Momwe mungakhazikitsire ubale ndi mwamuna wake pamphepete mwa chisudzulo - Malangizo a maganizo awa adzakupatsani chisangalalo cha banja

Mavuto okhudzana ndi maubwenzi amapezeka ngakhale mabanja omwe amakhala okondweretsa kwambiri. Ndipo amatha kupulumuka bwinobwino, ngati okwatirana pokhazikitsa kuthetsa mikangano ndikupangana mogwirizana. Koma ubale woterewu ndi umunthu wokhwima, omwe ali ndi udindo wofanana ndi chikondi chobadwira pamodzi, ndi ochepa kwambiri. Ambiri sangathe kukhala ndi udindo wa kumverera komwe kumayenera kukwezedwa, kukonzedwa, kuphunzitsidwa monga mwana wamng'ono, ndi kuchiritsidwa, ndipo osaphedwa, "akadwala." Kusudzulana ndi matenda opatsirana, omwe amavomereza chikondi cha abambo.

Nchifukwa chiyani chigamulochi chikuwonjezeka kwambiri m'mabanja amakono? Ndi mtundu wanji wa njira zopanda pake zothetsera vuto la maubwenzi? Pang'ono, kungosudzulana! Ngati pali kusiyana kulikonse, ndi zolakwa zonse zomwe zimapangidwa, pongopikisana, mopitirira ndi kunja, okwatirana amaopsezana ndi chisudzulo. Pofuna kuthetsa njirayi, mikangano ya m'banja ili ngati quenching moto ndi mafuta. Inde, posakhalitsa, okwatiranawa amapezeka kuti ali pafupi kwambiri ndi chibwenzi. Ndipo ngati pali mwayi wochepa wopulumutsa banja ndi kupulumutsa "mwana" wamba wotchedwa Chikondi kuchokera ku imfa yapamtima, ndiye pitani ku bizinesi pomwepo!

Kodi tikuchita chiyani cholakwika ndipo n'chifukwa chiyani tatsala pang'ono kuthetsa banja?

Akatswiri a zamaganizo amasiyanitsa zizindikiro zingapo, maonekedwe omwe amasonyeza mavuto mu ubale. Kunyalanyaza mavuto awa ndi njira yopewera yosamvana:

1. Mikangano yowopsya. Ziribe kanthu momwe maanja amayesetsa kuthana ndi mavuto a m'banja pakakhala zochitika, panthawi ya moyo pamodzi, zifukwa zomwe zimayambitsa mikangano zikuwonjezeka ndi kukula. Pamene pali zonena zovuta kufotokoza kwa wokondedwa m'diso, koma kwenikweni mukufuna kunena mnzanu ku khitchini, ichi ndi chizindikiro choyamba choopsya chaukwati. Kusasunthika "kusasunthika" posakhalitsa kumakhala chisokonezo choipa. Ziphuphu zimakula!
2. Zosatha zosatha. Kawirikawiri, okwatirana amatsana wina ndi mzake ndi ndemanga ndi zotsutsana, osasamala kwenikweni zomwe zanenedwa. Ngati mwamunayo sanasambe kapu (sanayeretse masokosi, sanatsegule babu, etc.), mwinamwake mmalo modandaula monga: "Kodi mungakhale nkhumba bwanji?" Ndikofunika kuleza mtima, popanda kutengeka ( ngakhale ngati kwa zaka zana) afunseni kuti: "Wokondedwa, sungani, chonde, ndi chikho changa." Zolankhula Zosatha - kunyoza, kukulira mwachinsinsi. Kutsutsidwa kumabweretsa!
3. Kutsutsa kawirikawiri. Kudzudzula ndi muvi wotulutsidwa pa kudzidalira kwa munthu. Mwinamwake, zokhuza, ndizovomerezeka, koma nthawi zonse mawonekedwe ake amavala, zimapangitsa kukhala ndi mwayi wopeza mwamuna kapena mkazi wake. Ngati cholinga cha muvi ndicho kuvulaza wokondedwa wanu osati kubweretsa vuto lenileni, ndiye kuti ndibwino kumukwapula. Kutsutsa kokakamiza kuyenera kufotokozedwa mwa mawonekedwe a pempho, ndipo nthawizonse ngati mawonekedwe a chinthu, osati munthu. Zolemba zogwira mtima zikuwonjezeka!

4. Chiwonetsero cha kunyansidwa. Kupyolera kunyoza, kunyoza momveka bwino kwa wokondedwayo kumawonetseredwa. Kutchuka kosadziŵika, chithandizo chodzikuza, kunyalanyaza malingaliro, mawu osatha, kunyoza ndi kunyoza kumapangitsa munthu kudzimva wopanda pake ndi wopanda phindu. Kudzudzula kukuphatika!
5. Kusayamika. "Zikomo" komanso "zikomo" ndi mawu awiri omwe amalemera kwambiri monga "chikondi". Iwo, ngati zizindikilo za chidwi ndi zothokoza, amaika liwu la ubale, ndipo kusakhala kwawo kusandulika chikondi kukhala "mgwirizano". Zolinga zomwe timachita mwa kukakamiza (zathu kapena kunja), koma chisamaliro choona ndi ntchito zabwino ndizowonetseratu zokha. Mawu oyamikira ndizochinsinsi chake. Kupusa kwa moyo kukuphatika!
6. Kunyalanyaza kugonana. Kugonana kawirikawiri kapena kusowa kwacho ndi chifukwa chachikulu chokhalira osudzulana, ngakhale kuti mwamunayo sanena kuti ndi chifukwa chomveka. Ngati mmodzi mwa anthu okwatirana sagonana, ndiye kuti akhoza "kutembenuka" kufunika kwathunthu kwa mbali iyi ya moyo. Kwa mabanja ambiri, cholepheretsa choterechi ndi chosatheka. Kusakhutitsidwa kumabweretsa!

Otsutsa ena ndi ena omwe amatha kusudzulana ali ndi chuma chokwanira, ndipo amatha kukhala otetezera banja losatetezeka.

Kupewa kusudzulana

Joanna Goddard, yemwe ndi wolemba mabuku wa ku New York, yemwe amadziwika bwino kwambiri, amauza anthu mamiliyoni ambiri olemba mabukuwo, koma amalimbikitsa kwambiri zomwe zimalimbikitsa maubwenzi m'banja. Malinga ndi zomwe adanena, kwa nthawi yaitali ukwati umakhala wosangalala ndi zosavuta komanso zooneka ngati zosafunikira. Komabe, kusunga kwawo sikulola aliyense kuganiza za kusudzulana.

1. Musakhumudwitsidwe pa zinthu zazing'ono. Moyo ndi waufupi kwambiri kuti usakhumudwitsidwe mukamangokhalira kudandaula ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wake, pamene sakuvutika maganizo, pamene akudwala komanso sakufuna kuwona wina aliyense, pamene akuvutika ndi ntchitoyo ndipo wayamba kuchokera kumapeto kwa nyumba. Sikoyenera kumvetsetsa zofooka zaumunthu kuti tipewe mtima. Musalole zopempha zazing'ono, koma mutengere banja mu chizolowezi chopempha chikhululuko, pamene maganizo okhumudwitsa apitirira.
2. Onetsetsani malamulo a ulemu. Kuchita manyazi kumatsegulira zitseko zambiri, ndi kulemekeza pakati pa okwatirana - kumatsegula mitima kukumana. Mawu oyamikira, zopempha molemekeza, kuyamikira ndi kuyamikira moona mtima kungathe kukonzanso mgwirizano pakati pa banja pamapeto pa kusudzulana.
3. Ikani bedi palimodzi. Musangoganizira zofuna zabwino, komanso muzipeza nthawi yogona musanagone, kuti mukambirane zimene zinachitika tsikuli. Awuzeni "nthano" usiku, monga momwe mumachitira kwa ana. Mulole izo zikhale ndi zochitika zanu, zosangalatsa kapena mantha. Muli chinachake chomwe chimakhudza mwana, wachikondi ndi wachikondi. Ndipo onetsetsani kuti mupsompsone musanagone komanso m'mawa!

4. Nenani "Ndimakukondani" pamene mukukangana. Banja loyenera silikutanthauza banja popanda mikangano. Kupeza chiyanjano kumakulolani kufunafuna ndi kupeza choonadi, kumva ululu wina ndi mzake. Koma ndikofunika kuti ngakhale pamakangano okwatirana amvetse kuti akupitiliza kukonda, ngakhale kulira kwakukulu. Kunena pakati pa mkangano "Ndimakukondani!" Sikophweka, koma pamene maganizo amatha, mudzadziyamikira nokha chifukwa cha mawu awa. Yesani!
5. Sakanizani dongosolo lokhazikitsidwa. Musaiwale kudzaza banja lanu mwachidwi. Palibe chowonadi chopha maubwenzi, monga chizoloŵezi. Yesani chinthu chachilendo ndi chatsopano, pangani zochitika zodziphatikizana, ndikuwonetseni maganizo osadziwika bwino. Pitani ku malo odyera atsopano, kusintha maulendo okongola a chilimwe paulendo wa msasa ndi mahema, khalani ndi mwambo wopita ku mafilimu, kuwonetserako ndikukonzekera zakudya zosayenera zachikondi.
6. Siyani malo kwa wina ndi mzake. Kukhala maola 24 pamodzi kungakhale koyenera, koma osati masiku 365 pachaka. Aliyense amafunika kukhala yekhayekha, ufulu komanso ngakhale yekha: pamene muyenera kumverera moyo wanu, yesetsani kulingalira mu malingaliro anu, khalani chete. Izi ndi zachilendo! Siyani malo anu omwe, dzipatseni nokha ndi mnzanu nthawi zina kuti mukumane ndi abwenzi kapena kupatula nthawi yanu yokonda kujambula popanda kuyankha.

Mmene angakhalire ndi chibwenzi ndi mwamuna wake, ngati akadali pachibwenzi

Kupewa, zomwe zimalimbikitsa chiyanjano cha banja, zimanyalanyazidwa, ndipo maanja amalingalira mgwirizano mu chiyanjano kukhala chodziwikiritsa chodziwika kwa chikondi, banja limangoyenda nthawi yopuma. Nthawi zina anthu okwatirana amatha kusintha udindo wawo kuti azitha kukonzanso okha. Kukhoza kumvetsera ndi kumvetsera wokondedwa, kupanga zosokoneza, kuyembekezera zovuta, kupereka popanda kuumirira mofanana - uwu ndi ntchito yabwino, yogwirizana, ndi nthawi. Kuti mutengenso mgwirizano wa imfa, zidzatengera khama kwambiri, koma chofunika kwambiri - chikondi!

1. Vomerezani zolakwitsa. Mikangano yonse ya banja ikukula mogwirizana ndi ndondomekoyi: "Ndili bwino! Inu simunatero! "Amayi akuda nkhawa ndi kupeza yankho kwa funso lakale:" Ndi ndani amene ayenera kulakwa? ". Koma kuganizira za vuto lomwe limabwera ndilo funso lina: "Ndiyenera kuchita chiyani?" Ndipo pokhapokha ndikukambirana ndi kufufuza wolakwa. Maubwenzi ogwirizana m'banja sasowa kulungamitsidwa. Zokwanira kuvomereza nthawi yomwe mukulakwitsa, mukulakwitsa kapena mukulakwitsa. Tengani udindo pa zochitika zawo zosayenera, pemphani moona mtima chikhululukiro ndikupereka ufulu kwa wokondedwa kuti achite kapena kukhululuka.
2. Kuthanizani kudzikonda kosayenera. Muyenera kuvomereza kuti munthu wapafupi ndi munthu, ndipo ali ndi ufulu kukhala opanda ungwiro, monga anthu onse. Palibe anthu abwino! Mfundo yakuti ukwati umatha chifukwa cha chiwonongeko chanu chachikulu chidzasonyezedwa ndi zizindikiro zotsatirazi:
   • chidziwitso (kudzikonzekera pawekha);
   • kunyada;
   • mgwirizano wosagwirizana;
   • kutsutsa;
   • chotsutsa;
   • kusautsika;
   • kunyada;
   • mkwiyo;
   • kusokoneza, ndi zina zotero.

3. Chitanipo kanthu. Ngati mwakhala mukusokoneza, osati nthawi yoyamba (zikuwoneka, osati nthawi yachiwiri, ngati mwasudzulana), yesetsani kuchita zachilendo kwa inu, zomwe mukufuna kupempha chikhululuko. Mawu a kupepesa ndi malonjezano sakufuna, chifukwa anthu samakhulupirira mawu, koma amachita. Amawathandiza kuti akhulupirire, akhululukireni, ayambeni ndi slate yoyera.
4. Khululukirani ndi kumasulidwa. Sikuti nthawi zonse chiyanjano chiyenera kubwezeretsedwa, ndipo nthawi zonse sichiyenera kupulumutsidwa. Pali nthawi pamene anthu achita ntchito mu moyo wa banja lawo komanso kukhalabe ndi maganizo omwe akhala akufa kale - ndikuchita zolakwa zawo za tsogolo lawo komanso munthu amene ali nawo. Lolani kupita kamodzi wokondedwa ndi wokondedwa mwamuna, ngati njira zonse zopezera chimwemwe zakhala zikuyesedwa. Koma chitani ndi chiyamiko, popanda kunyozedwa ndi kudziimba mlandu. Mukhululukireni iye ndi inu nokha chifukwa cha chikondi chosweka. Mumumasule iye ndi mkhalidwewo. Ndipo, nkotheka kwambiri kuti chochita choterocho chidzakhala mwayi wachiwiri wa banja lanu losokonezeka.