya kumuwona mzake. Kwa anyamata ndizomveka komanso zomveka kuti akazi samvetsa. Iwo ali apo ndipo amalekerera izo. Amakonda atsikana awo, koma mabwenzi awo samawawerengera. Choncho, ngati mukufuna kukhala bwenzi komanso bwenzi, ndiye khalidwe ngati mnzanu. Muyenera kukonzekera kuti mukambirane ndi amayi ena komanso kugonjetsa kugonana, osati nthawi zonse. Mudzapita kwa iwo pa mpira, kukambilana zatsopano za masewera a pakompyuta, kukhala m'galimoto ndikumwa, pamene mukuyesera kudziwa zomwe zachitika pa galimoto panthawiyi. Palibe amene adzakakamiza kuti muchite chinachake kuchokera mndandandawu, chifukwa cha bwenzi khalidwe ili ndilochibadwa . Mnyamata sadzakukondani nanu, ngati m'maganizo mwake muli bwenzi, koma ndi nerd. Choncho, yesetsani kuchita nthawi zonse kuti achinyamata asakumbukire kuti ndinu mkazi, omwe muli ndi maganizo osiyana kwambiri omwe mungathe kuwakonda, koma kuti simungathe kukhala nawo.
Kodi tiyenera kukhala achikazi?
Atsikana ambiri amaganizira za funsoli, zomwe zimakhudza momwe anthu amachitira. Mosakayikira, zimakhudza, koma izi sizikutanthauza kuti msungwana ayenera kusiya kukhala wachikazi chifukwa cha ubwenzi wake ndi anyamata. M'malo mwake, ayenera kusiya kukhala wofooka komanso wopanda thandizo. Amayi ambiri amawoneka ngati akukopa chidwi, amapatsa amuna mwayi wokhala otetezeka, ndipo kumverera kumathandizira kuti anthu amve chifundo. Choncho, ngati simukufuna kuti anyamata akuchitireni ngati msungwana, khalani odziimira. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti simuyenera kutembenukira kwa anzanu kuti awathandize. Palibe chomwecho, chifukwa anthu amathandizana wina ndi mzake. Ngati inu nokha mukudziwa kuti mungathe kuthana ndi vuto lanu, musawone abwenzi anu osasangalala ndipo musonyeze kuti popanda thandizo lanu ndinu wofooka komanso wodalira, simudzatha. Amuna akamadziwa kuti chibwenzi chawo sichimawathandiza, amakhala ndi ulemu waukulu, monga momwe amachitira wina ndi mzake. Choncho, chotsani magrimaces anu kwa amuna omwe akufunadi kunyengerera. Ndipo abwenzi anu aziwalola iwo kuti awone chikhalidwe cholimba ndi chodziimira, chomwe chingakhoze kupita pa kampeni ndi iwo, ndi kunyamula chikwama, ndi kuthandizira, mu chinachake. Inde, simukuyenera kupita patali ndikuyesa kuchita zomwe zachiwerengero zomwe amayi sangakwanitse. Musati muzitsimikizira kuti ndinu wofanana momwemo. Muli ndi ufulu wokhala wachikazi, kuvala zidendene, kavalidwe kafashoni ndikuyendetsa pafupi ndi anzanu mumtengo wapadera. Adzakhala okondwa kuti ali ndi bwenzi labwino komanso lokongola. Koma panthawi imodzimodziyo muyenera kukhala nawo pamodzi ndi "mitu yawo", kudzikondweretsa okha monga iwo komanso nthawi iliyonse popanda kunyezimira ndi zhidkompereobuyvatsya mumaseche, kuvala T-shirt yakale ndikupita ndi anyamata awo. Kumbukirani izi nthawi zonse, ndiyeno mukhoza kukhala bwenzi lawo lenileni.
Ndipo komabe, musamasewere kapena kuyesa kutsanzira zomwe simukuzichita. Inde, atsikana okha omwe ali ndi chidwi ndi zosangalatsa za anyamatawa, njira yawo ya moyo, nthabwala zawo, nthawi yawo, akhoza kukhala mabwenzi ndi anyamatawo. Choncho, atsikana oterowa ndi ovuta kumvetsetsa achinyamata, chifukwa iwo eni ali ndi lingaliro limeneli. Ngati mtsikanayo ayesa kukhala wotero, ndiye kuti, ubwenzi wake ndi anyamatawo ndipadera, zomwe akuyesera kuti atsimikizire wina. Ndipo izi siziyenera kuchitika konse. Ndipotu, musamadzikakamize kuti mukhale paubwenzi ndi munthu wina. Msungwana wina ndi wokondweretsa kwambiri m'mabanja a amayi, ndipo winayo ndi amzake. Ndipo palibe chinthu chowopsya mu izi: Mwachidule, ngati mutangosewera muubwenzi, ndiye anyamata amangomva kuti ndinu osakhulupirika ndikusiya kukuwonani ngati bwenzi lanu. Ndipo iyi ndiyo njira yeniyeni yopita ku chikondi, kapena kudana. Choncho, ngati muli mabwenzi ndi anyamata, muyenera kutsimikiza kuti mukufuna kuchokera kwa iwo enieni.
Ambiri amakhulupirira kuti pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi sangathe kukhala bwenzi. Ndipotu izi si zoona. Asungwana ena sangathe kudzichitira okha ndi abwenzi okha basi, ndipo izi zimapangitsanso amuna kutanthauzira maubwenzi kuchokera kwa anzanu kwa ena, ochezeka kwambiri. Ngati mkazi akufuna kuti akhale bwenzi, osayesayesa kukondana ndi kukondana, ndiye pambali pake padzakhala bwino, odalirika enieni komanso abwenzi enieni-abwenzi.