Mwinamwake, muyenera kuvomereza nthawi yomweyo pamaganizo. Kwa funso lakuti "wanga-mlendo" angayandikire kuchokera ku malo osiyanasiyana: chikhalidwe, maganizo, kugonana. Tikhoza kuganiza kuti anthu onse - kukoka, mukhoza "onse" akuganiza zao. Nthawi zambiri zimachitika kuti mwamuna amakhala ndi mmodzi, amakomana (moyang'anizana) pamzake, koma amakondadi chachitatu. Ndipo ndi ndani?
Ubale
Tiyeni tigwirizane, pambuyo pa zonse, kuti tiganizire anthu osadziwika omwe ali ndi mkazi wovomerezeka: mkazi, chibwenzi, cohabitant. Ndipo tiyeni tiyankhule za momwe tingachitire ndi iwo muzosiyana. Choyamba, ndipo nthawi yomweyo: tikakumana pa ulendo wathu "munthu wachilendo", tifunika kusankha zokhumba zathu ndi zolinga zathu. Akatswiri a zamaganizo amanena zimenezo kwa mkazi - ndi masekondi 6-10. Pambuyo pa mphindi zochepazi zomwe akudziwa kale (kuti atsike pansi) kuti akhale ndi munthu ameneyu, kapena, zomwe akufuna kuchokera kwa iye. Chabwino, zabwino, chifukwa, amuna, kwa nthawi yayitali kwambiri ndi izi sizingathetsedwe. Nthawi zina amatenga zaka kuti azindikire kuti msonkhano umenewu unali wokondweretsa, ndipo ndi mkaziyu ali wokonzeka kukhala moyo wake wonse. Kotero, ife timatenga chirichonse mmanja mwathu.
Choyamba, taganizirani zochitika zingapo, pamene munthu wachilendo amatisangalatsidwa, ndipo ife sitikufuna kuti titenge chilichonse chomwe chimachokera ku mgwirizano wa pakomoni.
Mkhalidwe wa bwana-subordinate (ogwirizana)
Kawirikawiri, abambo aamuna amadziwa mosadziwika kuti gawo lachikazi ndilo mtundu wa anthu omwe amatha kukhala nawo ("onse ndi anga, zomwe ndikufuna, ndizitenga izi ndipo sindidzakana"). Mwamuna akhoza kukhumudwa chifukwa choopa kufotokozedwa, momwe mkazi wake amachitira, akuluakulu ake, kapena kusowa chidwi kwa kugonana kwa akazi kapena makamaka. Koma ngati bwana "moto", ndiye kuti muyenera kukhala osamala makamaka chifukwa inu simukufuna kusiya chifukwa cha zilakolako zake!
Njira: Chikondi cha Plato
Palibe chinthu chabwino koposa ngati chikondi chenicheni, chotseguka, choyera kwa olamulira (chidzamupweteka), mawonetseredwe ake omwe ali ochepa chifukwa cha kulera kwanu ndi zochitika zake (ukwati wake).
Machenjerero: kusamvetsetsa, "kodi kwenikweni amatanthauza chiyani"
Mudzakhala ndi chitsimikizo chopusa, yemwe poyamba sadziwa zomwe munthuyo akuyendetsa (nthawi zambiri amasiya mwayi umenewu kwa ife, chifukwa chakuya kwambiri amawopa kuti akanidwa ndipo safuna kutenga udindo ngakhale pa nthawi yayitali). Ngati mwafotokozera mwachindunji chinthu chilichonse, muyenera kudabwa, kuyendetsa manja anu ndi kuchita zonse mwanjira yomwe simungathe:
a) ayambe kukonda chikondi;
b) ayambe ndi mwamuna wokwatiwa.
Ngakhale zili choncho, anthu ali ofanana mofanana, izi sizikhala zosavuta konse. Ndiponsotu, nkofunikira kukhala ndi maubwenzi abwino, malingaliro abwino mu timuyi. Sungani mtunda mu chikondi kapena chilakolako chogwirizana ndichosavuta kusiyana ndi bwana.
Ndondomekoyi: kutsindika kufunika kwa maubwenzi amenewo omwe alipo kale; onetsetsani kuti izi sizothandiza pangozi. Ndi mnzanu kapena bwenzi la bizinesi ndibwino kuti musakhale abwenzi, koma kuti mukhale abwenzi: kupita kumadzulo, kumwa khofi. Ndipo, ndithudi, kugwirizanitsa kwambiri - mgwirizano wodzinso umapereka lingaliro la chibwenzi, nthawizina ngakhale chamtengo wapatali kuposa kugonana.
Mkhalidwe: mnzanu wapamtima wa munthu wokondedwa
Zinthu ndizoopsa, chifukwa apa pakubwera kale kumenyana kwa amuna. Ndipo mwa njira inayake muyenera kutembenukira pakati pa moto wachiwiri: simuyenera kuyambitsa wokhumudwa wa wokondedwa ndi nthawi imodzimodzi ngati mkazi kwa bwenzi lake lapamtima, chifukwa kuvomereza kwake kapena kutsutsidwa kwa mwamuna wanu sikutanthauza.
Njira: Kuphwanyidwa mosavuta, osati kutengeka.
Makhalidwe amenewa amachititsa kuti moyo, malingaliro aumunthu aumunthu, ndi malingaliro awiriwa athe kukhala m'malo mwa chilakolako chosadziwika.
Mwamuna wokondedwa wa bwenzi lake lapamtima
Izi, mwinamwake, ndizovuta kwambiri. Pa mbali imodzi, iye amanyansidwa ndichabechabe (iye ali ndi abambo abwino kwambiri - chibwenzi chako, ndipo amakukokera!), Pachilombochi - amaopseza kuti asasokoneze ubale weniweni, koma ndi mtengo wapatali kwambiri ndi bwenzi, komanso nthawi yomweyo ndi moyo wake. Ndipo apa sikofunikira ayi, ndipo osamukana mwamunayo mwamunayo ndipo nthawi yomweyo mumakhala naye bwino (muyenera kuyankhulana), komanso kusunga chinthu chilichonse chobisika, kuti winayo asadziwe. Izi nthawi zina zimakhala zovuta makamaka chifukwa mkazi amadziwa bwino nonse awiri. Komanso chifukwa ndi kuyesa kuwulula chilichonse kwa iye kuti adziwe kuti njoka yamusangalatsa bwanji pachifuwa. Musati muchite izi.
Njira: yikhalani kukhala anthu amalingaliro, samasani "chinthu" kuyanjano.
Kusunga chirichonse kungathe kukhala ubale weniweni pakati pa inu ndi mwamuna wokondedwa wa bwenzi lanu. Ndibwino kwambiri ngati muli ndi zofanana ndi mwamuna wake. Izi zidzamupangitsa kusangalala kulankhulana popanda kudutsa malire. Mwa njirayi, ubwenzi wapamtima mu bukhuli ndi weniweni - inu, chabwino, mudzamvana wina ndi mzake, chifukwa sizongopanda kanthu kuti inu nonse muli pafupi kwambiri ndi mkazi yemweyo.
Pali zinthu zina zomwe zimakhala zosiyana ndi izi: Tinayamba kukonda naye poyamba, timadandaula, timanjenjemera, ndipo iye - bwana wokwatirana, wogwira ntchito kuntchito, mchimwene wa mnzako, woyandikana naye mdziko - akumanga maso ake, ndipo sachita mantha kuti atengepo kanthu . Chifukwa cha izi ndizimene zilipo kale, mantha. Apa ndi pamene mphindi imabwera pamene tiyeneranso kulingalira ngati tidzatenga mwamuna kapena kungowonana naye. Ndipo kokha ngati mukufunadi munthu, komanso, mwakonzeka kuti akukonzekeretseni kuti akwatiwe, muyenera kutenga njira zotsatirazi zogwiritsira ntchito "nkhondo".
Ngati mgwirizano m'banja uli wabwino, ngati zonse ziri zabwino komanso zosasunthika, mwamuna sangasiye mkazi wake paliponse, ndipo, mosakayikira, sangasokoneze ubwenzi wanu ndi inu. Choncho, simungathe kukhumudwa ndikuganiza kuti mukuyesera kumanga chimwemwe chanu pavuto la wina. Ndipo mbali inayo, muyenera kudziwa momwe mungayankhire pokana. Choncho, kuyamba ndi kumvetsetsa, ngati banja lake ndi losalimba ngati mukufuna kuganiza.
Posachedwapa, ndi ndondomeko iyi yomwe imakhala yotchuka kwambiri ndi amayi osakwatiwa: adasankha yekha, amugoneka pabedi, adakwatiwa. Pa nthawi yomweyi ndinagula mphatso kuchokera kwa ine (nthawi zambiri - ndinamukoka iye kumsitolo ndikumuwaza chala chake: "Ndikufuna mphete iyi ndi diamondi ndi thumba").
Sikuti aliyense amakonda izo, koma zimagwira bwino mtundu wa amuna "ng'ombe-yani-yani", yomwe imayenera kulamuliridwa ndi mkazi - pafupifupi, pafupifupi.
"Bull pa chingwe" ukhoza iwe momwemo kumutsogolera kutali - wamng'ono ndi wamwano.
Kwadziwika kale kuti iyi ndi njira yabwino kwambiri yolimbana nayo. Uthenga waukulu: "O, ine ndifooka kwambiri ndipo sindingathe kuthandizira, ndikusowa munthu wamphamvu pafupi naye amene angateteze, kuthandizira, kuthandizira, koma osati iye." Inde, ayi, wokondedwa? ". Kuti mphamvu zathu zili m'kufooka kwathu, Shakespeare adati kale. Ndipo ife timamukhulupirira iye. Komanso, moyo umatsimikizira kuti ndi wabwino.
Njira imeneyi imagwira ntchito nthawi zonse, ngakhale ndi amuna omwe ali ndi zaka zambiri, omwe sali okondwa kukhala olimba, pafupifupi onse amphamvu.
Malinga ngati n'kotheka, musalole munthuyo kumvetsetsa kuti mukufunadi kukwatira. Iye ayenera kuyamba "kutenga nawo mbali" mu njira ya chipulumutso chako chamuyaya ndi kumvetsa kuti iwe udzangowonongeka popanda iye.
Masewerawa amakhala pafupi nthawi zonse . N'zosangalatsa kwa amuna amphamvu, odziimira okha, kuyamikira kuseketsa ndi kuyendetsa galimoto, akazi achikondi komanso amphamvu.
Ndidzanena nthawi yomweyo - awa akuimira kugonana mwamphamvu sizambiri. Ndipo njira iyi yogonjetsa malo awo ndi yovuta kwambiri, imafuna nthawi zonse kukonza mawu, muyenera kukhala ochenjera nthawi zonse. Ngati simukumva mphamvu yakusewera nthawi zonse, musayambe. Kupambana kwakukulu kumadalira momwe masewerawa amatha kusiyanitsira chibwenzi chake chamakono komanso momwe mumagwirira ntchito bwino kuposa momwe amachitira.
Musatengeke ndi chilakolako chogonjetsa, muyenera kukhalabe ofooka pang'ono, nthawi zonse mutaya udindo womaliza mu nkhondo, ngati simungayambe kutero - zikhoza kuopseza mphamvu yanu. Koma pa nthawi imodzimodziyo sayenera kumverera kuti mukusewera naye pompano.
Kuchokera pamaganizo - mwamuna "ndi wa" mkazi yemwe ali ndi chiyanjano chonse chogonana, chomwe chimakondweretsa komanso chimakhutiritsa. Mzimayi yemwe amacheza ndi munthu nthawi zonse - mwachidziwitso, mkazi wake - mosasamala kanthu za kukhalapo kwa sitampu pasipoti kapena kugwira ntchito palimodzi limodzi. Ngati, ngakhale, palibe kugonana ndi mkazi wovomerezeka, kapena zimachitika kawirikawiri ndipo sakhala wokhutira, ndiye kuti, winayo, ndiye kuti ndiye mkazi weniweni, mkazi weniweni. Ngati munthu amatha kulankhula pamgedi mosiyana ndi wina kapena mzake, ponena za thupi - iye ndi mitala.
Akazi omwe akwatirana, nthawi zambiri amamasuka ndikukhazikika - onse, cholinga chikukwaniritsidwa, "tsopano ali wanga." Komabe, mwamunayo, mosasamala kanthu kuti anali ndi chikondi chotani ndi ofesi yolembera, atakwatirana, nayenso, amatsitsimutsa. Patapita nthawi, amayamba kufotokozera mkazi wake momasuka ngati mdzakazi (mwamuna yemwe mumagawana naye pakhomo panu ndi moyo), poipa kwambiri - monga zosavuta (kapena zosavuta). Mungapewe izi mwa njira imodzi yokha: musamaganizire kapena kukonda mwamuna wanu wokondedwa ku gulu la "mwamuna". Ndipo tifunikira kukumbukira: mwamuna amatha nthawi zonse ndi mkazi yemwe amatha kuganiza bwino, kuphatikizapo pabedi.