Bwato lokonda limasweka osati moyo. Ndipotu, m'banja lililonse pali nkhani zingapo zomwe zimayambitsa kukondana wina ndi mzake. Ayenera kukambilana palimodzi, kukambilana momasuka ndipo osati "kukanikiza" wina ndi mnzake. Mwachitsanzo, apa pali mafunso amodzi okha: Kodi banja lofala limagonana kangati pa sabata?
Kukondweretsa kugonana ndi kukhutira kumadalira khalidwe, osati kuchuluka. Izi, zikuwoneka, zimamveka ngakhale kwa aang'ono kwambiri. Pambuyo pa chisangalalo, chilakolako cha kugonana chimatha kukhala chithunzithunzi.
Zikuwoneka bwino kuti onse okwatirana akhoza kukhala okhutira nthawi zambiri, ndipo ngati banja limakhala mosiyana ndi makolo awo, limakhalanso nthawi iliyonse. Koma sizongopanda kanthu zomwe Baibulo limachenjeza pa mayesero. Ndipo mayesero oterewa mu banja la mononuclear (mwamuna, mkazi, ndi ana omwe sali okalamba pansi pa denga limodzi) akhoza kugonana.
M'malo mosangalala pang'onopang'ono ndi chuma cha maganizo omwe amaperekedwa mwachibadwa, okwatirana (komanso nthawi zambiri mwamuna kapena mkazi) amayamba kudzifunsa kuti: Kodi banja lachiwerewere limagonana kangati pa sabata? Ndipo kodi banja lathu ndilochibadwa kuyambira pano?
Kuchokera pano kuti "mavuto osiyana" amayamba. Kuchokera ku zovuta mpaka kukhwima, ndiyeno - kukangana pa mutu wosiyana, wowoneka ngati wosagwirizana ndi moyo wapamtima wa banja. Koma, makamaka mu ubalewu ndi chifukwa cha chimwemwe chimene mwamuna ndi mkazi amapereka ndi kulandira. Kugonana kungagwirizanitse banja, ndipo mwinamwake kuswa.
Ndipo komabe, kuchuluka kotani?
Ngati tipitiliza kuwona kuti timayesa khalidwe la kugonana m'banja lokhazikika ndi kuchuluka, ndiye timapeza zotsatirazi. Akatswiri amanena kuti mpaka zaka 40 (zowonjezera kapena zaka zisanu), nthawi zambiri anthu awiriwa amakhala pabedi 2-3 pa sabata.
Ukalamba, ndalamazo zikhoza kuchepa katatu patsiku, ndipo pang'ono (mpaka zaka 25), abambo amatha kuchita 2-4 pa usiku. Mwachidziwikire, amuna odziwa bwino sangathe kupirira nawo. Koma, mwinamwake, iwo akhoza kulipira "kusowa" kwa khalidwe, ndipo ndi bwino kulingalira momwe mungachitire izo ...
Komabe, ngakhale mafilimu akuluakulu ogonana, ogonana ndi amuna ogonana omwe amalankhula nthawi zonse za ubwino wake, amatikumbutsa za kusiyana kwa chikhalidwe.
- Pali anthu omwe ali okwiya, otentha - komanso alibe chidwi chogonana.
Zosangalatsa zosangalatsa zapadera zimakhala zosangalatsa, koma alibe "zikhumbo" zogonana nthawi zambiri. Ndipo pali anthu omwe ali ndi kutentha pang'ono. Ndipo si zoona kuti ziwerengero zambiri zokhudzana ndi kugonana m'banja "zachibadwa" zimapangidwa ndi iwo - zimachitika kuti "kugonana" chifukwa cha chiwerewere ndi chifukwa chachikulu chogonana.
Nchiyani chimayambitsa zovuta?
Ziribe kanthu kangati pa sabata pali kugonana m'banja lomwe limatchedwa "mwachibadwa", sikoyenera kulingalira. Pambuyo pake, kuwerengera kumapha chikondi chonse, umoyo wauzimu, kumatembenuza ntchito yowonongeka, kulowetsa ntchito kukhala chizoloŵezi. Nkhani ina ya pakhomo ndi kukwaniritsa mwamuna (kapena mkazi wokwiya) - izi sizili zofanana ndi kusangalala ndi zikhumbo za wina ndi mnzake. Kumene kuli ntchito - palibe chilengedwe, chimwemwe chenicheni ndi zachilendo. Ndiyeno mwamuna (kapena mkazi) akudandaula kuti mkazi kapena mkaziyo amakhala osasamala kwambiri pamtima kapena amakonda malo enaake.
Malangizo kwa omwe akufuna "kuyeza" chiwerengero cha
Malangizo abwino kwambiri kwa omwe adzawerengera kangati banja lachiwerewere likugonana kwa mlungu umodzi kapena mwezi lidzakhala lokhumba kuwerengera kangati pamwezi kulibe borsch, kapena kangati anadya chokoleti.
Ndipo zokhazo zomwe siziri "kudyedwa", komabe zimakhala zochitika zogwirizana, kugwiritsiridwa ntchito kwa mphamvu zamaganizo-ndi zosangalatsa komanso zogwirizana.
Nthawi zina, ngati mukufunadi kuwerengera - taganizirani za yemwe mukuchitira izi. Ngati kwa mnzako - monga momwe amadziwika bwino ndi bambo wachikulire komanso anzake omwe amamugonana, dokotalayo adalangiza molondola. "Ndipo inunso muwauze." Ndipo musayese kupanga chipinda cha banja pabwalo la masewera a Olimpiki.
Ndipotu, okwatirana ndi achikulire, ndipo amadziwa kuti chilengedwe ndi zosiyana ndizosiyana ndi mawu akuti "mofulumira, apamwamba, amphamvu."