Pafunso la chifukwa chake mwamuna amafunika kudziwa za chibwenzi chake, ndithudi, simungayankhe mwamsanga. Malinga ndi maganizo a mutu uno, n'zotheka kusiyanitsa magulu angapo a anyamata.
- Anthu omwe alibe chidwi kapena chosakhala ndi chidwi ndi zomwe munachita kale. Izi si zoipa, koma nkofunika kumvetsera zambiri. Ngati kusowa chidwi kotereku pambali ya munthu kumabwera chifukwa cha kulemekeza ufulu wanu, chifukwa cha moyo wanu wakale, mwina ndiko njira yabwino kwambiri. Munthu woteroyo amamvetsa kuti kale ali ndi ma attachments ndi maubwenzi, ndi theka lake lachiwiri. Mwamuna samakhumudwitsa izi ndipo amakhulupirira kuti zomwe zinalipo, zadutsa, ndipo palibe chimene chingamulimbikitse.
Komabe, samalani ngati muzindikira kuti chibwenzi chanu sichikondwera ndi zomwe munachita kale, osati chifukwa chakuti amakulemekezani, koma chifukwa safunikira. Mwina iye ndi wanu weniweni sadzakhala ndi chidwi kwenikweni! Ndipo ziri choncho, zikhoza kukhala choncho ngati munthu akuganiza kuti: timakumana naye, ndipo zomwe zimachitika kunja kwa misonkhanoyi, sizinandichitire ine chidwi kapena ayi. Kotero mungathe kubweretsa vutoli, pamene mukukumana nanu, akhoza kukhala ndi zowopsya imodzi kapena zingapo kumbali. Pankhaniyi, iye adzakulolani chimodzimodzi. Koma ndi ubale wanji! Kupusa uku kufalikira kwa malingaliro kwa wina aliyense yemwe sanabweretse chimwemwe, musanyengedwe! Kotero khalani maso ndipo yesetsani kumvetsa chomwe chiri kumbuyo kwa udindo wa mnyamata wanu.
- Njira ina - mnyamata akukhudzidwa ndi zochitika zanu zakale, akufunsanso zambiri za ubale wanu wakale, ndi zina zotero. Mwina pali zifukwa zomvera! Ndipotu, kulingalira koteroko pa chikhumbo chodziŵa zonse za m'mbuyomo kungathe kufotokozedwa mwachidule - nsanje! Ndipo ngati zili choncho, m'tsogolomu zochitika zoterezi zidzabwerezabwereza. Sikovuta kukhala ndi munthu wansanje. Pamafunika kuleza mtima kwambiri kufotokozera nthawi zonse muzithunzi zomwe ziribe chifukwa chokayikira, kuti akukongoletsa chirichonse, ndi zina zotero. Ganizirani, kodi mwakonzeka kukhala moyo wotero?
- Chinthu chachitatu. Mnyamatayo amamvetsera mwachidwi chidwi chanu chokha, chomwe mumadziuza nokha. Mwamuna amadziŵa zinthu zonse mwakachetechete, ngakhale kuseketsa ndipo sachita zowawa nthawi zina. Izi ndizonso zabwino. Koma musapitirize ndi nkhani! Pambuyo pake, ngati munthu samasamala zomwe mudachita pamaso pao pabedi ndi wina, ngati akumvetsera zonse mwakachetechete, ndiye kuti muli ndi chiopsezo chodzidzimutsa ndipo chigamba chokonzekera kukukhululukirani nonse (mukufunikira izi?) Kapena ndizosafunikira kwambiri Ndiwe munthu. Izi ndi inu nokha zikhoza kukulolani kuti muzitsutsa, ndipo kuchokera kwa inu mudzayembekezera kusayanjana komweko. Ndipo izi zili kutali kwambiri ndi ubale wabwinobwino, komanso kuchokera ku zabwino ndi zina zotero! Ndipo ife tonse tikufuna kukhala pafupi naye!
- Njira ina - munthu - miseche. Inde - inde, palipo! Ngati mukukumana ndi izi, sindingakulimbikitseni kukhala naye pachibwenzi cholimba. N'zotheka kuti kuseri kwanu amauza anzanu mwatsatanetsatane za ubale wanu wamakono ndi moyo wanu wakale. Mitundu yambiri ya amuna nthawi zambiri imapezeka pakati pa okondedwa achikazi. Yang'anani mwatcheru wokondedwa wanu. Kodi sakonda kunena za inu ndi ena (palibe choipa kuposa mkazi!) Kodi abwenzi ake akunena chiyani za iye?
Ngati mumakhulupirira kuti chibwenzi chanu ndi miseche, khalani kutali naye, musayambe ubwenzi wapamtima! Eya, ngati muli owona, ngati ichi ndi chikondi chenicheni, ndipo musanakwatirane ndi moyo wanu mutakhala kutali, samalani. Mwinamwake misecheyo inali fad wake wachifundo wosakondera. Tsopano iye wakhala pansi ndipo alibe kanthu za chibwenzi chake (mwina, za iye!) Osayankhula. Chabwino, ndiye muli ndi chimwemwe!
Ndiye n'chifukwa chiyani mwamuna ayenera kudziwa zomwe zagwiritsidwa ndi mtsikana wake? Munthu wachibadwa adzasunga muyeso mu chirichonse. Adzamvetsera mwachidwi nkhani yanu, koma amakana kudziwa zambiri. Iye sadzakwera mumtima mwanu ndi kuchitira nsanje ndi kunja. Koma muyeneranso kuvomereza kuti sangakhale ndi chidwi pomvera zakupambana kwanu kale payekha. Munthu wamba ayenera kukhumudwa ndi lingaliro lomwe chibwenzi chake chikhoza kukhala ndi wina. Ndicho chifukwa chake samvera zonse. Iye amangonyalanyaza zomwe munachita kale. Kawirikawiri mwamuna ayenera kudziwa kuti tsopano chibwenzi chake chimamukonda, kuti iye yekha ndi iye. Munthu wabwino (ndipo onsewo ndi osaka mwachibadwa!) Musakonde kugawana nawo nyama yomwe amayembekezera kwa nthawi yayitali (ndiko kuti, mtsikana wawo wokondedwa). Tenga nthawi ino.
Pali zifukwa zingapo zabwino zomwe nthawi zina munthu wabwino angakondwerere ndi chibwenzi chake. Mu ufulu wathu wokwanira pazinthu zamakhalidwe, amuna ena amawopa pang'ono atsikana omwe analibe chibwenzi pamaso pawo. Kawirikawiri, mwamuna amangofunika kutsimikizira kuti sanalakwitse mwa chisankho chomwe wosankhidwa wake ali nacho chidwi kwa amuna ena (kuphatikizapo chidwi). Pachifukwachi, zakale (koma osati zokhutira kwambiri!) Moyo wa msungwana wamwamuna umakhala ngati chitsimikiziro cha kuwerengera kwake kwa abambo a amuna, kukongola kwake, kukongola kwake ndi chithumwa.
Komabe, ngakhale lerolino, sikuti anthu onse ali ofanana. Ambiri a iwo, m'malo mwake, samasankha kukhala ochezeka kwambiri, koma ochepetsedwa, omwe amaoneka ngati osasintha. Pa nthawi yomweyi, mnyamatayu, akuwonetsa za mawonekedwe a wosankhidwa wake, ndi chifaniziro chake, ndi kukhala naye paubwenzi.
Ngati mutayang'anitsitsa chibwenzi chanu, mosakayikira, zofooka pakati pa inu zidzachepa, ndipo chiyanjano chanu chidzakhala cholimba ndi chifupi.