Kodi nthawi zambiri chiyanjano chathu ndi wokondedwa chimachepa chifukwa chachinyengo ... Ndipo kodi kwenikweni kukhulupirika, kusakhulupirika, kudalira chiyanjano? Ndiyenera kukonzekera kuti ndisonyeze lingaliro langa pa nkhaniyi, ndikudziwa bwino kuti kutanthauzira kwathunthu kwa funso la kukhulupirika, kusakhulupirika ndi kudalira kuyanjana kuli kofala pakati pa anthu.
Ndikhulupirira kwambiri, palibe kusakhulupirika konse - kulimbikitsana wina ndi mzake, zolinga zofanana ndi zolinga za m'tsogolo - ndizo zomwe zimatsimikizira chidaliro mwa awiriwa ndi kukhazikika mu chiyanjano. Kusakhulupirika - izi ndizochitika m "maubwenzi apabanja nthawi zambiri, ndipo simungayese chizindikiro chofanana pakati pa kusakhulupirika ndi kusakhulupirika, izi ndizosiyana kwambiri.
Kodi ndi chiyani chomwe chimatengedwa kuti ndiuchigawenga?
Ulendo wopita kumanzere kwa mmodzi wa okwatirana kapena mamembala a mgwirizano wapakati. Kaŵirikaŵiri amalankhula za kuperekedwa kwa amuna, pamene akazi amapitanso kumbali imodzi, mocheperapo. Chifukwa chakuti mkazi yemwe amagwira ntchito ndipo ali, kupatula mwamuna wake, nayenso mmodzi kapena awiri, palibe nthawi yeniyeni ya izo
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Kotero, ngakhale ndi chilakolako champhamvu chogwiritsira ntchito "chisokonezo" ichi sichidzapambana. Kotero funso likubwera ngati kuli kukhulupirika kapena kusowa mwayi wochita chinyengo, ndipo ndi chikhulupiliro chotani mu ubale chomwe chingakhalepo ngati mkazi amangokhala "kulowetsedwa" m'goli ndi kukokera moyo?
Mwamuna wokwatiwa nthawi zonse amakhala ndi mafoni komanso amfulu. Pitani ku malo amtendere - pali lingaliro lakuti pali amuna ambiri okwatirana omwe amalembedwa kuposa kufunafuna moyo wawo wapamtima. Chifukwa chiyani? Ngati amuna okwatirana omwe akungofunafuna kugonana, zimatanthauza kuti sagonana muukwati. Chomwe chimakondweretsa kwambiri, chidziwitso chaukwati chikhoza kukhala kuchokera ku zero mpaka kuperewera.
Kodi nchiyani chomwe chimafotokoza kuti "zhenatiki" kusakhutira koteroko? "Mkazi samadziwa momwe akufuna kapena sakufuna kuchita kapena ayi ... Iye ali wotanganidwa kwambiri ... Tili ndi zosiyana ... Palibe kugonana ndi mkazi ... Mkazi ndi mkate, koma nthawi zina mumakonda"
Ndikukutsimikizirani kuti, mkazi wokwatiwa akhoza kulemba mndandanda wa zolakwika za kugonana ndi mwamuna wake, zomwe, kwenikweni, si chifukwa chofuna kukhutira zosowa zawo kumbali. Pofufuza zomwe zimachitika pakati pa mabwenzi anu ndi abwenzi anu, mumatsimikiza kuti mkazi wokwatiwa akhoza kugonana ndi mwamuna wina (sindikunena chigololo), muzochitika zosiyana.
Kuchita zachiwerewere komanso kulepheretsa mwayi
Ubale wina uliwonse, kaya ukwati walamulo kapena boma, kapena osakwatirane, ndi ... kumatanthauza kuchepetsa ufulu wa aliyense amene alowa mgwirizano. Ndipo ngati tiganiza kuti munthu aliyense akhoza kukhala wosangalala, kokha kukhala womasuka, zingakhale bwino kwa aliyense ngati panalibe malamulo oletsa ufulu wa mgwirizanowu.Ayi, si zachiwerewere. Ndizochiwerewere kukayikira okondedwa anu ndi kubweretsa ubongo wawo ku nsanje yawo ndikuwapangitsa iwo kunama ndikudzilungamitsa okha. N'chimodzimodzinso kudziletsa kugonana kwaokha chifukwa cholakwira, kapena chifukwa cha chinyengo chomwe sichitengera ubale wapamtima. Inde, kubwereranso kuti kusakhulupirika kwenikweni, sikutheka.
Sikuti mgwirizano wonse wa banja umachokera ku chikondi, mwina sungakhale woyambirira, ukhoza kudutsa ndi nthawi ... Ndi chiyanjano chanji chomwe tikhoza kukambirana? Kugonana kumbali kumangokhala kugonana kumbali. Ndipo ngati muli ndi malingaliro, ndikugonana pambali - izi sizinthu zonyansa, ndizogonana, chifukwa simukusowa kusokoneza chikondi ndi kugonana.
Kuti mumvetse wokondedwa wanu ...
Ndikofunika kuyesa kumvetsetsa okondedwa anu (okondedwa). Munthu mmodzi sangathe kukwanitsa zosowa zonse za wina, ngakhale wokondedwa. Choncho, simusowa "kudyetsa" wokondedwa wanu, mulole munthuyo akhale ndi mwayi wokhutiritsa zosoweka zake, ndipo adzamva bwino, ndipo izi zidzakhudza kwambiri ubale wanu. Chokhacho chiri chonse chiyenera kukhala cholingana, ndiko kuti, ufulu uyenera kupezeka kwa onse awiri.
Izi ndi zovuta kumvetsa ndi kuvomereza. Koma, pamene mungagwiritse ntchito mmoyo wanu, mudzasangalala kwambiri. Musadzizunze nokha ndi wokondedwa wanu ndi nsanje, chifukwa nsanje siichiwonetsero cha chikondi. Wokondedwa si chuma chanu, amapatsidwa kwa inu kuti mukondwere kuti ali pafupi ndi inu.
Mutha kuwona, kumva, kupuma ndi mpweya umodzi! Ichi ndi chimwemwe! Choncho musasokoneze chimwemwe chanu ndi nsanje. Nsanje iwononga maubwenzi ndipo imapha malingaliro. Samalani malingaliro anu ndi malingaliro a okondedwa anu, muziwadalira, musamawayese iwo, musamangoganiza kalikonse. Ganizirani momwe moyo wanu udzasinthire ngati mutasiya kukonda munthu uyu, ndipo ngati mudzipha nokha, kodi mungasangalale kwambiri?
Kukhala m'banja popanda chikondi n'kovuta, ndipo nthawi zambiri satha. Ngati maubwenzi ndi ofunika kwa okondedwa anu, bwerezani monga pemphero: "Ndimangoganizira za ubale wanga ndi wokondedwa wanga, osati mu chiyanjano ndi wina, chifukwa cha ine palibe chofunika kwambiri komanso choposa mtengo umenewu. Ndipo ine sindidzawawononge konse iwo ndi malingaliro anga, chifukwa nsanje ndi chiwonetsero cha umwini, osati wachikondi.
"Ngati ndili ndi nsanje, sindimakonda."
Izi ndi zovuta kuphunzira, koma, podziwa, mudzamva mophweka mosavuta. Ngakhale munthu mmodzi yekha kuchokera ku mgwirizanowu akufika pamtunda wotere, ubale udzakhala wamphamvu ndi wokhalitsa. Chinthu china, ngati maganizo awa sali ...