Komabe, tiyesera kufufuza nthawi zina pankhaniyi.
Kodi chiyanjano chimayamba kuti?
Iwo amanena kuti moyo ndi wolemera kuposa fano. Ndipotu, pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi, chibwenzi chimapezeka nthawi zambiri kumalo osungirako anthu ambiri: kuntchito, kusukulu, pafupi ndi nyumba (kumadera ena). Pang'ono pa tchuti, usiku ndi ma intaneti, koma makamaka timapeza chikondi mu bwalo la abwenzi apamtima, anzako kapena abwenzi.
Chiyanjano chiyamba
Palibe njira zambiri. Ena amapeza chikondi poyang'ana, ena amadziwika bwino kuti chibwenzi chiyambe kwa zaka zambiri. Koma pali nthawi yoyenera pamaso paukwati, pambuyo pake mabanja amphamvu adalengedwa - ndi miyezi 3-6. Nthawi imeneyi ndi yovuta kwambiri kudziwa ngati munthuyo ali pafupi ndi inu. Kachiwiri pa kukhulupilika kwaukwati pakati pa anthu omwe amadziwika kuyambira miyezi isanu ndi umodzi kufika pa chaka, lachitatu - kuyambira miyezi itatu mpaka itatu. Ngati anthu adadziwana kwa nthawi yaitali: zaka ziwiri, zitatu kapena zisanu, koma sanayambe mgwirizano wa chikondi, monga lamulo, amapanga mabanja ovuta komanso osakhazikika. Kuti chiyanjano pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi chikhale champhamvu komanso chosatha, zosankha zofunika kwambiri ziyenera kutengedwa pa nthawi imene amadziwika kuyambira miyezi itatu mpaka isanu ndi umodzi. Izi zikutanthauza kuti kudziwa momwe ubale pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi ukhoza kuyamba, ndi zomwe iwo angatsogolere, ndikofunikira kwambiri kuti timvetse momwe chikondi chimaonekera poyang'ana poyamba. Chifukwa maanja omwe adalengedwa kuchokera kwa okalamba, ndi lamulo, okwatirana akufunafuna anthu awiri osauka komanso osungulumwa .
Chikondi chimayambira poyang'ana koyamba
Zosamveka bwino, asayansi akhala atapeza kale njira yabwino ya chikondi poyang'ana poyamba. Mwachidule, ndi motere: Mwachidziwitso tiri ndi mndandanda wa zifukwa za gawo lachiwiri lomwe linayambira ali mwana. Zingasagwirizane ndi zomwe timaganiza tokha, ndi zomwe timayankhula ndi ena. Tikangomana ndi munthu yemwe akugwirizana ndi mndandanda wazinthu zambiri, pali "fupi "- chikondi poyang'ana poyamba. Chidziwitso chathu kapena chidziwitso chimatiuza mwadzidzidzi kuti ndi amene akusowa.
Ngati mndandanda wa makhalidwe a mwamuna ndi mkazi umagwirizana, ubale umayamba mofulumira, ndipo umayamba kukhala m'banja losangalala komanso lamphamvu. Ngati mndandandawo umagwirizana ndi umodzi wokha, pali chikondi chosakondweretsedwa, chomwe ambiri amawona kuti ndizovuta kwambiri.
Asayansi ndiyeno podsuetilis: amati chikondi poyamba pakuwona kangapo kamodzi kokha m'moyo wanu, ndipo nthawi zambiri mndandandawo umagwirizana, kusiyana ndi kusagwirizana. Choyamba, pa mndandanda uliwonse wa makhalidwe omwewo umakhala ndi mtundu wina wa umunthu, ndipo anthu okhala ndi mtundu woterewu padziko lapansi ali ndi amodzi. Chachiwiri, mfundo yothandizana nawo nthawi zambiri imagwira ntchito, mwachitsanzo, amayi osasamala ngati amuna osapota, ndi amuna otsika - akazi omwe ali ndi khalidwe. Izi ndizo, chifukwa cha mtundu uliwonse wa umunthu wa munthu ndizoyeneranso kukwaniritsa khalidwe la mnzanuyo.
Zonsezi ndi zabwino pamfundo, koma izi zingagwiritsidwe ntchito bwanji, mumapempha? Pali zovuta kulangiza apa. Pali khalidwe lotere monga "msinkhu wa reflexivity". Ndikochepa kwambiri, ndipo n'zosadabwitsa kuti ndipamwamba kwambiri pamaganizo mwa anthu otsekedwa komanso osagwirizana. Anthu ambiri alibe mphamvu yokwanira kuganizira, ndiko kuti, kudzidziwa bwino. Ndipo amafunikira kuyang'ana kuchokera kunja. Sizinali zopanda phindu kuti kwa zaka mazana ambiri pakhazikitsidwa dongosolo laukwati, lomaliza mothandizidwa ndi ochita masewera, kapena okonzekera ndi makolo. Sizinthu zokhazokha zokhudzana ndi chikhalidwe komanso chikhalidwe cha anthu zomwe zinali pamtima pa izi, komanso malingaliro awo kuchokera kunja.
Ngati mukufuna kupeza moyo wanu wokondedwa, mukhoza kuthandizana ndi abwenzi, ndi abwenzi, ndi alangizi othandizira maganizo, omwe angakupatseni mwayi wozindikira chomwe mukufuna. Ndipo mutatha kupeza, muyenera kuphunzira kukhala omasuka. Khalidwe la khalidweli ndi lovuta kwambiri moti ndi loyenera kuchita masewera apadera. Chifukwa cha kuphunzitsa mwatsatanetsatane, simungamve ululu wamwamuna poona munthu woyenera, kuyankhulana naye mofatsa komanso mopanda chibwibwi kapena kupweteka, zomwe zimakhala zochitika pa nthawi yomwe timakhala ndi maganizo. Kuwonjezera pamenepo, khalidweli lidzakulolani kuti musamenyane ndi munthu woteroyo chifukwa cha njala ya ubale weniweni. Mwachidule, mudzatha kupeza bwino pakati pa chilakolako chodziwika ndi chosadziwika, pakati pa zofunikira ndi zoyenera kwa wokondedwa wanu wam'tsogolo. Kenako chidzakupatsani mwayi wosankha misonkhano yomwe mwakhala mukuyembekezera kwa nthawi yayitali. Pambuyo pake, zimachitika kuti munthu woyenera - ali kwinakwake kwambiri, pafupi kwambiri!