Ngati mwakwatirana ndipo mwamuna wanu kale ali ndi ana akuluakulu kuchokera m'banja lanu loyamba, ndiye kuti zimadalira momwe amakukonderani. Inde, ndibwino kuti ana ake akuvomerezeni inu mwachikondi komanso moyenera komanso musayese kudzitayira mulimonse, kuthawa kunyumba kapena kukangana ndi bambo awo. Koma nthawi zina zimachitika kuti achikulire sangalekerere kuti abambo awo ali ndi mkazi watsopano. Kodi mungatani pa nkhaniyi ndi momwe mungakhalire ndi ana akuluakulu a mwamuna?
Choyamba muyenera kumvetsa zonse. Chowonadi ndi chakuti popeza ana ali kale achikulire, iwo amakhalanso ndi mfundo zawo, malingaliro, makhalidwe abwino ndi zina zotero. Ndipotu, iwo ali kale akulu omwewo monga inu ndi mwamuna wanu, komabe iwo ali, ngakhale ang'onoang'ono kwa zaka zambiri. Choncho, zingakhale zovuta kuvomereza zochitika zomwe abambo anabweretsa mkazi watsopano m'nyumba. Kawirikawiri ana ovuta kwambiri amakumana ndi mphindi iyi ngati imfa ya amayi awo. Ndicho chifukwa chake ntchito yanu yaikulu ndikumanga ubale ndi iwo, mwinamwake, ngati ana akutsutsana kwambiri ndi inu, banja lanu lingakhale loopsya, chifukwa tonse timadziwa momwe anthu ammudzi angakhudzire munthu aliyense. Ndipotu, pamkhalidwe umenewu, akhoza kuchita chirichonse kuti akulowetseni ndi mkwatibwi.
Mmene mungakhalire ndi ana a mwamuna: Malangizo othandiza
Khalani oleza mtima
Muyenera kuganizira kuti ana, mosiyana ndi atate awo, sanathe kukudziwani bwino. Iwo samadziwa bwino za makhalidwe onse abwino a khalidwe lanu, maluso anu, zomwe mumakonda. Tsopano inu ndinu mkazi wachilendo ndi wosadziwika kwa iwo, yemwe watumiza banja. Choncho, khalani oleza mtima ndipo mupatseni ana ake nthawi kuti akuzolowerereni ndikudziwani bwino.
Kuwonjezera apo, ana akuluakulu akhoza kukhala achisoni kwambiri ndi atate wa ine. Izi ndizofunikira kwambiri. Choncho, apatseni nthawi kuti azindikire kuti ndinu a m'banja lanu. Musathamangitse zinthu ndikukhala oleza mtima pang'ono.
Musaphwanya malire anu
Munthu aliyense amakhazikitsa chiyanjano ndi wina aliyense malire. Ndi munthu, tikhoza kulankhula kwa maola ambiri pa chirichonse ndikugawana zinsinsi zobisika, ndi wina yemwe timayankhula za nyengo. Dziwani kuti ana aamuna ali pafupi kwambiri kukulolani kupita. Ngati akukupatsani moni pamsonkhanowo kapena akhale chete kapena ayankhe mafunso anu ndi monosyllabic "ayi" kapena "inde", ndiye kuti simukuyenera kudzipangira okha.
Komanso, musayambe kukambirana momasuka ndi bambo anu ndikuyesera kuti musapemphe kanthu. Ngati ndi kotheka, kaya iwo, kapena mwamuna wanu nonse adzabalalika. Atangoyamba kukuzoloŵerani anawo ndipo asadzakhalenso osiyana kwambiri, monga poyamba, mukhoza kupita ku sitepe yotsatira-kuyankhulana kwambiri.
Yesetsani kulankhulana
Funsani mwamuna wanu zomwe ana ake amakondwera ndikuyesera kupeza chinthu chofanana nawo. Mwinamwake, mwana wake wamkazi amangomvera galu, ndipo mwanayo amadziŵa bwino makompyuta. Pezani chikhululukiro choyankhula. Funsani mwana wanu wamkazi kuti ndi galu wanji, ndi momwe akukula kapena pemphani mwana wake kuti akuthandizeni kusankha laputopu yatsopano. Pezani "malo okuthandizani" ndipo yesetsani kuyandikira kwa ana pang'ono. Yesetsani kuyankhula kawirikawiri kwa iwo kwa malangizo ena, ndipo apo, mukuona, kuyankhulana kudzasinthidwa ndi nkhani zomwe zimawonekera kuti ziwonekere.
Chimene sichingakhoze kuchitidwa mwanjira iliyonse
Kuti ayankhule momveka za amayi awo
Ili ndilo lamulo loyamba komanso lofunika kwambiri. Muyenera kuti musanyoze kapena kuwanyoza amayi awo, kunong'oneza za iye, kapena kuwonetsa zofooka zawo. Ndibwino kuti, musayambe kulankhula za amayi awo, kupatula ngati atachita izo poyamba. Pambuyo pake, amayi a munthu aliyense ndi munthu wofunika kwambiri m'moyo. Ziribe kanthu kaya amakhala ndi bambo awo angati, kaya ali m'banja lalamulo, kapena aliyense amene anali woyamba kusiya. Chinthu chofunika kwambiri ndi amayi awo ndipo iwo sangamusiye kuti apite. Choncho, musalole kulowerera ndale, ndipo ndibwino kuti musayambe nkhani zovuta.
Musamalankhulane ndi bambo awo
Lamuloli silili lovomerezeka pokhapokha ngati mwamuna wanu sakufuna kuyankhulana ndi ana ake omwe. Muzochitika zina zonse, musayesetse kuchepetsa kulankhulana konseko, mwinamwake pamakhala tsiku lina kumva kuti "ana ndi okwera mtengo kwambiri, ndipo wina akhoza kupezeka kwa mkazi wawo."
Werengani ana ake kuti azikhala ndi makhalidwe abwino
Kumbukirani kuti ana ali kale akuluakulu ndipo sangakonde kuti mukuwaphunzitsa. Chifukwa chake, akhoza "kuchitira nkhanza" malangizo anu, ngakhale mutakhala oyenera. Zonse zomwe mungachite ndi kupereka uphungu wopanda nzeru ndikuwapatsa ufulu wosankha zomwe akuganiza kuti n'zolondola. Musayese kukakamiza maganizo anu pa iwo ndi kuwaumiriza. Vseravno simungathe kukwanitsa zomwe iwo onse achita mogwirizana ndi malangizo anu, koma ubalewu ukhoza kukhala wopanda chiyembekezo.
Awa ndiwo malamulo oyambirira a khalidwe ndi ana okalamba a mwamuna. Pazinthu zina, muyenera kumvetsa ndi kuvomereza kuti ana ake ali anthu omwe ali ndi "mphukira" zawo pamitu yawo. Choncho avomereze momwe iwo alili ndikuyesera kuti mupeze anzanu.