Mwinamwake mukudziwa za ziwerengero zomvetsa chisoni, zomwe zinafotokozedwa mu nyimbo yotchuka: "... kwa atsikana khumi molingana ndi chiwerengero, anyamata asanu ndi anai ..." Nthawi zonse pamakhala oimira amuna ambiri m'dziko lathu kuposa oimira gawo labwino la umunthu. Ali mnyamata, ndi kosavuta kuti mkazi apeze bwenzi lomanga nalo banja, popeza chilengedwe m'nthaŵiyi ya moyo ndi zochuluka kwambiri, ndipo zofunikila kuti anthu omwe akufuna angathe kukhala otsika. Pakula msinkhu, pempho la amayi kuti akhale ndi bwenzi lomanga nalo banja likukula, ndipo mwayi wokwatirana waperewera.
Mkhalidwe kupyolera mu ndende.
Kawirikawiri amai amawoneka munthu amene amamukonda kupyolera mu magalasi obiriwira kwa zaka pafupifupi 25. Pa nthawiyi mayiyo ndi wamng'ono, wokongola, choncho ngati sangagwirizanitse moyo wake ndi wina, ayenera kuyang'ana vutoli mwa iyeyekha. Ngati mawu awa ali okhudza inu, mwinamwake ndinu wamanyazi. Kunyalanyaza kwakukulu kumawoneka pa zifukwa zosiyanasiyana. Nthawi zambiri izi zimachokera ku zovuta zomwe zimakula kuyambira ubwana. Katswiri wa zamaganizo yekha angathandize kuno. Muzochitika izi, muyenera kuyang'ana chifukwa, ndikudzipangira nokha, kukhala ndi chidaliro.
Kuponderezedwa.
Palinso chifukwa china chochitira manyazi ndi atsikana aang'ono. Kawirikawiri, asungwana aang'ono amadziona kuti ndi olemera, oipa, ndi zina zotero. Kawirikawiri izi zimati ziwoneka zawo sizingatheke. Ngati inu, kapena mwinamwake mwana wanu ali ndi vuto loterolo, ndiye kuti muyenera kuchita bwino. Ndikofunika kuthetseratu zovuta zoterezi. Zingakhale zopanda ntchito kugwiranso ntchito maonekedwe anu. Kupatulapo kumangokhala kokha ndi vuto la kubala kwa maonekedwe. Pankhaniyi, yekha opaleshoni ya pulasitiki angathandize.
Zomwe sizinapambane.
Zifukwa zomwe zili pamwambapa sizowopsa ngati zachitatu. Amayi ambiri muunyamata wawo kapena pambuyo pake amakumana ndi zovuta mu chikondi. Ndicho, mkaziyo akufika pakukayikira pa luso lake, kukhumudwa, mwinamwake, kukana ubale wam'tsogolo. Pankhaniyi, musataye chiyembekezo, kudzidalira. Muyenera kukhulupirira ndi mwayi wanu. Ndithudi inu simunakumanepo ndi munthu wanu. Koma tchuthilo lidzafika pamsewu wanu. Muyenera kukhala oleza mtima, nthawi idzadutsa, ndipo mudzapeza munthu wokwatirana naye.
Zofuna zambiri.
Amayi makumi atatu nthawi zambiri amapanga zofuna zapamwamba pa osankhidwa awo. Ambiri ndi amuna omwe amatsatira mapemphero oterowo. Pankhaniyi, amayi ambiri amagwera mwamphamvu kwambiri: ali okonzeka kukwatira wina aliyense, kungokhala ndi mwamuna m'nyumba. Pano iwe uyenera kuima, pumani ndikuganiza: ndipo kodi mungagwirizane ndi munthu uyu? Kodi zofooka zake sizikuthandizani kuti moyo wanu ukhale wosatheka? Kodi mwakonzeka kupirira zizoloŵezi zake zoipa ndi minuses? Ganizirani za izi bwino kwambiri. Phunzitsanso munthu yemwe simungathe kupambana, ndipo sikofunikira. Osati munthu aliyense adzalekerera, ngati ayesa kumusintha. Ndipo ngati akulolani kuti muchite izi, mwina ali wofewa komanso wofooka.
Kodi pali mwamuna wabwino?
Komabe, muyenera kukumbukira kuti chofunikira, kwenikweni, palibe. Amuna omwe alibe zizoloŵezi zoipa ndi zosakanizika (mpira, nsomba, makompyuta, ndi zina zotero) sapezeka mu chilengedwe. Choncho, muyenera kuchepetsa bar ya zopempha zanu, koma musaike pansi.
Kusungulumwa ngati kutuluka?
Amayi ambiri, osapeza amuna awo, kapena kukhumudwa ndi amuna, amasankha kukhala okha. Komabe, izi zili ndi zovuta zambiri: ngati mu moyo wanu wachisoni kapena chimwemwe, simungauze wina aliyense zakukumana ndi zomwe mumakumana nazo. Chabwino ndi zambiri zoperewera kwa banal moyo wodalirika - sipadzakhala wina wakukhazika mtima pansi; amuna onse akugwira ntchito panyumba inu mudzakakamizidwa kuti muzichita nokha, kapena kubwereka anthu pazinthu izi. Mwina, pambuyo pokukhumudwitsidwa, kutemberera kwa amuna onse, ngakhale moyo woterewu udzawoneka ngati nthano, koma zikhoza kukuthandizani mwamsanga. Chifukwa chake, muyenera kusonkhanitsa mphamvu, kuiwala ndikukhululukira zolakwa zonse zakale ndikukhulupirirani kuti mudzakumana ndi munthu woyenera. Zikuwoneka kuti ndi zabwino kwambiri, simudzazindikira zofooka zake, ndipo zolephera zing'onozing'ono zidzakhululukidwa.
Mabungwe a akatswiri a maganizo.
Komabe, kuti mupeze munthu, muyenera kuyesetsa. Pitani kumalo kumene mungakumane ndi munthu wanu. Ndipo ingoyima kuyang'ana mkati mwawekha, kuyang'ana pozungulira. Mwinamwake mwamuna wa maloto anu amagwira ntchito pafupi ndi inu. Kapena mwinamwake mudzakumana naye ku supermarket. Sungani mobwerezabwereza. Smile ndi chida chanu chabwino kwambiri. Onetsani chisangalalo chabwino osati kokha ndi anzanu, komanso pafupi ndi anthu. Kumbukirani kuti amuna ngati akazi okondwa kwambiri. Musamachite manyazi ndi amuna omwe akufuna kukumana nanu. Kuti mupeze mkazi ndi mwamuna, ndiye kuti mukhale wotanganidwa. Mwinamwake uwu ndi mwayi wanu wa chikondi chosangalatsa. Komabe, samalani, sikuti anthu onse ali ndi zolinga zabwino. Samalani maganizo anu. Mwinamwake, mwa inu, kunyada kochuluka kunalembedwa. Chotsani khalidwe ili lachikhalidwe choipa. Kumbukirani mafilimu a Hollywood omwe anthu amakhulupirira. Zimangokhala mafilimu komanso munthu ndi wokongola komanso wamphamvu. Kumbukirani mafilimu a zaka za m'ma 1960, omwe nthawi zambiri ankasonyeza zochitika pamene mkazi adadziumba yekha. Choncho, choyamba, muyenera kuleza mtima, nzeru, luntha ndi chisamaliro.
Musamadziyese nokha zofewa kapena, mosiyana, munthu wolimba kwambiri. Yoyamba ndi yovuta kugawana nanu mavuto a moyo ndipo idzalowetsanso mapewa anu ovuta; wachiwiri sangayembekezere kulemekeza malingaliro anu.
Ndipo kumvetsetsa: Sikuti mumangofuna kukhala ndi anzanu anzeru komanso ophunzira. Mwamunayo akufunanso kuti azikhala ndi nkhawa, amafuna kukhala ndi mkazi wotero pafupi naye, amene amamvetsetsa, kumvetsera, kupereka malangizo, ndi zomwe angalankhule nazo. Choncho, yesetsani nokha, phunzirani maphunziro, phunzirani zina. Izi sizidzangokufikitsani pafupi ndi msonkhano ndi mwamuna wa maloto anu, komanso kukulolani kuti mudzilekanitse nokha, muiwale za kufufuza kwa kanthawi kochepa.
Tikukhulupirira kuti malangizo a katswiri wa zamaganizo "Mmene mungapezere mwamuna wanu" ndikutsimikizirani kukuthandizani, ndipo mudzakumana ndi mnzanuyo.