M'maganizo mwa ambiri a ife, timaganizo timayesedwa, malinga ndi zomwe mkazi aliyense yemwe wafika pokhala wamkulu akuganiza kuti akhale mkazi wokwatiwa, koma amuna, mosiyana, yesetsani kupewa mgwirizano waukwati ndi mphamvu zawo zonse. Ndipotu, zinthu sizing'onozing'ono komanso monga zisonyezero, pali atsikana ambiri omwe ali pabanja kapena osakhala ndi mwamuna. Pa mndandanda wa zochitika zoyenerera, akazi oterewa alibe ukwati wokhala ndi diresi yoyera, losiyasi yakuda, ofesi yolembera ndi mphete pa chala chosatchulidwe. Inde, inde, ngakhalenso mpata wokhala wofunikila ambiri sitampu mu pasipoti sichikondweretsa iwo.
Nchifukwa chiyani atsikana amapanga malingaliro ofanana pa ukwati ndi banja ndi zonse zomwe zikutsatira? Tiyeni tiyesetse kumvetsa chifukwa chake atsikana ena safuna kukwatira.
Zifukwa zomwe atsikana amakhala "osangalala" ndi zosangalatsa
Zikuoneka kuti zifukwa zomwe atsikana ena sazengereza kudzimanga okha ndizochepa.
1. Kutalikirana ndi zolakwika
Izi zimachitika kuti amayi ena samangokwatirana chifukwa safuna kuwona wokondedwa wawo pafupi ndi iwo - sagwirizana kuyesa mitundu yonse ya zochitika zogwirizana ndi ukwati wa chikhalidwe. Ndizovala zoyera zoyera, alendo ambiri, nyumba ya phwando ndi kusunga miyambo yakale , monga, kutsuka miyendo ya apongozi awo, kapena kuyika mbale pamutu wa mkwatibwi, yemwe tsopano wakhala mkazi.
Otsutsa ukwati woteroyo amakondwera kunena "inde" awo mu chikhalidwe cha chikondi, ndipo samasamala kaya abwera kwa wolemba milandu mu jeans, kapena adzakonza phwando laukwati kunja kwa mzinda pamphepete mwawo. Chinthu chachikulu ndi chakuti kuti akondwerere anali anthu apafupi kwambiri, omwe, mwa tanthawuzo, sangathe kukhala ochuluka.
2. Kusakayikira za kulondola kwa chisankho chawo
Palinso atsikana omwe sali otsimikiza za anzawo. Amatha kukomana nawo kwa zaka zingapo, amakhala muukwati, koma kukhazikitsidwa kwa chiyanjano sikusinthidwa.
Ngati achibale, achibale ndi achibale omwe amawakonda kwambiri amawafunsa mafunso, amayi omwe amadzitengera okhawo nthawi zambiri amaseka zomwe akunena sizoipa komanso chifukwa chake ayenera kusokoneza pasipoti yoyera ndi chidindo china.
Monga momwe chiwonetsero chimasonyezera, awiri awiriwa pambuyo pa nthawi inayake akupitirirabe. Ndipo sitinganene kuti panali chikondi pakati pa abwenzi: kumverera kulipo, koma kuti mkazi asankhe kudzidalira yekha ndi ana ake amtsogolo kwa munthu uyu, tsoka, chikondi chimodzi sichikwanira.
3. Zovuta zokhuza makolo
Makolo anasudzulana pamene mwana wawo wamkazi ali ndi zaka ziwiri, abambo sagwirizana ndi mwana yemwe wayamba kale kukhala wamkulu. Bamboyo amamwa mowa kwambiri, ndipo nthawi ndi nthawi amapereka dzanja kwa amayi ake. Chotsatira chake, mayi wochokera msinkhu amaphunzitsa mwana wake kuti azitha kufanana ndi ma marimariants, kapena mawu ena opanduka. Mwachidziwikire, mphamvu ya banja pa mwanayo ndi yaikulu, ndipo ngati sakuona chitsanzo chabwino cha kuyankhulana pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi, lingaliro lakuti ukwati si chinthu china chokha kusiyana ndi mgwirizano wa anthu awiri omwe amazunzana komanso nthawi yomweyo ana amakhala mosadziŵa.
Njira ina yomwe ingapangitse mutu wa msungwana kuganiza za ukwati ndi banja la kholo, limene aliyense amakhala ndi moyo wake, amayi ndi abambo sachita manyazi, koma samalankhulana wina ndi mzake, samalowa muzochitika za theka lawo lachiwiri. Ndipo zotsatira zake: mwanayo samvetsa ngati pali chikondi, kapena chikondi pakati pa makolo.
Mwachibadwa, msungwanayo, powona pamaso pa chiyanjano choterocho, akuwopa kubwereza zomwe zidzachitikire amayi ake ndipo sadzafulumira kukwatira.
4. Ndipo popanda mwamuna ndi zabwino
Pali wothandizana naye pa chiwerewere, ndikukhulupirira kuti ntchito ya mwamunayo ndiyokhalitsabe banja, ndipo mkaziyo sali woyendetsa cholowa chokhoza kulandira wolowa nyumba.
Amayi awa amatha kukhala odziimira paokha, amayesetsa kumanga ntchito pawokha, kukhala ndi mbali zonse, kupeza amuna osachepera. Komanso, akunena momveka bwino kuti kugwirizana ndi ukwati ndi okonda kugonana, ndi okonzeka kubala ndi kulera mwana payekha, popanda kudalira wina aliyense.
5. Ziphuphu m'magazi
Mwinamwake, mtsikana aliyense yemwe sanakwatire asanakwanitse zaka 20 mpaka 22 amamenyedwa nthawi zonse ndi achibale ake akulu. Komanso, mafupipafupi amakula ndi zaka za akazi osakwatiwa. Chofunika kwambiri cha zigawenga ndi izi: Aliyense akufuna kudziwa nthawi yomwe adzaitanidwe ku ukwatiwo, makolo mwachidwi amalota kulandira zidzukulu zawo, ndipo amayi awo akugwira ntchito ndi mphamvu zawo zonse amayesa kuwachepetsa kwa ana awo omwe akuyembekezera.
Azimayi amachitira zoterezi m'njira zosiyanasiyana: wina amaseka, ena amayamba kugwa, ena amayankha mosapita m'mbali kuti adzakwatirana pokhapokha ngati akufuna. Omwe akusiyana nawo kugonana kwabwino amakhala okonzeka kuphulika ndi kugona, akumva mafunso ngati amenewa ku adiresi yawo. Amachokera ku zovuta, iwo ali okonzeka kukhala osayera "okonda kwambiri", koma monga opitirira, amawaphwanya iwo, "mumakutu anu" kuvomereza kuti iwo alibe maganizo.
6. Banja ndizoloŵera ndipo palibe chodabwitsa
Amayi omwe sali mofulumira kukwatira amakhala otsimikiza kuti moyo wawo waukwati udzawachotsa kwa amayi okongola omwe ali ndi nthawi yochuluka yochita bizinesi yawo, omwe amakhala otopa nyumba nthawi zonse, omwe maiko adatseka pa ziwiya zophika, makina osamba ndi zina "zokoma" moyo.
Pofuna kumvetsetsa kuti miyendo ya chiwonetserochi ikukula, musapite kutali: yang'anani amayi anu ndi agogo aakazi, omwe nthawi zambiri samayiwala za chidwi chawo chazimayi, atembenuka kukhala "woyang'anira nyumba", omwe amawasamalira pakhomo pawo. Kutembenukira kwa mkazi woterewa, asungwana aang'ono amadziwa kuti sakanafuna kukhala mu nsapato zawo, ndipo mphamvu zonse zikuyesera kukankhira mmbuyo nthawi ya ukwati.
7. Sindidzadzipereka ndekha pa chilichonse.
Cholinga ichi chosafuna kupita kwa wolemba milandu chimatchulidwa ndi amayi omwe akuyesera kufika ku mapiri ena a ntchito. Amakhulupirira kuti woyang'anira ndi banja sagwirizana ndi zinthu, choncho munthu ayenera kusiya chinachake.
Mwinanso m'mabanja ena izi ndi zomwe zikuchitika, koma makamaka ntchito iliyonse iyenera kukhala yokonzekera kuti idzinenera ufulu wawo.
8. Kusagwirizana kopambana kumbuyo kwanu
Kawirikawiri, ngakhale kukwatirana ndi mantha a atsikana amene akhala akugonana, zomwe zimawabweretsera ululu komanso kupweteka. Inde, amayi oterewa, alephera, amakumana ndi amuna ndipo amavomereza kuti ukwati wawo ukhale wovomerezeka, koma sitampu yawo imakhala yoopsa. Komanso, ngakhale kukambirana zaukwati kungawachititse kuti asamvetse bwino.
Ziri bwino chifukwa chake izi zimachitika: atsikana sakufuna kulowa mumtsinje womwewo kawiri, kukhulupirira kuti munthu watsopano sangakhale wabwino kuposa mwamuna woyamba.
Ngati simukufulumira kukwatirana, yesani kudzifufuza nokha, ndipo mwina, mfundo zina zingaphatikizidwe ku nkhaniyi.