Masiku ano, banja lachiwerewere ndilofala pakati pa achinyamata ambiri achinyamata. Kotero iwo amayang'ana ubale wawo asanakwatirane mwalamulo. Panthawiyi akuyesera kutsogolera banja limodzi ndikugawana moyo. Kawirikawiri othandizira maukwati apachiweniweni ndi amuna. Azimayi akufuna banja lachibadwa, lodziwika bwino, akufuna kukhala ndi chidaliro m'tsogolo. Ndipotu, pamene maubwenzi osadziwika sakudziwa momwe ubale umakhalira pambuyo pa kubadwa kwa mwana, pali kuthekera kuti mkazi akhoza kukhala yekha ndi mwana wake komanso popanda chithandizo chilichonse. Ngakhale kuti banja lolembedwera ndilokwanira kuti liwonetsere chikwati chaukwati ndi omwe alibe malipiro ochepa kapena omwe sanagwiritsepo ntchito adzakhala ndi ufulu wothandizira zakuthupi ngati pali ana wamba kapena chifukwa cha umoyo.
Kodi n'zotheka kuganizira ukwati wadziko kuti ukhale wodzaza? Zimadalira mbali yomwe mungayang'ane. Ngati kuchokera kumbali ya lamulo, inde, izo zimatengedwa ngati choncho. Monga ngati banjali ligawanika, palibe katundu wa banja omwe adzagawidwe. Koma ngakhale panopa, posachedwa, ku Russia kunali ntchito ngati mgwirizano wa banja. Mu mgwirizano wa banja, mungathe kufotokozera maudindo omwe apatsidwa kwa mwanayo ngati mwanayo atabadwa, momwe katunduyo adzaperekere pamene abambowa achoka, ndi zonse zomwe mukufuna. Chigwirizano cha banja chimagwira ntchito atatchulidwa ndi notary. Mgwirizano woterewu unabwera kuchokera ku mayiko a kumadzulo kwa Ulaya, koma ku Russia sikufala kwambiri, komabe tingathe kunena kuti ndi awiri okhawo omwe amagwiritsira ntchito ntchitoyi pamene anali pachikwati cha boma.
Ngati mukuyang'ana mkhalidwewo ndi malingaliro abwino? Amuna ambiri amadziona okha kukhala omasuka mu ubale umenewu, koma kodi amasintha chinachake akasintha? Pokhapokha mutakhala ndi chiyanjano, simungathe kupweteka! Ayi ndithu! Mumakhalanso ndi moyo pa malo amodzi, kugona pabedi limodzi, kuchita ntchito zapakhomo komanso zambiri zomwe mumachita monga banja. Choncho, kuchokera kumbali iyi ukwati ukhoza kuonedwa ngati wangwiro.
Ziwerengero zimasonyeza kuti amuna ambiri omwe ali pachikwati chaboma amadziona okha osakwatira, ndipo amayi ambiri mosiyana, amadziona okha okwatira. Amakhulupiliranso kuti anthu amaganiza mozama za kubereka kuposa akazi, koma izi siziri choncho. Mu ubale weniweni, mwamuna amakhalanso ndi chibadwa chosiya ana. Koma muukwati waumwini, nthawi zambiri kuposa iwo, samaganizira ngakhale za ana.
Akatswiri a zamaganizo amanena kuti muukwati waumwini, okwatirana amakangana koposa muukwati wa boma. Chifukwa cha ichi ndi mkazi. Popeza akufuna kuti akhale wolimba, akufunafuna kukongola kwa dzanja ndi mtima, akufuna zovala zoyera komanso ukwati. Ndipo chifukwa cha udindo wake, amatsutsa mwachindunji mkanganowo, amakhala akukangana nthawi zambiri pa nkhaniyi. Kotero chimodzimodzi, ukwati wa boma umatengedwa kuti ndi wotsika?
Kukhala m'banja lovomerezeka, mungaphunzire ubwino wina: simukufunikira kugwiritsa ntchito ndalama pazokwatira, mphete, nthawi yachisanu, kavalidwe. Ndipo "okwatirana" omwe ali ndi udindo ali osachepera wina ndi mzake kusiyana ndi ukwati wa boma.
Eya, pamene banja, pazifukwa zina silingathe kukhazikitsa ubale wawo tsopano ndikufuna kukhala ndi moyo pang'ono popanda kujambula, dziyang'ane nokha m'banjamo, yesetsani nokha, yesani moyo wanu wa kugonana. Chabwino, ngati mukukhala m'banja lachimuna ndipo chilakolako chimenechi sichibwereranso, sichidzabweretsa chirichonse kupatula kusakhutitsidwa, kukangana ndi kuwonetseratu kwamuyaya kwa ubalewu.
Ganizirani bwino, kodi mukufunikira izi, mukufunikira "ma check" oterewa. Pambuyo pake, agogo ndi agogo athu monga momwe adachitira popanda izo ndipo amakhala moyo wokondwa komanso wokondwa.