Ndipotu, pa nkhani ya: Ndimakonda onse amene ndiwasankhe, sindikudziwa, simungathe kusintha chirichonse pazochitika zonse. Pa chilichonse "ndimakonda" palinso zinthu zina zomwe zimayenera kuganiziridwa kuti zithetse vutoli. Choncho, tifunika kuyerekezera momwe "chikondi" awiriwa chinayambira, ndikuchitapo kanthu.
Kotero, bwanji ine sindingakhoze kusankha? Tiyerekeze kuti mtsikana akuti "Sindikudziwa", chifukwa izi zikuchitika. Wachimwene wathu wamphamvu ndi mtsikana wamng'ono. Si funso la kusankha munthu yemwe adzakwatirane naye posachedwa. Ali ndi mnyamata. Uwu ndiye chikondi chake choyamba, chachikulire chenicheni, chomwe adalota komanso chofunafuna. Kwa iwo, poyamba pakuwona, zonse ndi zabwino. Koma, ndithudi, pali ambiri "sindikudziwa" ndipo "sindikumvetsa." Mkaziyo amawona zofufuzira zake mwa iye, amakwiya ndi kukwiyitsidwa, komabe akupitirizabe kukhulupirira maganizo ake ndi tsogolo lawo losangalatsa.
Ndiyeno mnyamata wina amawonekera. Makhalidwe akunja ndi amtundu, amasiyana kwambiri ndi chibwenzi chake. Ndipo, chofunika kwambiri, poyamba samangodziyesa kutenga malo ake. Iye ndi bwenzi labwino, mwinamwake m'bale, yemwe iye amakhala wodekha mwauzimu ndi mwamaganizo. Komabe, nthawi ikadutsa, zimakhala zomveka kuti kumverera kwake sikunthandizenso abale. Amamuwona mnyamatayu mwamuna ndipo amamvetsetsa kuti samusamala. Ndipo, chochititsa chidwi kwambiri, m'maso mwake kwa iye akuwerengedwanso osati kumverera kwaubwenzi. Apa ndi pamene vuto likuyamba. Kodi mungatani kuti mukhale ndi ndani? Ndipotu, zikuoneka kuti mtsikanayo amakonda onse awiri, m'njira zosiyanasiyana.
Ndipotu, m'pofunikira, koposa zonse, kumvetsetsa kuti msungwanayo akhoza kukana. Ndipo kuchokera kwa wina iye akuyenerabe kusiya. Ngakhale ngati mmodzi wa anyamatawa akupereka ubwenzi, ndipo amavomereza, ubwenzi wake udzakhala wovuta kwa iye komanso kwa iye. Makamaka ngati iye amodzimodzi ndi kumverera sikudzatha mu chaka, osati awiri.
Pankhaniyi, nkofunikira kumvetsetsa amene akuwopa kuti adzatayika kwambiri. Ndipo, chofunika kwambiri, chomwe chili chofunikira kwa iye ndi ubwenzi wa munthu uyu kapena kukhalapo kwake m'moyo, monga munthu wofunika kwambiri. Komabe, bwenzi labwino likhoza kupezeka, ngakhale kuti lidzakhala lovuta. Koma ngati izi zikutanthauza kuti munthu uyu ndiye chikondi chake, ndiye kuti m'kupita kwa nthawi, amayamba "kumumenya." Ndicho chifukwa chake muyenera kumvetsa yemwe mumamukonda. Maganizo athu nthawi zina amasanganikirana ndi kusokonezeka, koma ngati mumvetsera nokha ndikuyankha mafunso onse moona mtima, ndiye kuti mukhoza kumvetsetsa nokha. Amayi ena amapita kwa katswiri wa zamaganizo kuti akonze zochitika zawo ndi kusankha bwino. Inde, izi ndi zosankha, koma inu mukhoza kuzilingalira nokha.
Choyamba muyenera kumvetsetsa chifukwa chake muli pachibwenzi ndi mnyamata, ndipo chifukwa chake mukuyandikira kwachiwiri. Mwinamwake msungwana sakufuna kuti alole maloto ake kapena akuwopa kusintha kwakukulu. Amafuna kuti achinyamata onse akhale pafupi ndi nthawi yomwe atsala pang'ono kusankha. Koma, wina sangathe kudikira kosatha. Izi zimayambitsa mikangano ndi kusagwirizana komwe kumayambitsa kupweteka. Choncho, tifunikira kulingalira kuti chigamulocho chiyenera kutengedwa pano ndi tsopano ndikudziyankha nokha, yemwe adzafunikanso kusankha ngati funso "limakhala pamphepete." Pamene tiyikidwa pamtunda, timayankha moona mtima komanso moona mtima. Kuti musamazunze mmodzi mwa achinyamata mwachabe, ndikofunikira kuti mukumva izi ndikudziyankha nokha, zomwe ndizofunika komanso zodula. Zili ngati munthu, osati ngati bwenzi.
Ndiponso, ngakhale mtsikanayo asanaganizepo za ukwatiwo, adzalingalira kuti ndani akuwona tsogolo lake. Ndi yani mwa anyamata amene akufuna kuti amange nawo moyo. Ndani adzamuvutitse iye zaka zingapo, ndi yemwe iye sangathe kumasula mpaka mapeto ake. Mayi atayankha mafunso amenewa moona mtima, amadziwa kuti anyamata ndi awa ndi osakhalitsa. Zoonadi, zonse zimasiyana m'moyo, ndipo atsikanawo amasintha, malingaliro awo ndi zofunikira zawo zimasintha. Koma, komabe, ngati munthu ali woyenera pa zonse zomwe aliyense wa ife angakhazikitse, ndiye chiwerengero chochepa cha zomwe iye sakonda kwenikweni munthu yemwe ali womasuka ndi womasuka tsopano. Amayi ena amantha kwambiri kukonzekera zam'tsogolo ndikuganiza miyoyo yawo zaka zingapo. Kawirikawiri iwo ali olondola, koma, kwina, ngati sikutheka kupanga chisankho, muyenera kuyang'ana zam'tsogolo ndi kulingalira moyo wanu ndi wina ndi mzake. Pambuyo podziwa yemwe akuwonekera pakhomo pakhomo ndi khumi, mukhoza kusankha chomaliza.
Inde, mwinamwake mtsikana, pamapeto pake, asiye kukonda wina ndi mzake. Mu moyo, palidi zonse. Komabe, ngati munthu akuganiza za kusankha pakati pa anthu awiri okondedwa kwambiri, ndiye pakali pano, malingalirowa ndi enieni ndipo vuto liyenera kuthetsedwa pano ndi pano. Apo ayi, izo zidzasanduka snowball, kumene ambiri angathe kuvutika.
Tonsefe, kuyesera kumanga ubale, nthawi ndi nthawi, timakumana ndi vuto la kusankha. Wina amathetsa mwamsanga, wina pang'onopang'ono, wina akulondola, ndipo wina akulakwitsa. Inde, nthawi zonse muyenera kuyesetsa kusankha njira yotsatirayi. Choncho, nthawi zonse muyenera kuganizira zomwe zingakhale zabwino kwa inu nokha. Ndipo si za kudzikonda. Mwachidule, pankhani ya chikondi, simusowa kuti aliyense azikhala wabwino. Mu katatu wachikondi, wina adzakhala akudwala nthawi zonse. Koma, ngati muwona kuti wina akuyembekezera ndikuchita mwaulemu, koma wina osati chizoloŵezi chomwe mungafunikire kuchichotsa, ndiye muyenera kuyesa pambali zokayikira ndikuchita zomwe mtima ukukuuzani.