Anthu ambiri ali ndi vuto chifukwa cha manyazi. Wolemba zamaganizo wotchuka wa ku America dzina lake Bernardo Carducci, yemwe ndi mkulu wa bungwe lofufuza kafukufuku pa yunivesite ya Indiana, anachita phunziro lodziŵika bwino. Panali zaka 15 zapitazo chiwerengero cha anthu amanyazi chawonjezeka kuyambira 40 mpaka 48 peresenti. N'zosadabwitsa kuti anthu ambiri akufuna kudziwa momwe angaswe, kuthana ndi manyazi, kudzichepetsa.
Zifukwa za manyazi ndi kudzichepetsa
Kunyada ndi kudzichepetsa kungatenge mitundu yambiri. Kuchokera ku manyazi pang'ono muzochitika zatsopano, kuopa mantha kosatheka kwa anthu ndi nkhaŵa yaikulu. Ngati mupita kukambilana ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo, mwinamwake mudzamva mawu ofanana omwewa: "Ndikalankhule ndi gulu lalikulu la anthu, ndimamva zowawa. Ndikuopa kuti ndikunena zinthu zopusa zomwe ena amandiyang'ana ndichisoni kapena kunyoza. " Kwa ambiri, izi ndizozoloŵera. Timakhala tikudera nkhaŵa m'mene anthu ena amationera. Pambuyo pa zovuta za manyazi, sikuti amangokhalira kukayikira, komanso kunyoza - nkhanza. Kukonda kwathu tokha kumakhala kovulaza ngati wina atiyang'ana ife mopanda pake kapena kutsutsa mawu athu. Chokhumudwitsa chathu sichinthu chophweka kuti tiwatsimikizire. Kukhumudwa kwa maganizo kumayambitsa mantha a wina, ngakhale kuti ndi bwino. Izi ndizo, vuto lalikulu la anthu odzikonda okha ndilo kukana kutsutsidwa. Koma ndiwothandiza kwambiri kuti ukhale ndi umunthu wathunthu.
Chifukwa china cha kusatetezeka ndi manyazi ndikutengeka mtima - chilakolako cha nthawi zonse ndi chirichonse chikhale chabwino. Chifukwa cha zolephera zonse za moyo, munthu wotere amatsutsa, koposa zonse, mwiniwake: "Izo sizinagwire ntchito, chifukwa ndine wopusa, wopanda chiyembekezo." Ngakhalenso chifukwa cha kulephereka ndizo zifukwa zenizeni zomwe sizidalira munthu wamanyazi. Pofuna kupeŵa mtima wosangalatsa m'tsogolomu, anthu oterewa amapewa anthu atsopano ndi zochita zosadziŵika. Amaopa kuganiza kuti adzanyozedwa atsopano, zomwe zimakhudza kudzidalira kwawo. Chikhumbo chokhala chabwino pa chirichonse, ndithudi, ndi choyamika. Koma ziyenera kumveka kuti nthawizonse n'zosatheka kukhala zabwino kwambiri! Tifunika kukhala okonzeka kuti tipewe kuti tidzakhale ndi chidziwitso komanso nthawi yotsatira kuti tisinthe. Ndiwowona kuti anthu otsogolera mwaulemu ndi amanyazi, anthu-angwiro amadziganizira okha m'maloto awo monga mikango, nyenyezi, anthu olemera ndi opambana. Koma amawopa kuzindikira maloto awo, kuti asavutike.
Palinso anthu amodzi, amanyazi mwachilengedwe. Achita zimenezi kuyambira ali mwana ndipo ali otsimikiza ndi mtima wonse kuti manyazi ndi chizoloŵezi chachikhalidwe cha khalidwe. Iwo samayesetsa kuti asiye ndikugonjetsa manyazi awo, chifukwa iwo saganizira kuti khalidwe ili ndilo khalidwe loipa. Amazindikira mokwanira kuti akutsutsidwa, koma pazidzidzidzi amatha kumvetsa. Mwa njira, kudzichepetsa moona kumapangitsa ulemu kwa anthu ambiri.
Mmene mungagonjetse manyazi anu
Ngati simukufuna kupirira manyazi anu, ndipo mukufuna kukhala "mayi wachitsulo", ndiye muli ndi mapulogalamu apadera a maganizo anu. Kusinthika kwa dona wamng'ono wamanyazi kukhala mkango wamkazi wa kuwala kumafuna kulimba mtima ndi mphamvu, koma kwenikweni sizowoneka ngati zovuta momwe zingawonekere.
- Yambani kubadwanso kwatsopano ndi kukhazikitsidwa kwa manyazi anu. Palibe cholakwika, kuti simungathe kupeza chotsutsana ndi nthabwala zopusa. Mwinamwake muli ndi ubwino wanu, ndizo zomwezo ndi kuziganizira.
- Mukamakambirana ndi anthu, yesetsani kulipira kwambiri. Mverani zomwe ena akunena. Musazengereze kufunsa mafunso. Mwachitsanzo: "Kodi mukutanthauza chiyani pamene mukulankhula za ...", kapena "Chimene mumakonda kwambiri". Anthu ngati iwo ngati akufuna chidwi chawo. Ndipo mumagawana maganizo anu: "Ndikuganiza kuti ndizosangalatsa", "Ndikufuna kudziwa zambiri za izi". Izi ndi njira zowonetsera zokambirana. Ndipo luso ili liri mkati mwa mphamvu zanu.
- Kuchita nawo zokambirana, onetsetsani kuti mukufunsa mafunso ndipo mvetserani mwatcheru. Kusokoneza mulimonsemo sikutheka! Wothandizira aliyense amasamala chidwi ndi munthu wake. Chifukwa chake, adzakuchitirani chifundo.
- Khalani woyambitsa zokambirana zachangu. Ndi zophweka kwambiri! Mukagula magazini yofiira, musawononge ndalama kwa wogulitsa ndipo musathamange monga mwa nthawi zonse. Limbikitsani wogulitsa, ponyani mawu angapo okhudza nyengo. Pa ulendowu, tamandani chovala cha mnzako. Iye, ndithudi, adzasangalala. Chifukwa cha zovuta zoterezi, mumapanga malo abwino.
- Ganizirani mavuto ofunika a anthu ena ngati mutha kuthandizapo kanthu. Simudzazindikira momwe mukuiwala za manyazi anu. Simungakhale ndi nthawi yochita mantha.
- Musakane zopereka kuti mukhale ndi anzanga omwe mumakhala nawo bwino. Musaope kuti mukhale nokha. Ngati wina akukuitanani, zikutanthauza kuti anthu anu akusangalala nawo.
- Phunzirani kuvomereza mwakachetechete kukana kwa wina. Pakhoza kukhalapo nthawi imene wina sakufuna kulankhula nanu, samachita zomwe mukuyesera kuti muyankhule. M'malo molimbana ndi munthu uyu, ndi bwino kulankhulana ndi anzako ndi kufotokozera: "Iye akuvutika maganizo", kapena: "Iye ndi wamwano basi."
- Dzikhazikitse zolinga zenizeni. Musati mudzilonjeze nokha kuti sabata ino ndithudi idzakhale nyenyezi pa kanema wa pa televizioni. Mmalo mwake, lonjezerani kuti mubwere ku phwando ndikuyankhulana ndi anthu osachepera awiri. Yambani pang'ono kuti mukwaniritse zambiri!
- Khalani katswiri pamunda uliwonse. Mwachitsanzo, khalani odziwa mabuku a ku Finnish zamakono ... Ndikofunika kuti mukhale ndi lingaliro lofunika komanso lapadera. Anthu enawo akhoza kuphunzira chinachake chatsopano kuchokera kwa inu.
"Yang'anirani nkhani." Muyenera kudziwa zomwe zikuchitika panthawiyi, mumzinda wanu komanso kuntchito. Iyi ndi nkhani zomwe zimakonda kwambiri kukambirana.
- Kumbukirani zochitika zosangalatsa, zimene mwangoyamba kuzichitira. Ngakhale nkhani inakuchitikirani. Awuzeni anzanu. Poona kuti ndinu wokambirana bwino, anthu ayesa kukuyankhulani.
- Werengani mabuku apadera. Panthawi yomwe yotchuka kwambiri ndi buku la Philip Zimbardo, yemwe ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo wa ku America, anati: "Manyazi. Ndi chiyani? Mmene mungagwirire ndi izi? ".
Kumbukirani kuti chinthu chofunika kwambiri pa maphunziro a chidziwitso ndizolimbikitsa kusintha khalidwe. Palibe chozizwitsa cha njira zomwe zimatsimikizira zotsatira. Kuti mupirire manyazi, mukufunikira ntchito yanu nthawi ndi tsiku. Koma chifukwa cha ntchito yosasinthasintha ndi yotsatirika payekha, posakhalitsa mumakhala otsimikiza kwambiri.
- Dziwani mphamvu zanu ndi zofooka zanu.
- Yesani khalidwe ndi zochita, osati umunthu wa munthuyo. Ikani mfundo iyi kwa inu nokha ndi anthu ena. M'malo mwake: "Zimene ndimapusa" ndikudziuza nokha "Ndinali wopusa bwanji". Mawu omaliza akusonyeza kuti nthawi yotsatira mukamachita bwino.
- Lembani mndandanda wa zofooka zanu, koma mwa njira yapadera. Pa vuto lililonse, pezani zotsutsana zomwe zingasonyeze mphamvu zanu. Mwachitsanzo: "Kodi ndikudalira chiyani", ndiyeno "Ndimathandiza anthu nthawi zonse, ngakhale asayamikire ntchito yanga." Kapena: "Kodi ndimayiwala chiyani" - "Osati wokondwa."
- Fufuzani zifukwa za zofooka zanu osati mwa inu nokha, koma muzinthu zakunja zomwe sizidalira inu. Mwachitsanzo: "Ntchito yanga siyadutsa, chifukwa bwana amamvera chisoni antchito a abambo."
- Tengani nthawi yopuma. Mwatsopano ndi kupumula mumamvetsa bwino interlocutor.
- Ganizirani zomwe mukufuna kuchokera kwa anthu ena komanso zomwe mungapatse. Pezani zomwe mungathandize ndi kuthandiza ena kuthetsa vuto lofunika. Komanso, musataye thandizo la ena. Kupatulapo kupatula, ngati thandizo likuwoneka muzinthu zamagulu.
- Musamadzikakamize kuti mukhale ndi anthu omwe simukumva nawo. Monga akunena, iwo adzatenga kuchokera kwa inu kuposa momwe angaperekere. Ngati simungathe kusintha mkhalidwewo, malire mauthenga kuti akhale osachepera.
- Kukhumudwa ndi kupsinjika mtima ndi mbali ya miyoyo yathu. Mukungoyenera kuvomereza izi. Musakhumudwitsidwe ndi dziko lonse lapansi. Izi zimachitika osati kwa inu nokha, koma ndi anthu onse padziko lapansi. Kumbukirani kuti pambuyo pa gulu lakuda, zoyera zidzabwera ndithu.
- Khalani ndi zolinga zam'tsogolo m'moyo. Koma sitepe iliyonse pa njira yopita ku maloto anu, konzekerani kanthawi kochepa. Mutha kuyesa kupita patsogolo ndikulimbikitseni pa gawo lotsatira. Poona kuti m'moyo moyo umatha, kudzidalira kwanu ndi kudzidalira kwanu kudzawonjezeka.
- Phunzirani kusangalala ndi zomwe muli nazo. Zikondwerero zing'onozing'ono, monga chakudya chokoma, filimu yosangalatsa, kuyamika, kupereka mphamvu zambiri ndi kulimbitsa mtima wabwino pa moyo.
Mutatha, ponyani manyazi anu, kudzichepetsa - mukhoza kukwaniritsa zambiri m'moyo. Komabe, samalirani kuti pakufuna kukhala ndi chidaliro simungakhale wodzidalira, wosasamala komanso wosayanjanitsika.