Mnzanu amene akusowa thandizo sasiya, sangafunse chinthu choyipa, ndizo zoona, bwenzi lokhulupirika limatanthauza ... Mawu awa ochokera mu nyimbo ya ana akufotokoza lingaliro lalikulu lomwe limagwirizana ndi lingaliro la "ubwenzi". Koma ubwenzi ndi wosiyana.
Ngati abwenzi ali okoma, izi zimapangitsa ulemu, ubwenzi wa chikazi umayambitsa chidwi, koma ngati mwamuna ndi mkazi ali abwenzi, izi zimayambitsa kudana, mantha, nthawi zina ngakhale mkwiyo. Kuposa momwe zimayambira ndipo chifukwa chake "ayi", tiyeni timvetse limodzi.
Choyamba, lingaliro loti "ubwenzi" kwa abambo ndi amai liri ndi tanthauzo losiyana.
Ngati bwenzi lachikazi limatanthauza kukhulupirirana, ndiko kuti, amayi amakonda kukondana wina ndi mnzake, kupereka uphungu, kukambirana osati amayi okha, komanso mitu ya amuna, ndiye kuti abwenzi amuna amachokera pamchitidwe - amuna samakonda kuwoneka ofooka, iwo, Momwemo, sanena zambiri, ndi kosavuta kuti iwo achite. Kumbukirani, kodi nthawi zambiri mumawona munthu akuyankhula pa foni ndi bwenzi lake kwa ola limodzi kapena kuposa? Kapena anthu omwe akukamba za msonkhano wotsatira mpira?
Chachiwiri, zozizwitsa, monga zong'onoting'ono, zimakhala zamphamvu m'malingaliro athu. Kukhala paubwenzi pakati pa anthu omwe amagonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha kumamveka kwa ife, zovomerezeka, chodabwitsa ichi ndi chachibadwa. Inde, kuthekera kwa ubale pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi ndi koonekeratu, sikungapewe, chifukwa uli ndi malo oti ukhale. Funso lina ndilo chifukwa chake amuna ena amafuna kukhala pa ubwenzi ndi mkazi kumbali, ndipo amai amakonda kugawana nawo maganizo awo ndi zochitika zawo ndi mwamuna wamwamuna, ndikumuganizira moona mtima ngati bwenzi lake?
Zinthu ndi zomveka komanso zosaoneka ngati banja liri pambali ina. Amzanga nthawi zambiri amapereka ife chinachake, mwatsoka, banja silingathe kupereka: mwachitsanzo, tikhoza kuyankhula nawo pa nkhani zomwe banja lavotera. Nkhanizi nthawi zambiri zimakhudza ife nthawi zonse, zosayenera, zomwe timamva komanso zomwe takumana nazo. Mwachitsanzo, mwamuna saganizira ngakhale kumuuza mkazi kuti amakonda mkazi wina, kapena kuti wataya ndalama zambiri mu casino, ndipo nthawi zina amavomereza kwa mkazi wake komanso anthu omwe ali pafupi kuti akudwala. Kotero zimakhala zovuta kuti mayi auze mwamuna wake kuti kugonana kwawo kwakhala kovuta kapena kuti akufuna kukhala yekha.
Mtundu woterewu, kwa mwamuna ndi mkazi, umabereka ubale wosiyana, kumene kumvetsetsa kwa anthu omwe akuwonekera kuti ndi "akunja" kumacheza ndi abwenzi enieni. Ndipo izi sizowopsa: ndithudi, anthu akhoza kuchita chinachake kwa wina ndi mzake, koma sagawana zinsinsi. Amasiya maganizo awo amkati kwa amayi awo. Ndipo sikuti nthawi zonse mkazi uyu akutembenuka kuti akhale mkazi wake.
Kwa abwenzi abambo, amai akhoza kutembenukira "m'mphepete mwachangu" mwa chikhalidwe cha akazi, kuti awaululire zomwe amadzibisa kwa abwenzi ake. Katswiri wina wa zachikhalidwe, dzina lake Lilian Rubin, anati: "Pa ubwenzi uliwonse wa mwamuna ndi mkazi, kugonana kumabisika kwinakwake, kumapangitsa kuti ubwenzi umenewu ukhale wokongola komanso wokondweretsa, koma ambiri mwa amuna ndi akazi amavomereza kuti kukhala pachibwenzi ndi chiopsezo chachikulu ubwenzi, chifukwa kugonana kumayambitsa chikhumbo chokhala nacho, chomwe sichigwirizana ndi ubwenzi. " Osati mnzanu aliyense wabwino angakhale wokondedwa. Amuna ndi akazi ena amatha kugwirizanitsa bwino ubale ndi chisangalalo, komabe abwenzi ambiri ogonana mosiyana amapewa mwayi umenewu nthawi zonse.
Ubwenzi weniweni tsopano ndi wosafunika, dzifunseni funso losavuta: Kodi anzanu abwino kwambiri ndani? Ndikutsimikiza kuti yankholo likutipangitsa ife kuyembekezera, chifukwa timapereka tanthawuzo lotanthauzira tanthauzo la mawu oti "ubwenzi". Ubwenzi sungakhoze kugawidwa malingana ndi chiwerewere, anthu omwe timawaona kuti abwenzi ndi oyenerera, koma ngati n'zosatheka.