"Kodi pali chikondi?" Kodi zizindikiro zake ndi ziti? Sindimakhulupirira ... "- Funsoli linafunsidwa ndi mtsikana wazaka khumi ndi zisanu. Ndinaganiza ... Ndipotu zokambirana za mutuwo - kaya pali chikondi nthawi zambiri zimayamba kutikhudza ife paunyamata. Zidali zaka izi zomwe timakumana koyambirira ndi chikondi, zokhumudwitsa ndi zodandaula. Kodi nchiyani chomwe chikuchitikadi kwa ife: kumanganso mahomoni a chamoyo kapena choyamba chodziwa ndi sukulu ya moyo?
Kwa zaka zambiri, kukhala ndi chidziwitso mu ubale ndi amuna kapena akazi, timawoneka mosiyana ndi chikondi, komanso zotsatira zake zonse. Chinthu chachikulu ndichokuti zokhumudwitsa zoyambirira zaunyamata sizikhala ndi zotsatira zolakwika pa psyche ya msungwanayo ndi maganizo ake pa moyo ndi amuna makamaka. Zingakhale zabwino kukhala ndi walangizi anzeru pafupi ndi iye, bwino, ndithudi, mayi kapena munthu wina wodalirika.
Chifukwa cha zovuta za moyo wachinyamata komanso osakonzekereka a psyche achinyamata kuti adziŵe zokhumudwitsa za moyo mokwanira, ndikofunika ndipo zingakhale bwino kuti musachedwe ndi abambo oyambirira. Msungwana ayenera kukhala, poyamba, wokonzeka kuti chikondi chikhoza kukhala osati moyo, kuti sichikondedwa. Mgonero woyamba sungakhale "malipiro" chifukwa cha chikondi kapena chifukwa cha wina. Kugonana kungakhale kokha pamene kumakondweretsa mkaziyo, popanda kufunsa chilichonse.
Nanga chikondi n'chiyani? Nthawi zambiri timawakonda, timafuna kuti tibwerere. Chidziwitso chodzikonda chimagwira ntchito: "Inu kwa ine - ine kwa inu" ... Chikondi choyera, chosadzikonda sichitanthauza chilichonse, koma chikondi choterocho sichipezeka ndipo sichimasangalatsa munthu wachikondi. Kawirikawiri chikondi chimagwirizana ndi chikondi chenicheni. Kutengeka mtima ndikumverera msanga, mwinamwake kutengera kwa mahomoni omwewo: tikuyaka, kuyaka, kutaya mutu wathu, ndipo patapita kanthawi sitingamvetse zomwe tapeza pa nkhani ya kupembedza kwathu.
Mukamakonda, mumapirira, dikirani mwakachetechete, popanda kukayikira komanso muli ndi chimwemwe chamkati. Monga kamtsikana kamodzi kanati: "Chikondi ndi pamene amayi akuwona momwe abambo akukhala pa chimbudzi, ndipo sakuziganizira." Zomwe tatchulazi zitsimikiziranso kuti chikondi chiri ndi zambiri, pali zisonyezo zambiri za chikondi, ndipo munthu aliyense akhoza kufotokoza kulongosola kwake kwakumverera uku.
Monga palibe anthu awiri ofanana, kotero palibe ziwonetsero ziwiri zofanana za chikondi. Munthu aliyense amakonda m'njira zosiyanasiyana, monga momwe amaperekera. Chifukwa chake, chikondi cha mkazi yemweyo ndi amuna osiyana chidzakhala chosiyana: ndi wokonda, wosadzikonda komanso wosasangalala nthawi yomweyo, ndi wina-wodekha, wodekha ndi wodalirika. Koma izi sizikunena kuti woyamba kapena wachiwiri anamukonda iye mocheperapo, kapena anachita ...
Ndili ndi zaka zomwe timaphunzira kukonda. Ndipo ngati tili ndi zaka khumi ndi zisanu ndi ziwiri tinagwedeza miyendo yathu ndikulira mtolo kuchokera ku mtundu wina wa chikondi cholephera, ndiye pa zaka makumi awiri ndi zisanu, osati amayi onse omwe angadandaule motere. Wopangidwa ngati munthu, kudziwa kuti ndi wofunika, mkazi amadziwa kuti ndi "nyama" yolondera amuna. Ngati izo zitachitika mwinamwake, ndipo muthamanga pa kuyitana koyamba kwa mwamuna, ndiye, mwinamwake, iye adzataya mwamsanga chidwi chanu.
Inde, pali chikondi poyang'ana poyamba, ndikukhulupiliranso, koma sikuti aliyense ali ndi mwayi wopezera chikondi choterocho. Nthawi zambiri kumverera sikubadwa kuchokera maminiti oyambirira a msonkhano, koma patapita nthawi, nthawi zina ngakhale patapita chaka. Choncho, wina ayenera kutha kapena kuphunzira momwe angakhalire ubale wotere womwe umakhala wolimba ndi tsiku lirilonse. Mwachibadwa, kuti mukhale ndi maganizo oterowo muyenera kukhala ndi zochitika zina kapena talente yakubadwa.
Ndipo tsopano ganizirani zochitika zapadera za lingaliro la "chikondi". Zimadziwika kuti chikondi ndi chosiyana, pamaziko a izi, kusiyanitsa mitundu yambiri ya chikondi.
Mitundu ya chikondi
- Eros - chilakolako cha chikondi, chinachititsa, koposa zonse, ndi kukopa kwa chiwerewere. Ndi chilakolako, chakuthupi komanso chauzimu, zambiri kwa inu nokha, chikondi chomwecho ndi chowala komanso chokhutira. Chikondi cha mtundu umenewu sichisangalala nthawi zonse, chifukwa mofulumira, okondedwa amakonda kutaya mitu yawo, ndipo pakubwera nthawi "yodandaula".
- Filia - ubwenzi wapamtima, chikondi-chokhumba chosankha choganizira, choganizira. Uku ndiko kumverera kokondweretsa. Kumbali ina, mu chikondi ichi, mutha kupereka ngakhale kuwerengera, monga munthu akuganizira ndi kusanthula ubale wake. Muziphunzitso za Plato, mtundu uwu wa chikondi umakwera kwambiri.
- Agape ndi chikondi chauzimu, chopanda chifundo. Ndi chikondi cha nsembe, chikondi chifukwa cha wina, monga nsembe kwa iwekha. Zipembedzo za padziko lonse zimaona kuti chikondi chimenechi ndi chimene chimakhudza anthu padziko lapansi. Osati munthu aliyense akhoza kukonda ndi chikondi choterocho, chikondi popanda kufunsa chilichonse pobwezera. Ndipotu ichi ndi chikondi chenicheni. Ndizomvetsa chisoni kuti nthawi zambiri chikondi chotere sichigwirizana.
- Storge - chikondi cha banja, chikondi-chidwi, chikondi chachikondi. Chikondi choterocho chiyenera kupezeka m'banja loyenera, kumene kumvetsetsa, kulemekezana wina ndi mnzake kumalamulira. Kawirikawiri chikondi choterechi chinachokera pamwambapa.
- Mania ndi chikondi-obsession, kutentha thupi, kusokonezeka ndi kupweteka mu moyo, kusowa tulo ndi njala. Zikumveka ngati zoopsa kwambiri, ngakhale atsikana ambiri atsikana "akuvutika" ndi chikondi choterechi.
Chowonadi ndi chakuti: chikondi chimadziwonetsera mwa mitundu yosiyanasiyana ndi mitundu. Ndipo ziribe kanthu momwe chikondi chinkawonekera, icho chinali nthawizonse, chiri ndipo chidzakhala. Ndipo zomwe mumakonda ndi mawonetseredwe ake - eros, ogwirizana, agape, storge kapena mania, kusankha ndi kumverera nokha. Kodi munayamba mwayesa kukambirana ngati pali chikondi ndi mnzanu kapena wokondedwa ndi wokondedwa wanu? Zingakhale zosangalatsa kudziwa maganizo ake. Ngakhale, choonadi chikunenedwa, sikuti aliyense adzakuwuzani choonadi cha moyo wawo ...