Masiku ano, zikuwoneka kuti anthu asiya kukhala okhulupirika ndi okhulupirika, kuti chirichonse chigulitsidwa ndi kugulidwa, kotero inu simungakhoze kukhulupirira wina aliyense. Koma ngati mumakonda, simungakhulupirire bwanji munthu amene mumamufuna? Ndipotu, panopa, simungathe kulankhula za ubale weniweni, chifukwa maziko a chirichonse akhala akudalira nthawi zonse. Akazi amakono amaopa kwambiri chifukwa cha kusakhulupirika kwa oimira za kugonana kolimba. Ziri zovuta kukhulupirira kuti pali amuna enieni, pamene pali amayi ambiri omwe sapezeka ndi chilichonse, koma apatseni anyamata chilichonse chomwe akufuna.
M'madera ambiri anthu akhala akuganiza kuti palibe munthu amene angakhale wokhulupirika mokwanira. Amanena kuti banjali silingaganize kuti kugonana kwenikweni ndi kusakhulupirika kwenikweni, kotero iwo amapita kwa iwo mophweka. Ndipo mwatsoka, ndi bwino kuzindikira kuti amuna ambiri amatsatira maganizo awa, ngakhale ngati sakuvomereza. Koma apo pali achinyamata okhulupirika. Koma zochepa chabe zachitika m'dziko lathu lapansi.
Akazi osakhulupirika
Kulankhula zaumunthu, mwinamwake, nkoyenera kukumbukira kuti ena mwa amunawo adasinthidwa ndi amayi. Kwa mnyamata yemwe sasintha, kusintha ndiko tchimo lalikulu kwambiri. Amuna amenewa samakhululukira khalidwe loipa. Popeza kwa iwo wokondedwa wokondedwa ndiye weniweni, sangathe kulingalira kuti mayi wa mtima akhoza kumvetsera kwa wina. N'zomvetsa chisoni kuti anyamata amenewa nthawi zambiri amabwera ndi akazi omwe ali ndi mphepo. Ndipo pambuyo pa kusakhulupirika kwotsatira, iwo akufika kumapeto kuti kukhulupirika kwawo ndi otsalira a kale. Chotsatira chake, anyamatawo amadziyesa okha ndikukhalitsa pansi amayi, kapena amayamba kudzichita okha ngati amuna azimayi. Ndipotu, safuna kukhumudwitsa munthu wina, mmene angasokoneze chitonzo mwa iwo okha. Nkhanza nthawi zonse zimanyozetsa ulemu wa munthuyo, ndipo nthawi zina pamene munthuyo sangakwanitse kuchita zinthu zoterezi, nthawi zambiri amamukhumudwitsa. Kotero, kuyang'ana pa amuna amphamvu, musafulumire kuwaweruza iwo ndi kuwadzudzula chifukwa chowononga zolinga za amayi. Mwinamwake, tsogolo lawo lidathanso kusweka chifukwa cha ena oimira zachiwerewere.
Zizindikiro za munthu weniweni
Ngati munthu ali wokhulupirika, ndiye kuti kukhulupirika kwake kukuwonetseredwa m'zinthu zonse. Choyamba, banja (mkazi wokondedwa) ndilo loyambirira. Iye nthawi zonse amayesa kuti azikhala ndi nthawi yambiri ndi mayi wa mtima wake. Mwa njira, izi sizikutanthauza kuti mnyamatayu adzakana kwa abwenzi. Mwachidule, iye akufuna kuti azikonda nthawizonse anali naye. Ndipo malingaliro ake, iye nthawizonse amaika mochepa pang'ono kuposa kumverera kwa ena. Munthu wokhulupirika, choyamba, sali owona, koma mwachidziwitso. Iye samadzilola yekha kuti ayang'ane akazi ena, iye sakufuna kwenikweni. Amuna amenewa nthawi zambiri samakhala okondweretsa kwa atsikana onse, kupatulapo apadera. Nthawi zambiri anthu amtundu uwu amakhalabe osasamala, ngakhale kuti ndi ochuluka kwambiri. Amuna okhulupirika okha sasintha maganizo awo. Ngati ayamba kukomana pa nthawi yeniyeni, sikuti ndizokha, koma kuti amange ubale. Ndicho chifukwa chake anyamatawa alibe ubale ndi amayi ambiri, ngakhale ali okonzeka pafupifupi chirichonse. Mnyamata wokhulupirika angaganize kuti ndibwino kuti nthawi yomweyo adziwe kuti sakuwona mkazi wake wam'tsogolo mwa msungwana uyu, kuposa kumupweteka mtsogolo. Mwa njira, ndizoyenera kudziwa kuti amuna okhulupirika akuyamba chiyanjano, akuwonezera awo momwe angakhalire mkazi. Iwo alibe chinthu monga "pomatrosil ndi kusiya". Anyamata oterewa angasankhe nthawi yayitali kuti achite zochitika zazikulu (mwachitsanzo, kugonana), koma ngati izi zichitika, ndiye kuti ndi wotsimikiza kuti mtsikanayo ndi yekhayo ndipo akufuna kuti akhale naye komanso yekha.
Zifukwa za Zoona
Ambiri amakhulupirira kuti amuna omwe ali okwatirana komanso osakhala ndi chidziwitso cha kugonana ali okhulupirika, kotero amangoopa kudzidzinsoza kwinakwake pambali. Koma kwenikweni, pali gawo limodzi chabe la choonadi mwa izi. Okhulupirika angakhale amuna omwe ali ndi chidziwitso chogonana, komanso zoona, ngakhale pamene ali ndi nthawi yambiri yosiya kugonana. Zirizonse zomwe amalankhula za kugonana zimati, koma alipo awiri omwe ali ndi khalidwe lachiyanjano ndilofunika kwambiri kuposa thupi. Amamvetsetsa kuti kupewera kwawo kumachitidwa ndi munthu wodwala amene amamukonda ndipo pamapeto pake amangotaya.
Ndibwino kwa mwamuna wokhulupirika
Koma ziribe kanthu momwe munthu analiri wokhulupirika, komabe nthawi zonse ndi koyenera kuyesa kuti akhale mkazi uja yemwe sungaganizire za kusintha kwake. Chifukwa ngakhale achikondi, achifundo ndi owona mtima angathe zaka zambiri kukhala opirira ndi chisoni, madandaulo, zopweteka. Ndiyeno zonsezo zidzasweka. Ndipo samoestrasnoe ija, idzaphwasuka osati mthupi basi, iyo ikuswa mwamakhalidwe. Ngati mkazi nthawi zonse samakhutira ndi chinachake, amatsutsa, amakwiya, amafuula, ndiye pamapeto pake pali mkazi yemwe amawona mwamunthu wokongola mowona mtima ndikumupatsa chifundo ndi chikondi chimene mkazi wake sangathe kupereka. Ndiye munthu wokhulupirikayo anaiwala za kukhulupirika kwake. Ngakhale, mwinamwake, sikuli koyenera kulankhula za kukhulupirika kuno. Zikatero, chikondi chimangowonongeka. Ndipo pamene kumverera uku kwatha, ndiye palibe munthu wokhala wokhulupirika.
Ndichifukwa chake, ziribe kanthu kuti munthu wachifundo, wofatsa ndi woonamtima, mwamunayo yemwe ali ndi mwayi wokhala ndi chuma choterocho, sayenera kuchitapo kanthu, ndipo makamaka, kuti amasangalale ndi maganizo ake. Ngati mkazi akuwona kuti mnyamatayo sangathe kusakhulupirika ndipo nthawi zonse amamupembedza yekhayo, osasamala, "khala pamutu pako." Musaiwale kunena mwamuna, kumukumbutsa kuti iye ndi wabwino kwa inu. Mwamuna ayenera nthawi zonse kuona kuti mumamukonda, mumamufuna ndipo mukufuna kumakhala naye limodzi. Komanso, musalole kuti chizoloŵezicho chikugwireni. Ngakhalenso njonda yodalirika nthawi zina imafuna zina. Ndipo chilichonse chimene chimafunikira kuti awateteze pambali, pangani moyo wanu nthano kapena chikondi cha chikondi. Kuyenda, ngati akukonda, pitani kuzinthu zing'onozing'ono, khalani ndi chidwi ndi zomwe zimamugwira. Mwachidziwikire, tenga mbali mu moyo wake, ndipo usagwire mbali imodzi.
Amuna okhulupilika akhala akutha kukonda kwenikweni. Iwo ali okonzeka kuchita chilichonse kwa amayi awo ndipo sakufuna kupereka adiol. Choncho, yesetsani kulipira munthu wanu "ndalama imodzi." Ndiyeno muyenera kukhala muukwati kwa moyo wautali komanso wokongola kwambiri.