Banja laling'ono nthawizonse ndilo gawo lalikulu, ndiko kuyambira kwa chochitika chatsopano, chokongola, kusintha kwakukulu pamoyo wa onse awiri. Koma m'banja lirilonse pali mavuto ndi mikangano, chifukwa kuyanjana kwa anthu kumakhala kolimba kwambiri, ndipo mgwirizano womwewo nthawi zina umakhala ndi khalidwe la detente, limene timapatsidwa kwa banja. Mutu: "Zomwe zimayambitsa kusamvana m'banja" zimakuuzani zokhudzana ndi maubwenzi omwe ali pachilumba chatsopano kumene cholinga chawo chinali kupeŵa iwo mtsogolomu.
Mwachikhalidwe chawo, mikangano ikhoza kutseguka (mau, kulira, kutsutsana), komanso kutsekedwa (kunyalanyaza, kukwiyira, chete). Cholinga cha mikangano nthawi zambiri chikhumbo chofuna kukwaniritsa zofuna zawo, kudziyesa okha, kukhutiritsa zilakolako zawo zamaganizo, ndi zina zotero. Mikangano ya mikangano nthawi zambiri ndi mikangano, mikangano, zifukwa ... Maonekedwe, mawonetseredwe ndi zifukwa za wina aliyense zimakhala zosiyana. M'nkhani ino, zifukwa zazikulu zomwe zimayambitsa mikangano m'banja lachinyamata zidzatchulidwa.
Kawirikawiri, n'zotheka kuyang'ana mizu yawo pamodzi ndi zosowa zaumunthu zomwe zimachokera nthawi zambiri. Izi zikuphatikizapo: kugonana, chakudya, kuyankhulana ... Mikangano idzachitika pamene pali mantha oti osakhutira ndi mmodzi wa iwo.
Kuchokera pamapeto awa: mikangano ingabwere pamene mavuto ayamba kapena pali vuto lokusakhutira ndi zilakolako ndi ziyembekezo zathu. M'banja muli nthawi zambiri "zovuta," pamene chiyanjano chimawonjezeka, ndipo chiopsezo cha mikangano chimawonjezeka.
Yoyamba mwa izi idzakhala gawo loyambirira la chiyanjano, pamene malingaliro akuti "I" amatha, ndipo "ife" timabwera mu malingaliro a banja. Iyi ndi nthawi yokhazikika, banjali limaphunzira kukhala limodzi, chikondi ndi chikondi zimatha, ndipo mmalo mwawo zimabwera moyo wa tsiku ndi tsiku, moyo wosiyana, aliyense amadziwonetsera yekha kuchokera kumbali inayo, amasonyeza kuti ndi weniweni. Nthawi yoyamba ya maubwenzi apabanja ndi oopsa, chiopsezo cha kusudzulana ndipamwamba kwambiri.
Nthawi yachiwiri ikukhudzana ndi kubadwa kwa mwana. Pali mavuto okhudzana ndi kufooka kwa makhalidwe ndi thupi, pomwe mphindi zosiyana ndi maonekedwe a moyo angakumanepo.
Nthawi yachitatu ndi "pakati" m'zaka za m'banja. Anzawo amaganiziranso miyoyo yawo, pozindikira momwemo moyo wa tsiku ndi tsiku, chizoloŵezi ndi kuunika, pali "overasat" ya wina ndi mzake.
Zomwe zimayambitsa kusamvana pazigawo zosiyana zingakhale zosagwirizana ndi kugonana kwa anthu omwe ali ndi zibwenzi, kusakhoza kufotokozera malingaliro awo ndikupereka chidziwitso chokhudza zosowa zawo zamaganizo kwa wokondedwa wawo.
Zomwe zimayambitsa mikangano zingakhale zosakhutira pa kulankhulana, kukhumudwitsa, kuthandizira, kuthandizira, kulemekeza kumverera kwa wina wa zibwenzi, kupondereza "I" wake.
Mwachitsanzo: Chimodzi mwa zifukwa zomwe zimayambitsa mikangano m'banja lachichepere zimakhala mowa mwauchidakwa. Pankhani iyi, mnzanu amene amamwa mowa mwauchidakwa, amaphwanya zikhalidwe za anthu, amangosiya thanzi lake, komanso amalekanitsa ndi dziko lonse, kuphatikizapo kuchokera ku banja. Nkhondoyo imabwera chifukwa chakuti mmodzi mwa okwatirana amalephera kukwaniritsa zofuna zawo zokha, kuwonetsa kusamvetsetsa kwathunthu kwachiwiri ndikunyalanyaza maganizo ake ndi zosowa zake.
Mikangano ingabwere chifukwa cha zifukwa zosagwirizanirana ndi miyambo ndi miyambo ya mwamuna ndi mkazi wake, kusowa kwa bajeti, komanso, chifukwa chosiyana maganizo pa zosangalatsa.
Kudziwa zomwe zimayambitsa mikangano, tikhoza kupeza njira zochepetsera chiopsezo chawo, kuwateteza ndi kuchepetsa. Pofuna kukhazikitsa mikangano yochepa m'banja, munthu ayenera kuphunzira kuyankhula, chifukwa kukhala wokondedwa wabwino ndi luso lapamwamba: muyenera kugwira ntchito payekha, kuthana ndi zofuna zanu, kuganizira zofuna za wina. Ndipotu, ukwati ndi mgwirizano wa anthu awiri omwe tsopano ali onse, omwe ndi oyenera kuiwala momwe angadzifunire nokha ndi zolakalaka zanu. Kumbukirani kuti mnzanuyo akufunikira iwe, mchirikizo chako, chidwi ndi chikondi.
Kukhulupiliranso wina ndi mzake pazinthu zonse, ndikofunika kuchepetsa nsanje. Musaiwale kuti ngati mwamuna adakusankhani - zikutanthauza kuti ndiwe wokondedwa ndi wokondedwa wake, kuti ndiwe, osati ena, amene adakondana naye, ndikwati - ichi ndi chitsimikiziro. Musakayike nokha ndi kukongola kwanu, chifukwa kudzidalira kapena kudzikuza ndikumayambitsa mikangano, onse pamodzi ndi mnzanuyo.
Dzilemekezeni nokha ndi mnzanuyo, mumusangalatse iye ndi zosangalatsa zake, mumusangalatse zomwe wapindula, mumutamande ndikumuuza zakuya kwake. Pangani zodabwitsa, mutengere nthawi yambiri pamodzi - moyo wa banja ukhoza kukutsegulira zokondweretsa zambiri ndi zodabwitsa, musati muzitenga imvi ndi zokhumudwitsa. Nthawi zonse pali njira zambiri zosiyanitsira ndi kulimbitsa ubale wanu.
Onetsetsani nokha ndi chitukuko chanu, musadzithamange nokha, khalani maso pa mawonekedwe anu. Khalani osamala ndikudandaula za mwamuna wake, koma ingosonyeza kuti mukumufuna, chifukwa ndizo zabwino kwa inu.
Koma ngati mikangano yonseyi ikuchitika, muyenera kuwathetsa. Pano chinthu chachikulu sichikopa alendo, kukhala omasuka ndi oona mtima, kunena zokhazo zomwe mumaganiza ndikumverera. Musati mubise zambiri, muwope kunena chinthu chachikulu, chitani zimene ena adalangizitsa, chifukwa ndizofunika kuti musankhe zochita pazochitika zanu.
Kusamvana kuli bwino kwambiri pa zokambirana zomwe aliyense wa iwo amayesera kumvetsetsana wina ndi mzake, kuthandizana wina ndi mnzake ndikupeza kusamvana. Osangoganizira za maganizo anu. Ngati muli otsimikiza kuti malo anu okha ndiwo angayambitse vutoli, moyenera komanso makamaka, fotokozani momveka bwino chifukwa chake mukuganiza choncho, ndipo chifukwa chake aliyense wa inu akufuna zosankhazi, m'malo mofuula ndi kulimbikira maganizo anu , chifukwa, chifukwa "Ndikufuna."
Pomaliza, ndi bwino kukumbukira kuti mikangano yonse yothetsedwa, ndipo maonekedwe awo sayenera kuchita mantha. Sizimasonyeza kuti mgwirizano wanu ukugwa, kapena kuti simukugwirizana. Komabe, gulu lirilonse liyenera kudziwa zomwe zimayambitsa mikangano m'banja. Mikangano mwa nambala yawo mochepera nambala yawo ndi khalidwe kwa mabanja onse, chinthu chachikulu, phunzirani kupirira nawo. Kumbukirani kuti ubwino wa banja lanu umadalira pa inu nokha.