Kawirikawiri amakhulupirira kuti kugonana ndi gawo la achinyamata 18-30. Pa zaka izi, abambo ndi amai amagonana nthawi zonse, kukhutiritsa zosowa zawo zakuthupi. Mabanja omwe ali ndi chizolowezi chogonana, ayang'ane mbali zomwe zimagwirizana komanso zosangalatsa. Koma kodi chimachitika bwanji pa msinkhu wokalamba kwambiri? Kawirikawiri, patatha pafupifupi zaka 50, moyo wokhudzana ndi kugonana umatha kapena kumatha palimodzi. Ndipo zopanda pake! Choncho akatswiri a mayiko otukuka padziko lapansi amaganizira.
Phunziro linachitidwa, pomwe moyo wa chiwerewere wa anthu 200 wa zaka 60 unayang'aniridwa. Zinatsimikiziridwa kuti iwo omwe anali ndi chizoloŵezi chogonana nthawi zonse anali ndi nzeru zowonjezereka bwino ndi kukumbukira bwino kusiyana ndi otsutsa awo otsutsana ndi chiwerewere. Ndipo anthu opitirira zaka makumi asanu ndi awiri (75) adakhutitsidwa ndi moyo wawo wa chiwerewere kuposa anthu a zaka 60. Kotero asayansi anadza kumapeto kuti anthu okalamba akhoza ndipo ayenera kukhala nawo nthawi zonse kugonana. Izi zimapangitsa kuti munthu azikumbukira nthawi yaitali ndikukhala ndi thanzi labwino.
Mosiyana ndi zosiyana
Anthu athu sagonana akakalamba, osati chifukwa sangathe kapena sakufuna. Ndizoti sitimavomereza, ndizochititsa manyazi. Akatswiri amanenanso kuti chilakolako cha kugonana ndi luso logonana, ngakhale kuti pang'onopang'ono amalephera, koma alibe malire omveka bwino. Malingana ndi momwe moyo waumunthu uliri ndi khalidwe lake, kugonana kungakhale kosiyana kwambiri. Anthu ena okwatirana amasunga ubale wapamtima komanso kumapeto kwa zaka za kalendala, chifukwa cha thupi labwino lonse.
Malingaliro ofala akuti mu ukalamba mkazi amalephera kukwanilitsa kugonana chifukwa cha kusamba, alibe mankhwala. Zoonadi, kusintha kwakukulu kumakhudza kugonana. Choncho, kusowa kwa mahomoni azimayi kumabweretsa kuuma kwa abambo, zomwe nthawi zina zimaletsa kugonana komanso zimayambitsa zowawa. Komabe, nkhaniyi ndi yokonzeka mosavuta - pali kusankha kwakukulu ndi mafuta mu msika wamakono. Chinthu china ndi chakuti anthu achikulire amangochita manyazi kukaona malo ogonana.
Kwa amuna omwe ali ndi zaka zambiri, chilakolako cha kugonana chimachepa pang'onopang'ono, kuyambira pachisanu ndi chimodzi (nthawi zina ngakhale chachisanu ndi chiwiri) zaka khumi za moyo. Vutoli ndilokhakha. Izi, mwatsoka, zimakhala zovuta ndi matenda osiyanasiyana osiyanasiyana. Pachifukwa ichi dokotala amangofunikira chabe. Koma amuna ambiri amaopa kutembenukira kwa akatswiri omwe ali ndi mavutowa. Choncho, chisamaliro ndi chithandizo cha mkazi wokondedwa sizidzangomuthandiza kuti azikhala ndi ulemu wake wamwamuna, komanso amakhalitsa thanzi lake labwino.
Zizindikiro za kugonana ukalamba
Kugonana mu ukalamba uli ndi mbali ziwiri za ndalama. Zimathandiza munthu kumverera ngati wamng'ono, kubweretsa adrenaline zambiri komanso maganizo abwino. Komabe, kugonana kumalimbikitsanso mphamvu zambiri kuti ziwonongeke, zomwe zimaphatikizapo katundu waukulu kwa mtima, mitsempha ya magazi ndi ubongo. Otsatira kwa anthu okalamba, makamaka kwa amuna, akhoza kukhala owopsa kwambiri. Mphamvu ya chisangalalo imathandiza kwambiri pambali imeneyi. Ngati wachikulire ayamba kukondana ndi mkazi wosadziwika, amakondwera kwambiri. N'zosadabwitsa kuti mgwirizano woterewu umatha mwachisoni. Komabe, panthawi yomwe okwatirana akhala akuzoloŵera zaka zambiri kwa wina ndi mzake, chisangalalo chimenechi sichikuchitika. Choncho chiopsezo chokhala ndi thanzi labwino ndi nthawi zina.
Kugonana, ngakhale kuti ndi mbali ya moyo wa anthu okalamba, komabe kumakhala kochepa. Anthu a msinkhu wozama kwambiri amayamikira chikondi ndi chisamaliro cha wokondedwa wawo, chisangalalo choyankhulana ndi chikondi cha kukhala pamodzi. Kugwirizana kwa uzimu koteroko kumalimbikitsa mgwirizano ndi chikondi pakati pa okalamba, ndipo nthawi zambiri kugonana ndi moyo kwa onse awiri!