Liwu lakuti "mbuye" mwa amuna ambiri limagwirizanitsidwa ndi chinsinsi ndi kugonana kwa mayi amene mwamuna wake anakwatirana naye mwachinsinsi kwa mkazi wake. Nthawi zambiri, chiyanjano cha maubwenzi otero chimachokera pa chikondi ndi kugonana. Ndilo tanthawuzo la chinthu ngati "mbuye" zomwe ziri zabwino kwa mkazi yemwe amakumana ndi mwamuna wokwatira. Mu chiyanjano ndi ambuye, mwamuna amakhala ndi kukhudzidwa kwakukulu, kugonana, kuletsedwa ndipo kudandaula koteroko kumayitana foni ndi kukhoza kuchita chinachake choletsedwa, chomwe chimagwira ntchito bwino. Koma kodi ndi ntchito yochuluka yotani yomwe kutalika kwa ubale wa mwamuna ndi mbuye wake, ndipo aliyense wa anthu atatuwa (mkazi, mwamuna, mbuye) ali ndi udindo wotani, womwe umakhala wovuta kutero?
Mwamuna, mkazi ndi mbuye.
Mbuye wina yemwe angakhale wokondwa kale, amakhala ndi chidwi chake, kudzera mwa munthu amene amakhala ndi "moyo wapawiri". Pa gawo loyamba la ubale wotere, ndi mbuye yemwe ali ndi mphamvu zonse. Ndipotu, adali ndi chidwi ndipo amatha kupeza mwamuna yemwe wakhala ndi mkazi kwa zaka zingapo m'banja lalamulo. Koma, ngakhale izi, chidwi chake ndi nthawi yomwe mwamuna amapereka kwa mkazi watsopano m'moyo wake, osati kwa mkazi wake. Ndipo ngakhale atakhala nthawi ndi mkazi wake - amatha kumuganizira. Mwamuna amapereka chisankho kwa mbuye wake osati malingaliro ake, koma komanso muzochita zake. Amamupatsa mphatso ndipo akufuna kuti awone wokondwa ndi wokondwa. Apa tikuyenera kuzindikira kuti, ngati sizinali bwino kwa mbuye, kwa mkaziyo khalidwe ili la mwamuna kapena mkazi ndi losasangalatsa ndipo limabweretsa ululu waukulu. Choncho ndizosalungama ngati bukuli pambaliyi liri ndi nthawi yaitali. Koma posapita nthawi mfundo zonse zowonjezera "I" ziyenera kukonzekera ndipo ngati palibe aliyense mu "katatu" wachikondi, amachita moyo.
Kodi kumatanthauza kukhala "mu nsapato" za ambuye ?
Maziko a maubwenzi oterewa, monga lamulo, ndi mabodza ndi chinyengo, koma, komabe, mbuyeyo nthawi zonse samayang'anitsitsa zonsezi. Ngakhale popanda ngakhale kulingalira za kuti munthu wotereyo sanganyengere mkazi wake yekha, koma yekha. Mkazi uyu amangowona weniweni, kumunyoza iye weniweni. Koma ngati mukuweruza momveka bwino, mkaziyu nayenso amavutika ndi zochitikazo. Ndipo mwamuna pano akuchita ntchito yeniyeni yeniyeni. Mwa njira, nthawi yokhala ndi maubwenzi oterewa nthawi zambiri amakonzedweratu. Izi zimatsimikiziridwa ndi chakuti peresenti ya amuna ambiri amachoka pa banja chifukwa cha ambuye. Chifukwa chake, maubwenzi oterewa sangathe motalika kwambiri, chifukwa sikuti mkazi aliyense adzakhutira ndi kukhala "malo osungira" komanso "kuyembekezera nyengo kuti apite m'nyanja" ndikuyembekeza kuti mwamuna wake adzasiya mkazi wake chifukwa cha iye. Kudikira kosatha - ichi ndichopambana chomwe chimakhala pa maziko a maubwenzi ndi mbuye wake ...
Tsogolo la maphwando onse atatu.
Zoonadi, m'moyo muli anthu onse ndi ochepa omwe amasiya akazi awo chifukwa chakuti akusowa. Koma, chifukwa cha mwayi kapena chisoni, izi zimachitika kawirikawiri. Ndipo kufotokozera kwakukulu kwa izi ndikuti ndi mkazi watsopano, polenga banja, mwamuna akuyembekeza kusatsimikizika kwathunthu, zomwe sizingathe kunenedwa za vuto la malungo, koma chithunzi chodziwika bwino cha moyo wake pamodzi ndi mkazi wake wamakono. Kuonjezera apo, chikondi ndi mbuyeyo chimapatsa mkazi wolakwika mpata woti amve chithumwa chonse cha "chiletso choletsedwa", ndipo apa akuti "chifukwa chiyani kulipira zambiri." Inde, ndikumusiya mkazi wake, mwamuna amatha pafupi ndi mkazi watsopano kuti ataya ufulu wake wonse, womwe wakhala akufuna kwa nthawi yoposa chaka chimodzi. Kuwonjezera pamenepo, maubwenzi omangidwa pa chinyengo sangathe konse kutha. Posakhalitsa, kupewera kwa mwamuna nthawi zonse kudzamulepheretsa chikondi cha mbuye wake, ndipo iye adzabwerera ku banja.
Chabwino, ngati munthu adakalibebe pazofunika kwambiri mu moyo wake ndikupita kwa mbuye wake, nthawi ya ubale pakati pawo idzafika kumapeto. Pambuyo pake, onsewa, kwa kanthawi, akhala akuzunguliridwa ndi chinyengo chonse, zomwe zikutanthauza kuti izi zidzawatsimikizira, zomwe zidzati zakhala ndi moyo wa banja.
Kodi mwamuna adzakhala ndi mbuye wake kapena mkazi wake?
Ubale kumbaliyi sizimafika pa ukwatiwo. Ndipo izi ziyenera kukumbukiridwa nthawi zonse. Komanso kubisala, ndi misonkhano yamseri, yomwe ikuyembekezeretsanso kugwa. Zoonadi, kunena kuti munthu penapake amadziwa za tsogolo lake pafupi ndi mkazi uyu, koma kukhulupirika kwake kwa mkazi wake ndi banja lake kumakhala kosalekeza, ndithudi sikunatchulidwe.
Ndiyeneranso kutchula pano kuti osowa nthawi zambiri amabwera ndi amuna omwe amamva kuti alibe kanthu kapena amakhala otopa kwambiri ndikufuna kuyesa chinthu chatsopano. Ndikumayenda kumbali ndi kudzaza chosowa ndi "kugwirizana koopsa" kotere, mwamuna, ngati kuti palibe kubwerera ku banja mwanjira yapadera ndipo, chofunika kwambiri, kuyesa kubwezeretsa ubale wake wakale ndi mkazi wake. M'mawu ena, mbuye wa mkhalidwe uno ndi njira yabwino kwambiri yothetsera ndi kutuluka nthawi, koma, monga mukudziwa, ubwenzi wautali sudzatha. Pambuyo pake, chomwe chimatchedwa "chikondi adventures" munthu akupitiriza kukhala moyo wake wamtendere ndi woyerekeza, ngakhale osakumbukira zochitika zake kumanzere.
Chabwino, ngati "osakhulupilira" sakanatanthawuza kuyenda ndi kuponya ambuye, amamukankhira. Ndipo chifukwa chachikulu apa ndikumenyedwa kuchokera kumbali yake pa mwamuna, kotero kuti asinthe chinachake ndikupanga kusankha kwake kotsiriza. Ndipo amuna, monga mukudziwira, sakonda pamene akakamizidwa, kapena fulumira ndi chisankho. Ndicho chifukwa chake, njira yabwino kwambiri yothetsera iye "kuthawa ku sitima yowonongeka" ndi kutuluka mwamsanga kupita kumalo otetezeka kumene akhala akudziŵa kuti ndi ndani, kumbuyo kwa mkazi wake. Mkazi yekha ndi amene amatha kumumvetsa ndi kumukhululukira, ziribe kanthu kuti zimamuvuta bwanji. Monga akunena, simungathe kuchita izi chifukwa cha moyo wanu wa banja.
Ndicho chithunzi cha ubale pakati pa mkazi ndi mwamuna chimawoneka ngati mbuye, pomwe gawo lachitatu, kapena lachitatu, nthawizonse limakhala lopanda pake, ndipo nthawiyi nthawi zambiri amadziwika.