Mlamu wake ndi mpongozi wake - chiyanjano pakati pa amayi awiri sichikulirakulira nthawi zonse. Ngakhale muzojambula zachikhalidwe, mwachitsanzo, mu miyambi ndi mawu, maubwenzi osokonezekawa akuwonetsedwa (apongozi ake pa chitofu, kuti galu ali pa unyolo, kapena_kuchokera kwa apongozi anu amakugwetsani misozi ndi misonzi) kumene mpongozi wawo nthawizonse amavulazidwa.
Kawirikawiri pa magawo oyambirira a moyo wa banja laling'ono pali mikangano yokwanira ndi apongozi ake. Nthawi zina mikangano siimaima kwa zaka zambiri. Ziri zovuta kuti mpongozi wake apulumuke kupsyinjika kosalekeza kwa apongozi ake, amene, kuyambira kutalika kwa moyo wake, amaona kuti zingatheke kusokoneza moyo wa banja lachinyamata. Kuphatikizanso, mikangano yambiri pakati pa apongozi awo ndi apongozi awo ndi chifukwa cha kusowa kwa malingaliro pa ulimi, kulera ana, ndi zina zambiri. Ndipotu, tikufunikira kukumbukira choonadi chodziwikiratu - palibe anthu ofanana nawo padziko lapansi, choncho malingaliro omwewo.
Inde, sizovuta kuti akhale apongozi anu, koma pokhapokha ngati simutha kuchitira nsanje mwana wamwamuna. Koma chirichonse chingakhale chabwino ngati mutasintha maganizo anu kwa apongozi anu. Inde, ndi zovuta, koma ndinu ambuye ndikulowa m'nyumba, m'banja lanu munthu watsopano. Momwe mungamangire ubale kuyambira pachiyambi, zidzatero. Tenga mkazi uyu monga yemwe adzakhale, monga momwe mumasamalirira mwana wanu. Amamukonda - ndi wabwino naye ndipo ali wokondwa. Ndipo ndi chiyaninso chomwe amayi amafunikira chimwemwe, monga kuzindikira kuti mwana wanu ali wokondwa. Pangani mwana wamkazi wa mwana wamkazi, ndipo nthawi zonse muzidziwa zochitika zonse ndipo simudzasiyidwa nokha. Ndipotu, muli ndi zofanana - ndizofunikira kwa mwana wanu, banja lake.
Mmene mungathetsere mkangano pakati pa mkazi ndi apongozi ake? Akatswiri a zamaganizo amatsimikiza kuti kusagwirizana pakati pa mpongozi ndi apongozi ake akugwirizana ndi kutsutsidwa kotheratu - ineyo. Kaya apongozi ake anachita chiyani, apongozi ake sali choncho. Wotsuka mbale amatsuka cholakwika, sichichotsa, mwa mawu amodzi zinthu zonse ndi zoipa. Ana aakazi ndi apongozi awo akulakanso pamene amayesa kutulutsa apongozi awo, komanso ngakhale ndi changu. Makhalidwe oipa ndi pamene apongozi ake onse ndi apongozi awo amayamba kudandaula ndi mwana wawo wamwamuna. Izo sizidzatsogolera ku chirichonse chabwino.
Ngati mumamvetsera kwa amayi omwe akhala zaka zoposa khumi muukwati, zimawonekeratu kuti sikutheka kupeza njira yeniyeni ya chiyanjano chanu. Tiyese kukonda amayi anga apamtima, tilemekezeni - ndi amene anabala ndikulera wokondedwa wanu.
Vuto ndi lovuta kwambiri kuti pali mafunso ambiri kuposa mayankho. M'banja lililonse, zonse zimasankhidwa mwa njira yake. Zimakhala zovuta kwambiri kuti mpongozi wake alowe m'banja ndipo amalowe m'malo mwake, ndipo apongozi ake adzakhala ovuta kugwirizanitsa ndi izi. Zoonadi, izi ndizomwe mukukhala mosiyana. Koma ngakhale apo, osati nthawizonse, zimatuluka, kukhalabe ndi ubale wabwinobwino. Ndipo ngati banja laling'ono liyenera kukhala pansi pa denga limodzi ndi makolo awo, ndiye pali vuto la amayi awiri mu khitchini imodzi. Ndipo m'banja lomwelo muli funso lokhazikitsa malamulo atsopano a khalidwe, ndipo izi si zophweka.
Mwinamwake zozoloŵera. Woyamba amakhala wodwala yekha, ndipo mayi wachikondi kwambiri amayang'anira nthawi iliyonse. Zofuna zake zimapititsa kuzinthu zonse - thanzi, komwe angapume mpaka mtundu wa wallpaper. Ndipo ngati apongozi awo amakhala ndi achinyamata mnyumba imodzi, nthawi zonse amapita popanda kugogoda m'chipinda chanu ndikuchita chilichonse chimene akufuna. Pukuta fumbi, kuphimba bedi ndikukhumudwabe, ngati palibe amene akuyamikira. Malangizo abwino kwa apongozi ake pa nkhaniyi sikuti azipita kukadandaula kwa mwamuna wake za amayi ake. Lankhulani naye ndipo muwone maganizo anu.
Mwamuna sangathe kuthetsa mkangano pakati pa amayi awiri ndi amayi ndi akazi ake, izi ndi zoona. Mmenemo, iye ndi gulu lovulazidwa, yemwe akuyenera kusankha. Adzakhala wamantha, koma sadzasankha. Ndipo ngati chisankhocho chikhala chosapeweka, ndiye kuti banja lidzatha.
Akatswiri a zamaganizo amati - munthu sayenera kuyandikira mavuto m'banja chifukwa cha mfundo yoyenera ndi yolakwa. Tiyeni tiyese kumvetsetsa, chifukwa cha mavuto omwe alipo pakati pa mpongozi ndi apongozi ake.
Akazi awiri oyambirira amagawanitsa mwamuna mmodzi ndi wachiwiri - malo m'banja, kufalitsa maudindo, nsanje ndi chilakolako chochotsa mdaniyo. Muzochitika zotere ndikofunikira kuvomereza ndi kumvetsetsa malo omwe akugwiritsidwa ntchito. N'zovuta, koma n'zotheka.
Nazi malangizo ena kwa apongozi anu, momwe mungapewe mikangano. Lemekeza kusankha mwana wamwamuna, iye amasangalala ndi mkazi wake ndipo muyenera kumutenga kuti akhale ndani. Yesetsani kupereka malangizo anu pokhapokha mutapemphedwa kuchita zimenezo. Perekani mwayi kwa mzimayi amene akuthandizira kuti achite, adzalimbikitsabe maganizo ake, ndipo nkhondoyo idzakhala yosapeweka. Musadandaule za mpongozi wanu kwa mwana wanu. Konzani onse pamodzi ndi mpongozi wake, iyeyo ali pamlingo ndi iwe ali ndi ufulu wosankha m'banja. Ndipo pamene zidzukulu zimawoneka, mumapeza udindo wa agogo. Izi zili ndi udindo waukulu, koma sakupatsani ufulu woyenera kugwira ntchito za amayi. Yesetsani kumvetsetsa kuti simungalowe m'malo mwa mayi ali ndi mwana. Marlene Dietrich atati: "Ngati mukumva mapiko m'mapewa anu, ndiye kuti muli ndi mpongozi wabwino" Ndikofunika ngati apongozi anu ali ndi lingaliro lomwelo.
Ndipo mpongozi wamkazi ayenera kuchita chiyani, kuti chiyanjano ndi apongozi ake apite. Muyenera kumvetsetsa bwino kuti mukulowa m'banja komwe kuli amayi, komanso malamulo ena a banja, ndipo muyenera kuphunzira momwe mungawalemekezere. Pakati pa mkangano, sungani moyo ndi chipiriro. Musati mudandaule kwa mwamuna wanu za apongozi anu, izi kawirikawiri zimabweretsa mavuto aakulu. Konzani mkangano wanu nokha ndipo musamaphatikizepo mwamuna mmenemo.
Musakambirane ndi apongozi anu ubale pakati pa inu ndi mwamuna wanu. Musamaimbe apongozi anu kuti akuleredwa bwino. Pangani ubale wanu ndi iye, mumusankha. Lemezani moyo wa apongozi anu ndi ulemu. Malangizo ake pa kuchita bizinesi angakhale othandiza kwa inu. Ndipo pakubadwa kwa mwana, mwamsanga mudziwe malo anu oyamba mu kulera kwa mwana. Ndipo musaiwale za kulemekeza munthu wamkulu.
Mmene mungathetsere mkangano pakati pa mkazi ndi apongozi ake? Chofunika kwambiri ndi kusaiwala kukhululukira ndikupempha chikhululuko. Ndani ali wanzeru kuchita izi poyamba? Mtendere mu nyumba ndi gawo lofunika kwambiri la chisangalalo cha amai.