Awiri amakumana, amasangalalira wina ndi mzake, koma pambuyo poti chikwati chikhoza kubwera, kukhumudwa ndipo, chifukwa chake, kupuma. Nchifukwa chiyani izi zikuchitika?
Kwa anthu ambiri, lingaliro la banja loyenera limachokera pa malingaliro oipa ndi olakwika, ndipo chotero, kuyembekezera kuchokera ku ukwati wamuyaya, amalandira kugwa kokha!
Ambiri, pamene alowa muukwati, samvetsa kuti maubwenzi a banja ndi tsiku lopweteka kwambiri tsiku ndi tsiku ndipo chikondi chimodzi sichitha kutali. Musanayambe kukwatirana, sikungakhale zopanda nzeru kuganizira zomwe zimagwirizanitsa inu kupatula chikondi, ngati muli ndi zofuna zambiri ndi malingaliro pa moyo. Mfundo yakuti otsutsa amakopeka ndi malingaliro olakwika, chifukwa izi zonse zimagwirira ntchito pa gawo loyambirira la chiyanjano, bola ngati mutaphunzira wina ndi mzake ndi kusawona kwanu kumayambitsa zachilendo mu ubale wanu. Pakapita nthawi, izi zidzangododometsa, chifukwa zidzakhala zovuta kuti mupeze zovuta zowonjezera. Musadalire kuti munthu wina pafupi ndi inu adzasintha zofuna zake kapena moyo wake - ndizosatheka kubweza aliyense. Ziri zovuta kuganiza kuti mkazi wamkazi amapita kumabwalo usiku chifukwa mwamuna wake amagwiritsidwa ntchito kukhala ndi moyo wofanana (kapena mosiyana). Mwinamwake, ukwati woterowo udzasokonezeka pakapita kanthawi.
Ndipo pano ngakhale kugonana sikupulumutsa! Ukwati sukhazikitsidwa osati pa zamoyo zokha, komanso pa ubale wa miyoyo, choncho kugonana koyenera sikumangokhalira kugonana m'banja, koma kungowonjezera kokondweretsa komanso kofunikira.
Musaiwale za nkhani zakuthupi. Chikondi ndi chikondi, koma moyo umakhala wosagwirizanitsa ndipo chilichonse chimene anganene, mavuto a zachuma m'banja sikofunikira kwambiri.
Choncho, zikutanthauza kuti chikondi chenicheni musanayambe kukwatirana, ndipo muukwati mukugwira ntchito, phunzirani kuti mupange mgwirizano. Ndipo ngati tikulankhula za chikondi chenicheni pambuyo paukwati, ndiye chinthu chofunikira ndikusunga maubwenzi abwino: kukonda momwe mudakhalirana, komabe musunge zinthu zabwino zomwe munapeza muukwati. Zochitika zamtengo wapatali zomwe simungapeze paliponse, choncho muyamikire izi pa theka lanu lakale!
Musayang'ane chikondi chenicheni mutatha kukwatirana ndi munthu wina yemwe mwamuphwanya, yesetsani kusunga ubwenzi ndi kukhulupirirana. Amene amadziwa, mwinamwake, mwa munthu yemwe kale anali naye, mumapeza mnzanu wodalirika! Gwiritsani ntchito chochitikacho, kenako musagonjetsenso zokhazokha, komanso mupatsidwe mpata wopita patsogolo, kuti mukhale osangalala. Ndipo ndi zolemetsa zambiri zomwe zingakhale zovuta kwambiri.
Ndipo kumbukirani kuti chinthu chachikulu sichoncho ngati ichi ndi chikondi chenicheni kapena ayi, musanafike kapena pambuyo pa ukwati wanu - chinthu chachikulu ndi chakuti pafupi ndi inu munali munthu wapafupi amene mukufuna (kapena akufuna) kukhala moyo wanu wonse! Yamikirani zomwe muli nazo, kumanga maubwenzi anu, ndipo musadalire zomwe zidzachitike ndipo mutsimikizire ngati pali chikondi chenicheni chisanachitike ndi pambuyo pa chikwati chovomerezeka ndi momwe mungasungire chokwaticho chikhale chidziwitso kwa inu! Pambuyo pa zonse, ziribe kanthu mafunso omwe mumapempha, yankho lidzakhala limodzi - chikondi ndi kukondedwa! Ngati mumakonda wosankhidwa wanu, simungathe kumupweteketsa mtima kotero kuti yesetsani kumanga ubale wanu, kumvetsera maganizo a mnzanuyo, ndipo izi ndi zofunika kwambiri m'banja. Kuyesera kuti mumvetsetse wina ndi mzake mungathe kugwirizana.
Chikondi chili ndi malamulo ake ndi malamulo ake! Ndipo amawalanga mwankhanza aulesi, kotero musaiwale kuti moyo sizoloŵezi umene umasokoneza malingaliro, koma njira yokhayo yodziwirana ndi kumiza mu dziko la wokondedwa, mutasungunuka mkati mwake ndi kukhala gawo la izo !!!