Tsopano mawu akuti "zovuta" amagwiritsidwa ntchito ndi anthu ambiri, koma si onse omwe amadziwa tanthauzo lake. Woyamba pa maofesiwa adalankhula Karl Jung, ndipo ndiye amene adayambitsa mawuwo. Malinga ndi Young, zovutazo ndi "kuwonetsa maganizo ndi malingaliro omwe atembenuzidwanso ku chidziwitso". Mwa kuyankhula kwina, zovutazo ndizogwirizana ndi momwe munthu akumverera ndi zomwe munthu amanena, zolinga zake, mayanjano, zonse zomwe zimakhala ndi zotsatira zenizeni pamaganizo a munthu ndi umunthu wake.
Kuvuta kumatha kuyerekezera ndi bala lotseguka: ndibwino kuti likhale losokoneza, ndipo munthu ayamba kukhala womasuka komanso osasamala, akhoza kukhala wosasokonezeka, kusonyeza kuti ali ndi nkhanza kapena, poyera, akudzipatula yekha. Kuchita koteroko, komwe kumayambitsidwa ndi makompyuta, kumakhala ngati khoma losaoneka lomwe limalepheretsa njira ya ufulu, salola munthu kukhala wamphamvu ndi wodziimira. Komabe, maofesiwa ali ndi zinthu zosiyana: mbali imodzi, chifukwa cha iwo munthu amakhala osatetezeka komanso opanda chitetezo pamaso pa dziko lalikulu, koma, mbali ina, maofesi angathandize kukhala odzikweza.
Kupanga maofesi
Nchifukwa chiyani timayesetsa kwambiri kuchotsa zovutazo? Chowonadi ndi chakuti ndi munthu wodzala ndi zovuta zosiyanasiyana, zimakhala zovuta kulankhulana: akhoza kusagwirizana ndi mawu ena ndi zochita za anthu ena. Kawirikawiri, anthu osokonezeka ayamba kukayikira, kaduka, kusakhuta, kudzikweza, kunyenga ... Ndi chifukwa chake anthu ena sakonda.
Kawirikawiri maofesi omwe timanyamula nawo pamoyo wathu, amapangidwa ali aang'ono. Mwachitsanzo, pofuna kuti mwana wake azidziwitsa mwana wake, nthawi zambiri amayi ake amamuuza kuti: "Ndiwe wamwano kwambiri, tawonani mtundu wa mabadi omwe uli m'chipinda chako, kuti uoneke kuti ndiwe wonyansa!" Kapena kwa mwanayo kachiwiri, wopusa, kachiwiri ndi masamu! Chitsanzo kuchokera kwa antchito abwino a Vasya! " Makhalidwe abwinowa amawonedwa ndi ana kwambiri, ndipo pakapita nthawi pali zovuta zazing'ono, zomwe zimangowonjezereka ndi zigawo zowonjezera - kusagwira ntchito kusukulu, kusakhoza kupeza chinenero chofanana ndi anzao, kukhala ndi maluso obisika ndi luso. Mu moyo wamtsogolo munthu woteroyo popanda kuzindikira akuyesa kupeza ndi "kukoka makutu" a kulungamitsidwa ku kugonjetsedwa kwawo, kufunafuna kutsimikizira kuti ali wotayika ndipo sangathe kuchita chirichonse. Chikhalidwe choterocho chimalepheretsa munthu kuti apite ku moyo wopambana kuzindikira.
Vuto lalikulu ndilo vuto lalikulu, chifukwa chakuti zovutazo zimapangidwa, pang'onopang'ono amaiwalika ndi kukakamizidwa kuti asadziwe zochitika zina. Choncho, munthu sangathe kugwirizana ndi zolephera zake ndi chitsimikizo chachikulu cha mavuto ake ndi zovuta. Ndipo ngati simukudziwa kuti mumenyane ndi chiyani, ndiye kuti mwatsala pang'ono kugonjetsedwa.
Kusalongosoka kovuta
Anthu omwe ali ndi zovuta zochepa amatsimikiza kuti ali oipitsitsa kuposa ena ndipo amadziyika okha kulephera. Iwo amaganiza kuti ngati ali "oipa", ndiye kuti palibe chikondi, kuyamikira ndi kulemekeza. Kufuna mtendere wamtendere ndikuchotsa malingaliro awo oponderezedwa, anthu omwe ali ovuta kumvetsa amayesa kudzikonza okha mwanjira ina, kuchita zabwino kwa ena, potero amayesera kuwonekera mwabwino kwa anthu ndi kusonyeza kuti ali abwino, kuposa momwe ziriri kwenikweni. Koma zimachitika kuti pofuna kukondweretsa ena, munthu woteroyo amapita ku chinyengo. Mwa njira zonse, munthu wolemekezeka amayesera kusonyeza kupambana kwake ndi kukhutira muzochitika zonse za moyo. Iye akhoza kuyesa kugula zinthu zokwera mtengo zokha, magalimoto, mafoni, ngakhale atagwiritsa ntchito ndalama yake yomaliza pa iwo kapena kukwera ku ngongole; sangathe kuchoka pa masewera olimbitsa thupi kuti athe kuwonetsa anthu oyandikana nawo mavoti awo owuma ndi kuona maonekedwe owoneka bwino; akhoza kudzitama kumanzere ndi kulondola kwa chiwerengero cha chikondi chake kapena kuti amadziwana bwino ndi pulezidenti ... Komabe, nthawi zambiri fanizo la munthu wodzikhutira ndizosautsa. Ndipo ngati chinyengochi chimasokoneza, vuto loperewera lidzaphuka mu mtundu wobiriwira ndipo munthuyo adzakhala ndi mavuto ndi kuyanjana ndi ena, ntchito, ndi anthu apamtima.
Paunyamata, vuto losauka limabuka kawirikawiri chifukwa cha mavuto aliwonse ooneka, chifukwa cha mphamvu zowonongeka kwa makolo, kapena, mosiyana, osasamalira mwanayo kuchokera kwa achibale ndi makolo poyamba. Kusokoneza maganizo kumatsutsanso kwambiri achinyamata, kunyalanyazidwa kwa aphunzitsi ndi anzanga, kukhumudwa maganizo (mwachitsanzo, kusudzulana kwa makolo, imfa ya okondedwa) analandira ali mwana. Nthawi zonsezi zikhoza kukhala chifukwa cha kusakhutira ndi inu nokha, kuti zolakwa zanu zikhoza kupambanitsidwa kwambiri. Izi zimapangitsa kuti mwanayo ayambe kukonza pa zolephera zake, kuwala kumakula mwa iye mwakuya komanso pamene munthu akukula timapeza munthu wovutika kwambiri.
Wachijeremani Wachijeremani Alfred Adler, yemwe poyamba anagwiritsa ntchito mawu akuti "kudzichepetsa," ankakonda kunena kuti: "Kuti munthu ayambe kukhala munthu wamphumphu, ayenera kukhala wovuta kwambiri." Ndipo izo ziridi kwenikweni. Komabe, mawonetseredwe a zovutazi samalola munthu kukhala mwamtendere ndi iye yekha ndikupeza mgwirizano. Kodi mungadziwe bwanji ngati muli ndi zovuta? Belu yoyamba ikhoza kukhala yowopsya kwambiri kuoneka kwake. Ngati simukukhutira ndi mawonekedwe a mutu wanu, makulidwe a milomo, kukula kwa mphuno, kutalika, kutalika kwa mphuno, ndi zina zotero, ndiye kuti mulibe zovuta. Komanso kusakhutira ndi udindo wake wa zachuma, chikhalidwe cha anthu, machitidwe ake omwe amaluso amachitira za kukhalapo kwake.
Koma azimayi ambiri akadali okhudzidwa kwambiri ndi maonekedwe awo. Miyezo yamakono ya kukongola, yomwe timaona m'magazini a masamba ophweka, malonda okopa malonda, ma TV, amachititsa akazi ambiri kuganiza kuti iwo ndi opanda ungwiro. Ngakhale kuti kukhala ndi zovuta zochepa mu gawo lokongola laumunthu zingatheke ndipo amuna awo amalephera, ngati akuphatikizidwa ndi mawu ofunika okhudza akazi. Zotsatira za zotupa zoterozo zikhoza kukhala, mwachitsanzo, kulakalaka kupopera milomo yanu kapena kupanga chifuwa kukula kwake.
Zovuta zambiri
Ngati munthu ali ndi zovuta zambiri, ndiye amakhulupirira kuti moyo wake unali woipitsitsa kuposa momwe ungakhalire. Kuti asokoneze maganizo awa ndi kuwaletsa, akhoza kumamatira kumalingaliro ndi ziganizo zomwe zimamuthandiza kuti amve zambiri. "Ndiroleni ine ndisathe kuchita ntchito ndi kupanga mabwenzi, koma ine ndine wa fuko lalikulu lomwe linagonjetsa fascism." Zolondola, ziyenera kuzindikiridwa, sizing'onozing'ono, ndipo zifukwa zomveka zowonetsera kuti zilibe mphamvu, koma zovuta siziyenera kuchitidwa, ndipo kusakhazikika kwake kwapadera kungapitirize kukongola ndi kuyamikira.
Zambiri za infantilism
Odziwika a zovutazi safuna kuganizira za mavuto akuluakulu. Iwo sakonda kupanga zisankho ndikudzipangira okha udindo. Iwo sali omasuka okha, omwe nthawi zambiri amachititsa zovuta pochita ndi achilendo ndi anthu ena. Mwachitsanzo, nthawi zambiri zimachitika kuti kudya ndi kumwa moledzeretsa ndi zotsatira zake. Ndipotu, kudziletsa nokha kapena kumwa nthawi ya kumwa mowa, muyenera kukhala munthu wokhutira wokhazikika, osati kukhala ngati mwana wamng'ono yemwe amachititsa chidwi ndi zomwe akufuna.
Milandu yapadera
Nthaŵi zina madokotala amadziŵa kuchokera kwa makasitomala awo zokhuza kukwaniritsa (kukwanira), pamene munthu mmodzi amadzidalira kudzikuza ndi kupusa. "Ndizosavuta kupeza munthu wochenjera kuposa iye mwini" - nthawi zina amanena mtundu, mwiniwake wopusa kwambiri komanso wosadziwa. Anthu otere nthawi zambiri amakhulupirira kuti amawadziwa bwino, ndipo amatsimikiza kuti malangizo a akatswiri si abwino kwa iwo, chifukwa palibe chimene chiyenera kuti chikhale changwiro. Kawirikawiri palinso zovuta za anthu osauka, zimakakamiza munthu, ziribe kanthu momwe aliri wolemera komanso wolemera, kuyesetsa kupeza chuma, kuzilemberatu mopitirira muyeso ndipo nthawi yomweyo amakhala wouma komanso wowawa.
Kusakhala ndi maofesi
Nkhaniyi ikakhala yovuta kwambiri. Pambuyo pake, ndiye munthu alibe chilakolako ndipo ayenera kusintha ndikukula. Nchifukwa chiyani mumasintha chinachake mwa inu nokha, yesetsani kuchita zabwino, ngati zonse zili bwino ndi inu? Kotero, ngati muli wokondwa kwambiri ndi inu nokha, taganizirani: muli bwino? Mwina ndi bwino kudziyang'ana nokha.