Kunja nyumba zachifumu ndi ntchito zapakhomo, panalibe maukwati otere, koma kuyambira zaka khumi ndi zisanu ndi zinayi mpaka khumi ndi zisanu, atsikanawo anali atatengedwa kale kuti ndi "akazi owonjezera". Ndipotu, kuyamba kwa msungwana kwa mtsikanayo kunakula msinkhu, pamene msungwanayo adatha kutenga pakati ndikupempha. Maukwati oyambirira pakati pa anyamata anali ochepa, koma mnyamata wosakwatiwa wa zaka makumi awiri ndi zisanu anali kale "bobyl". Chifukwa chachikulu cha chikhumbo chimenechi ndilakalaka kusunga chiyero cha mkwatibwi wamtsogolo. Ndi mkwatibwi, chifukwa, monga Cossacks akuti: "Mwamuna ndi amene ali ndi udindo wambiri, ndipo mkaziyo ali ndi khalidweli." Pofuna kupeŵa mayesero osafunikira, mtsikanayo anaperekedwa.
Lero, maukwati oyambirira ndi ukwati wa zaka khumi ndi zisanu ndi zitatu. Kulankhula za ubwino ndi mavuto a maukwati oyambirira, ndikofunikira kupanga chisungidwe kuti chilichonse chimadalira banja. Kukhala ndi moyo m'zinthu zambiri kumatsimikizira kuti ukwatiwo udzakhala tsoka kapena udzakhala wokondwa kwa zaka zambiri.
Ukalamba ukhoza kukhala wofanana ndi ubwino ndi mavuto a maukwati oyambirira. Kusowa kwadzidzidzi kungachititse kuti achinyamata asankhe kukwatira chifukwa cha ena, ngakhale kukhala ndi chidwi cholimba, koma sangathe kuwonana. Ukwati wosavuta, ngati uli ndi malingaliro a chiwerengero, amatanthauza "auzimu", ndiko kuti, chikhalidwe cha zofuna, kukwanitsa kupeza chiyanjano, kulemekeza munthu - n'zotheka kwa munthu wokhwima. Kumbali ina, yowona, kukhulupirira mu chikondi ndi chikondi chosatha, mitima yaing'ono ingakhoze kulimbana ndi zowawa zambiri za tsogolo.
Muzinthu zambiri, zofooka zaukwati zimachokera pakulephera kusiyanitsa pakati pa chilakolako, chikondi ndi chikondi. Palibe okonda omwe sangalonjeze chikondi chosatha kwa wina ndi mzake, ndipo palibe chikondi chomwe chikanatha zaka zoposa zinayi. Ngati tiyang'ana kufunika kwa chiyanjano ndi awiri abwino, ndiye posachedwa, (alas, kale pali ana) ndipo mosakayikira munthu adzapeza chinthu chatsopano chokhumba kwambiri. Ndipo chilakolako chimatha.
Chikondi ndi chokongola, choyamba chiri makamaka, koma akadakali kutali ndi chikondi. Chikondi ndi mulungu wa banja, yemwe amatipatsa ife malonjezo. Ndipo bizinesi yathu ndi kukwaniritsa iwo pambuyo pake. Funsani okalamba omwe ali ndi moyo wosangalala ndipo mudzaphunzira kuti akuyenera kukhala osangalala ngakhale chikondi chakuda, kapena zochitika zapadera zapakati pazochitika. Ndipo kuti iwo ali okhulupirika, oleza mtima, achifundo, anthu abwino omwe amadziwa momwe angapezere chiyanjano, omwe ali ndi nzeru zambiri komanso amatha kuthetsa zilakolako zawo.
Chikondi, chikondi chenicheni, chilakolako chokhazikika, chobisala mumtima - chosagwira ntchito mafilimu ndi mabuku, kotero - chosagwirizana ndi lingaliro lachikhalidwe la "chikondi." Ngakhale kusintha kwa bukhu la Jane Austen la "Mind and Feelings", lomwe liwu lapamwamba lapamwamba pamtima wa mtima wosadziŵa limalemekezedwa, limatchulidwa pa malonda monga "kulimbana kwa mitima yokonda ndi makhalidwe abwino" pofuna kusonkhanitsa omvera m'mawonema. Tsoka, popanda "khalidwe loyeretsa" laukwati loyambirira lingathe kukhumudwitsa.
Mapindu a ukwati omwe anachitika pakati pa achinyamata ndi omwe akwatiwa:
- Ali ndi chikhumbo cholenga banja, amamvetsetsa udindo wake kwa wina ndi mzake ndipo safuna kugawana chimwemwe ndi bedi, koma chisoni, matenda, kusowa ndalama, moyo, mavuto olerera ana ndi mavuto ena a moyo wathu.
- Ndimagwirizana ndi makolo omwe ali ndi maphwando amodzi, ndipo makamaka - ndi awiriwo.
- Pali osachepera chaka chisanakwatirane! Osati tsiku lochepa!
Komanso, ngati kuchokera kumbali ya msungwana panalibe chidziwitso chogonana, ubwino wonsewu ukhoza kuchulukitsidwa ndi awiri. Ukwati woterewu ukhoza kukhala "wautali ndi wokondwa."
Zikanakhala kuti achinyamata adaganiza zokwatira, ngati:
- Iwo sangakhale moyo popanda wina ndi mzake, ndipo palibe aliyense padziko lonse, kupatula pa awiriwa, osowa (chimodzi mwa zifukwa zomveka zosudzulana mu zaka chimodzi kapena ziwiri kukhala limodzi).
- Iye "adawuluka".
- Ndikufuna kuchotsa chisamaliro cha makolo anga mwamsanga.
- Ndikufuna kukhala ndi msungwana pafupi ndi ine yemwe "amapereka".
Kuti nthawi zonse ukwati woterewu udzakhala woyesedwa kuti ukhale woyesedwa komanso wopambana mufunafuna kosatha kwa chisangalalo chosadziwika.
Chikondi chiyenera kuphunzira. Chikondi ndi ntchito. Chikondi sichiyenera kukhala, chiyenera kuphunzitsa ndi kusunga. Ndiyeno munthu amadziwa kuti ndi chinthu chokongola kwambiri m'moyo. Ndipotu kwenikweni, chifukwa cha icho ndipo ndiyenera kukhala ndi moyo.