Phunziroli linakhazikitsa bwino chiyanjano pakati pa chiwerengero cha ana ndi kutalika kwa moyo wa amayi. Choncho, anapeza kuti chiopsezo chochepa cha imfa yoyambirira mu kugonana kwabwinoko kunabereka ana amodzi kapena atatu okha, omwe amafa kwambiri chifukwa cha kuwonongeka kwa amayi omwe ali ndi ana oposa asanu. Chifukwa chomwe thupi lachikazi panthawi ya mimba ndi kubala kumanyamula katundu, nthawi zambiri kufunika kwa magazi, kutaya thupi, kufooketsa chitetezo cha m'mimba, matenda a hormonal. Mulimonsemo, kubwezeretsa ndi kubwezeretsa kubereka ndi kofunika, zomwe zimatenga nthawi, koma m'banja lalikulu sizingatheke. Ndiyeno, kuphatikiza banja, kunyumba ndi ntchito si zophweka kuchita. Ngati tilingalira zomwe zikuchitika mdzikoli pokhudzana ndi umoyo wa amai, chilengedwe ndi miyezo ya moyo m'mayiko ambiri, tingathe kunena molimba mtima kuti kubadwa sikupita popanda zotsatira, ndipo zonse zimadalira payekha pa thupi la mkazi. Nanga nchiyani chomwe chimapangitsa amayi kubala kamodzi kokha, kapena kupitanso izi mobwerezabwereza? Tiyeni tiwone izo.
Muli ndi zochuluka bwanji?
Momwemo, zimaonedwa kuti dziko lathu siliyamba kuyenda pang'onopang'ono komanso molimba mtima, mkazi ayenera kukhala ndi ana atatu. Koma ichi ndi chiphunzitso ndi ziwerengero chabe, koma bwanji ndiye kuti zonse zidzakhala.
Zavomerezedwa kuti ana atatu ali ambiri. Ngakhale mu moyo wamba chiwerengero cha "atatu" sichimayambitsa mgwirizano wotero. Choncho, makolo amtsogolo ayamba kale kukhazikitsa kuti "ambiri" ana omwe sawafuna. Ndipotu, banja lalikulu kwambiri, tikhoza kulingalira za banja, lomwe limabweretsa osachepera asanu. Koma tsopano ndi zosiyana kwambiri ndi lamulo.
Kawirikawiri zovuta kubadwa koyamba ndi zochitika zaumoyo zimayimitsa mkazi yemwe anali wachangu kuti akhale ndi banja lalikulu, nthawizina zimapangitsa mavuto a zachuma, kapena mwamuna ndi mkazi asankha.
Izi zimachitika kuti mabanja oterewa adakali ndi chisankho chachiwiri. Koma izi zisanachitike, amalingalira kwa nthawi yaitali, ayang'aninso mwayi wawo wothetsera mavuto, kuthetsa mavuto ndi vuto la nyumba ndi kusintha makhalidwe. Maganizo a mwana wachitatu, ngati atero, satenga nthawi yaitali. Ndizosatheka kutchula anthu onse olemekezeka, omwe amachititsanso mphamvu zawo. Ndipo kawirikawiri makolo omwe akufuna kukhala ndi ana atatu kapena kuposa omwe amapezeka nthawi zambiri samakhala okwanira. Pambuyo pa zonse, si aliyense amene angadzitamande chifukwa cha zabwino zachuma, ndipo alibe mavuto apadera akukula, kukweza ndi kuphunzira ana onse. Chotsatira ndi chimodzi - chiwerengero cha mabanja akuluakulu oterewa amachepa.
Mukufuna zochuluka bwanji?
Asayansi afotokoza mfundo ina yosangalatsa kwambiri. Chofunika kwambiri ndi chakuti mkazi mmodzi yekha amangofunidwa ndi mkazi yemwe amakhala wonyada. Ndipo zanenedwa, khalidwe lachikhalidweli limapitilira ngati silololedwa, ndiye kuti ndi makolo ophunzitsidwa bwino. Ndikupemphani kuti mwamsanga muzindikire kuti ili ndi banja limene adaganiza mwadala kuti adzipereke kwa mwana mmodzi, ndipo sanatero chifukwa cha umoyo wawo ndi zina zofunika. Kodi izi zilidi choncho? Apa pali chitsimikizo chowonekera.
Choncho, chinthu choyamba chimene timamva kuchokera kwa makolo omwe ali ndi mwana mmodzi: "Tikhoza kupereka mwana mmodzi yekha. Eya, zikuwoneka kuti palibe chodandaula. Aliyense akuwerengera mwayi wawo. Koma monga momwe chiwonetsero chimasonyezera, pamodzi ndi ndalama za njira zawo zonse, mphamvu, ndi misempha kuchokera kwa mwanayo ayamba kufunafuna kubwerera kotsiriza. Makolo akufuna mmodzi, wochenjera kwambiri, wokongola, wamphamvu, wopambana, ndi zina zotero. ndi m. mwana. Panthaŵi imodzimodziyo, nthaŵi zambiri samvetsera mwachidwi maluso ndi zofuna za mwanayo mwiniyo. Inde, ndipo mwanayo alibe chosowa chotere, chinachake choyenera kusankha ndi kuchifunira, chifukwa aliyense ali wokonzeka kuchita izo. Makolo amayesera kuzindikira chilichonse kudzera mwa mwana omwe sankatha kuchita pawokha.
Simunazindikire, nthawi zambiri mzimayi akakula, kudziwa momwe angagwiritsire ntchito mwamuna wina bwino, kapena kugwiritsira ntchito chinthu kapena chida, osadzimva osadziwika ndi chisoni m'mawu ake akuyankha kuti: "Ndinangofuna mnyamata, ndipo ine ndinabadwa" . Pano pali chitsanzo chowonekera cha zofuna zomwe makolo adakondwera nazo. Pankhaniyi, makolo nthawi zambiri amatsutsa zolephera za mwanayo, ndipo sangathe kuvomereza kuti mwana wawo si mwana kapena mpikisano wa Olimpiki, koma mwana wamba.
Chiwerengero.
Pamene "kuwerengera" chiwerengero chofunikira cha ana chimene mkazi ayenera kukhala nacho kuwonjezera pa zifukwa zonse tazitchula pamwambapa, ziyeneranso kuganiziridwa ngati akufuna kudzipereka yekha kapena ayi. Ngati ndi choncho, ndiye kuti ayenera kukhala ndi ana awiri. Pambuyo pake, mwanayo amafunikira kulankhulana nthawi zonse, komanso kusamala. Pamene ali yekha - chinthu chomwe adzafuna kuti akwaniritse zosowa zake zonse, padzakhala makolo. Ngati anawo ali awiri, nthawi zambiri amatha kusewera pamodzi, kukulolani, mutenge mphindi zingapo kuti muchite zomwe mukufuna kapena zosowa. Zidzakhala zofanana ngati pali ana atatu kapena anai m'banja. Kawirikawiri, pakuwonekera kwachisanu, zinthu sizikusintha kwambiri, monga yoyamba ikukula kufikira nthawi ino, ndipo idzakuthandizani. Tiyeneranso kutchulidwa kuti ana ochokera m'mabanja akulu ndi otanganidwa kwambiri, omwe ali ndi udindo komanso mtsogolo samantha mavuto a moyo.
Ndipo ngati simukuyesa zopitirira muyeso, ndiye kuti, zilibe kanthu kuti ana angakhale ndi ana angati, chinthu chachikulu ndi chakuti onse ayenera kukhumba ndi kukondedwa. Mavuto ambiri akhalapo, vutoli lidzathetsedwa kwa zaka zambiri, koma chimwemwe chimene ana amapereka poyerekezera ndi mavuto chimatenga nthawi yochepa. Gwiritsani ntchito nthawiyi, ndipo musachite mantha kukulitsa. Ndipo musaiwale kuti ana ndiwo tsogolo lanu, kotero muli ndi mwayi wodzipangira nokha.