Nanga zikumbukirozi zimachokera kuti ndipo zimayambira kuti? Ndipo chirichonse chimayamba ndi lingaliro limodzi lazing'ono, lopanda pang'onopang'ono, lomwe simumvetsera. Koma potsiriza iwe umamira mkati mwake mosagwirizana, ndipo umayamba kukula, monga snowball ndi kumizidwa mmenemo, kumakhala kochulukira, kukulitsa nkhawa, mantha ndi mantha. Koma kukumbukira maubwenzi apamtima ndi apadera, amamveka kwambiri kukumbukira, ndipo kuiwala nthawi zina kumakhala kovuta kwambiri. Makamaka pankhani yopezeka ndi wokondedwa. Koma nthawi iyi ndi mayeso ovuta kwambiri kwa munthu. Malinga ndi akatswiri ambiri aza maganizo, anthu safuna kugawana wina ndi mzake, ngakhale ali ndi ubale woipa kwambiri, chifukwa akuopa kubwerera kuunyamata. Zili ngati kuswa ndi makolo anu atsopano.
Zimakhalanso kuti kupatukana kumatha nthawi yaitali chifukwa cha chiyembekezo chopanda phindu komanso chopanda phindu, zomwe zimangowonjezera. Panthawiyi, kukhumudwa, kukhumudwa ndi zolakwika zina zimagwedezeka ndi mphamvu zawo zonse. Ndipo palibe mu moyo uno sichimasangalatsa, ndipo simukufuna kuchita chirichonse. Kawirikawiri pali milandu pamene nkhani zosathetseratu zimapangitsa kuti anthu azidziwa bwino ntchito. Pankhaniyi, mumangokhalira kukambirana ndi wokondedwa wanu (wokondeka) mwamtendere komanso nthawi zonse ndikukonzekera mfundo zonsezi pa ubale wanu.
Komabe mungathe kuchotsa malingaliro a maubwenzi akale? Kawirikawiri zovuta zobisika zimamveka mu ndende za malingaliro awo, kwa nthawi yaitali. Koma ngakhale mutaganizira kuti wolakwirayo (wakhululukidwa) wakhululukidwa (amakhululukidwa), mkwiyowo ukhoza kubwereranso masiku angapo kapena miyezi ingapo. Koma pamene mawuwo akupita, amachiza mabala onse, ndibwino kuyembekezera. Funso lokhalo ndilo: utali wotani? Ndipo yankho liri lakuti: aliyense ali ndi njira zosiyana. Winawake ali wokonzeka kuiwala chirichonse pambuyo pa sabata, ndipo wina adzafunikira zaka. Zomwe zimatsimikiziridwa pano ndi nthawi ya chiyanjano ndi khalidwe la munthuyo. NTHAWI ndi imodzi mwa njira zomwe mungaiwale za maubwenzi akale komanso kuchotsa zochitika pambuyomu.
Njira ina ndiyo kugwira ntchito yophiphiritsa yophiphiritsira. Mwachitsanzo: Tengani miyala yolemetsa ndi yolemetsa ndikuiponyera kutali, mukuganiza momwe zilili ndi zochitika zonse zakale. Kapena kuti muyatse kandulo ndikuyang'ana, ganizirani kuti, pamodzi ndi phula losungunuka, maganizo am'mbuyomu akubisika. Zotsatira zake ndi kuwonongeka kwa zithunzi zofala: kusiya, kuwotcha, kapena kungoponyera mu urn.
Pali mwayi wina woiwala maubwenzi akale. Tiyenera kuyesera kuti tipeze chilichonse chomwe chimakumbutsa munthu amene kale ankamukonda. Choyamba, chotsani zinthu zake, maulendo ake onse pafoni ndi pa kompyuta, zithunzi, mphatso. Yesetsani kupeŵa malo a nthawi yapadera. Ndipo, potsirizira pake, kuchepetsa kukhudzana ndi chinthu cholekanitsa. Ndipo ndi bwino kutenga nthawi kuti mupange chinachake choti muchite. Zingakhale bwino kuchita masewera ena, monga machitidwe olimbitsa thupi amathandizira kumasula ubongo wodzazidwa kale ndi kusintha maganizo. Komanso, zatsopano ndi anthu omwe mumadziwana nawo zimatsimikizika kuti zisokoneze zomwe mukukumbukira.
Pakati pa akatswiri a zamaganizo pali mfundo yokondweretsa kwambiri: kuchokera ku chizolowezi chilichonse choipa kapena kudalira komwe mungathe kuchotsa masiku 21! Nthawi yambiri yomwe amawatsimikizira, ubongo umayenera kumangidwanso kuti agwire ntchito yatsopano. Mungathe kumuthandiza pa izi, kupeŵa malingaliro oipa monga: "Sindikusowa aliyense (ine ndikusowa)," "palibe amene adzandikonda." M'malo mwake, nkofunikira kuganiza moyenera momwe zingathere, ziribe kanthu momwe zikuwonekera. Ndipo taganizirani monga izi: "Posachedwa ndikumana ndi wokondedwa wanga!". Pambuyo pake, monga mukudziwira, malingaliro amatha kukhala, ndipo mwinamwake, tsiku lotsatira, chimwemwe chimabwera kwa inu. Muyenera kukhala omasuka ndipo musaphonye mwayi uliwonse.
Mu chiyanjano chatsopano, yesetsani kuti musapereke chilichonse, ndikudzipatulira nokha, mwinamwake izi zingathe kuopseza wosankhidwa wanu (osankhika) ndikusiya makhalidwe abwino omwe iye anakopeka nawo. Koma, monga lamulo, izi zikugwiritsidwa ntchito kwa amayi, chifukwa cha chikhalidwe chawo. Ndipo chofunika kwambiri: Musadandaule ndi zomwe zapitazo, musataye mtima podziwa kuti uyu ndi munthu yemwe ndimamufuna kukhala moyo wanga wonse. Ndipo ndikudzikonzekeretsa ku lingaliro lakuti chirichonse chiri pafupibe.
Munthu aliyense amasankha momwe angachotsere zomwe akumbukira maubwenzi akale. Pakhoza kukhala chikhumbo, koma yankho lidzapezeka nthawizonse. Ndipo ziribe kanthu komwe angasankhe, chinthu chachikulu ndi chakuti iye anathandiza. Ndipo kumbukirani chinthu chimodzi: Zakale ziri pa izo ndi zakale, kusiya izo kumbuyo, ngakhale ziri zabwino, ndipo ngati ziri zoipa, mochuluka kwambiri, zimakhala moyo panopa ndikukhulupirira mtsogolo mwabwino!