Rabindranath Tagore adati: "Ukwati ndi luso, ndipo umayenera kukhala watsopano tsiku lililonse." Chikwati chimodzi chimawoneka ngati chizoloŵezi, ena amazindikira kuti ndi chinthu chamtengo wapatali komanso choyera. Onse awiri akukwatirana ndikutsatira mwambo umenewu ku mibadwomibadwo. Koma ndi chifukwa chiti chothetsa mavuto ambiri? Nchifukwa chiyani maukwati "amawotchedwa" ndipo anthu amasiya maubwenzi omwe apangidwa kwa nthawi yaitali, komanso maloto mwa iwo? Kodi ndi zotani zomwe zimayambitsa chisudzulo?
Ndipotu, kwa ambiri, ukwati ndi wopatulika, tchuthi komanso nthawi yomweyo mtolo wa moyo, ngakhale kuti nthawi zonse zimatiwoneka kuti chikondi chosatha ndi kulankhulana pakati pathu ziyenera kukhala kwamuyaya. Koma nthawi zambiri izi siziri choncho. Kodi chiwonongeko ichi chikugwirizana ndi chiyani, ndipo zimayambitsa zotani zothetsa banja? Chifukwa cha zomwe tikuchita sitepe yaikulu, ndipo n'chifukwa chiyani zimatitsogolera?
Milandu ya khoti nthawi zambiri lembani za kusiyana kwa zofuna monga chifukwa cha kusudzulana. Ndipotu izi sizikutanthauza cholinga chenicheni, chifukwa kwenikweni pali anthu osiyanasiyana omwe ali ndi zofuna zosiyana, koma chifukwa chake timaphunzira kukhala pamodzi, kumvetsetsa mnzathu. Apa chinthu chonsecho chiri chokhudzidwa ndi theka lace, pofufuza muzochita zake zokondweretsa ndikudzikonda yekha, pakutha kulandira munthu monga momwe alili. Ndiye zofuna za pola sizingakhale zovuta konse, mosiyana, ndizosangalatsa kuona dziko kupyolera mu maso ena ndikumverera ndi mtima wina, mukupeza nokha.
Chifukwa chimodzimodzi cha kukangana, zopweteka muukwati ndi kusudzulana kungakhale kusiyana pakati pa zaka khumi kapena kupitilira kwa mnzanuyo. Pankhaniyi, zimakhala zovuta kwambiri kumvetsera zofuna za wina kapena zina kuti zizimvetsetse, ndipo ndondomeko za moyo wa zaka zonsezi sizingagwirizane. Mavuto omwe amadza chifukwa cha kusiyana kwakukulu akhoza kukhala ndi maganizo, kapena chikhalidwe kapena chikhalidwe. Koma, ngakhale zonsezi, maanja oterewa amathandizira banja lawo ndikukhala mosangalala kwa zaka zambiri. Ndiye ndi zifukwa ziti zomwe zidzakhala zofunika kwambiri?
Mwinamwake, chimodzi mwa zifukwa zazikulu zidzakhale kunyada ndi kusamvetsetsa. Zimalepheretsa munthu kuti asamalire banja lawo ndi banja lawo. Kudzikuza, kulephera kupanga malingaliro, tsankho, kungathe kusewera nkhanza nawe. Kutsutsana kulikonse kumatha kukulira kukhala chinthu china, kumakhala ndi zonyansa zambiri kwa wina ndi mzake. Pomwepo moyo umakhala wosatsutsika. Kukwanitsa kumvetsetsa munthu ndi kofunika kwambiri moti nthawi zina timadziwa kuti palibe. Chifundo, chikondi ndi ulemu - luso lofunika kwambiri, limene timatsogolera makhalidwe abwino, kulimbikitsa makhalidwe athu.
Kuti mupewe kusudzulana, m'pofunikanso kulingalira chifukwa chomwecho monga kulephera kuvomereza malo a wokondedwa. Ndikofunika kuti mumvetsere kwa mnzanuyo, mumuthandize m'njira iliyonse, athe kupereka ndi kupereka chikondi chanu. Nthawi zambiri anthu amakumana ndi vuto ngati kuti sangathe kufotokoza maganizo awo. Ndizofunikira kuphunzira kwa nthawi yaitali, kutseguka kudziko ndi mnzanu, yesetsani kutaya mantha anu onse ndi kudzikonda kwanu, pitirizani nokha. Pambuyo pake, palibe amene amafunikira munthu amene angangolandira chikondi, kudzipangira yekha komanso osakhoza kupereka kalikonse. Tonsefe timafuna kuti tiwone kuti timakonda, tenga zizindikiro za chidwi, ndikudziwa kuti mukufunikirabe.
Phunzirani kudzipangira nokha, kudzilandira ndi kupereka chikondi, kumvetsetsa mnzanuyo, amene angakhale wotsutsa. Choncho, mumachepetsa kwambiri chiopsezo cha kusudzulana ndikupangitsa moyo wanu kukhala wolimba.
Zowopsya kwambiri komanso nthawi yomweyo zifukwa zomvetsa chisoni zosudzulana ndi zachiwawa. Mwamwayi, nkhaniyi si ili kutali ndi ife kapena mayiko athu, ndipo mawonetseredwe a chiwawa nthawi zambiri, ndipo nthawi zambiri ndi obisika. Zifukwa zikuluzikulu ndizimene zimagwiritsidwa ntchito. Kusiyanitsa pakati pa kugwidwa maganizo, mwakuthupi, kugonana. Komanso kudziko la psychology ndi kubwera kwa telojiya kunalowa mu nthawi yatsopano - cybernetting, chiwawa cha cybernetic. Izi zikutanthawuza, mwachitsanzo, nkhanza zofanana zomwe sitingazigwiritse ntchito, koma kudzera m'mafilimu, kufalitsa kufalitsa zithunzi pa intaneti.
Chiwawa chikhoza kufotokozedwa ndi anthu opusa, anthu omwe ali ndi matenda a maganizo, komanso omwe akugwiritsidwa ntchito kuyambira ali ana. Nthawi zambiri zimachitika kuti sitingathe kudziwa momwe mnzathuyo atichitira pambuyo paukwati, kutsegulira kale mbali zonse za maganizo ndi khalidwe lake. Potero, tili ndi mavuto ndi chiwawa, onse omwe akuzunzidwa komanso anthu onse.
Chimodzi mwa zifukwa zomwe zimayambitsa chiwawa ndicho kumwa mowa, chomwecho ndi chifukwa chokhalira osudzulana. Tikawona kuti zizoloŵezi zoipa zimawonetsedwa mwa munthu amene timamukonda, timayesa zonse mwa kuyesetsa kwathu kumuthandiza, kukonza vutoli ... Koma zimachitika kuti munthu wokondedwa amatifera chifukwa cha kudalira, safuna kugwirizana ndi wina aliyense ndikutenga njira iliyonse, kuti muchikonze nokha. Amatembenuka kukhala munthu wosiyana, kusintha khalidwe lake, kutaya umunthu wake wakale.
Zomvetsa chisoni, koma zinthu zosiyana zimachitika, mulimonsemo, nkoyenera kulimbana ndi chisangalalo chanu ndi kudzigwira nokha. Nthawi zina kusudzulana n'kofunika, ndipo kupezeka kwake sikukutanthauza kuti moyo wanu sungakhoze bwino.
Momwe simukuwopa kusagwirizana maganizo ndi mnzanu, kusiyana kwakukulu kwa zaka, malingaliro osiyana ndi malingaliro pa moyo - chifukwa cha chikondi chenicheni palibe zolepheretsa. Pamaso pa chikondi, ndi zophweka kuthana ndi mavuto ndi mavuto alionse, kuchotsa kumoyo ngakhale kusayambika kwapakati pa maganizo omwe amachititsa kusudzulana.
Choncho, chikondi ndi kukondedwa, kondani ndi kukondana, kondwerani zokondweretsa zonse zaukwati, zikhale zangwiro ndi inu nokha, chifukwa mgwirizano wa anthu awiri ndi luso lomwe liyenera kuphunzitsidwa tsiku ndi tsiku, ndipo chikondi, monga Chekhov adanena, ndicho chofunika kwambiri pa moyo wa banja.