Ndipo patapita kanthawi zimakhala zosiyana kwambiri, zosasinthasintha, nthawi ndi nthawi zimayambitsa zonyansa, ndipo nthawi zonse zimakudandaula. Wotchedwa chirichonse: supu yotentha kwambiri, sungapeze masokosi, ndipo ngakhale kuti ali ndi mavuto kuntchito nayenso, iwe. Chotsatira chake, simungathe kupirira ndikuchitapo kanthu pakusakanizidwa, mwano mwaukali, pamene akukukozani inu mu kama. Ndipo chodabwitsa kwambiri, pambuyo pa chiwonongeko, amasonyeza ubwino wodabwitsa komanso wosadziwika mu kugonana, ngakhale kuti nthawi zambiri sali pabedi. Ndingafotokoze bwanji izi?
Akatswiri ambiri amaganizo amaitana anthu omwe amakangana ndi chifukwa chogonana - mkwiyo. Kwa atsikana omwe agwirizanitsa miyoyo yawo ndi zoterezi, pali nkhani ziwiri, komabe zimakhala zomveka, koma zabwino ndi zoipa.
Tiyeni tiyambe ndi zoipa. Gnevoliki ndi ofanana ndi obetisti. Ndiwo okhawo amene amasangalala ndi zovala zamkati, zidole ndi zinthu zina, ndi mtundu wa amuna wokwiya - kuchokera ku zonyansa. Ndipo ngati nthawi iliyonse amapeza mikanganoyo imapangitsa iwo kukhala abwino kusiyana ndi aliyense akuyambitsanso, ndiye posachedwa malo a preludes adzakhala ndi mikangano. Vuto lanu ndilo kuti patapita kanthawi mudzasiya kuyesedwa ndi chilakolako cha kugonana, chifukwa chomwe chimapangitsa munthu wanu - sakukulimbikitsani. Ndipo inu mulibe mphamvu yokana. Mukhoza, mutembenuzire kwa katswiri yemwe, pogwiritsa ntchito chithunzi cholondola cha moyo wa kugonana, ayesa kuthandiza. Koma ngakhale kukambirana kwa nthawi yaitali mu ofesi nthawi zambiri kumathera ndi kubwereranso ku zolembedwa zapitazo zogonana.
Uthenga wabwino ndi kuzindikira kwaumunthu za vuto ndi chikhumbo chochikonza. Mkwiyo wotere ukhoza kuchiritsidwa. Ndipo chofunika kwambiri, sikuti nkhanza zanu zonse zimatha pa kugonana, ambiri mwa iwo mumasiya kukambirana momasuka.
Sayansi ya "sexology" inachititsa chidwi ichi dzina losiyana - "Nero Complex". Nero ndi mfumu ya Roma yemwe adagwiritsa ntchito makangano ndi kulira kuonjezera kugonana kwake. Pambuyo pa zoopsa zowopsya zomwe mfumu inaziwona mwa mkazi wake - mlendo, zomwe zinali patsogolo pake zinali zatsopano zogonana, zomwe zinakopa kwambiri kuposa mkazi wake. Akatswiri ena amadzifotokozeranso zochitikazi mwa kuwonjezera testosterone pamakangano, zomwe zimathandizanso kuwonjezereka maganizo.
Vuto ndi mkwiyo ndikuti amalota mkazi "wakugwa" kuyambira ali mwana. Pambuyo pake, si chinsinsi kuti chifaniziro cha ophunzira olemekezeka nthawi zambiri chimakondweretsa amuna, koma atsikana osasangalatsa amachita chilakolako chosalamulirika. Koma, monga lamulo, amuna amathera nthawi ndi ena, ndikukwatirana ndi ena, abwino komanso okondeka. Vuto limabwera pamene mwamuna ayamba kuzindikira kuti mkazi wake wabwino samayambitsa chilakolako cha kugonana mwa iye. Chifukwa cha mantha omwe amachititsa abambo ake kugwira ntchito, amapita ku "butterfly" yoyamba ndipo nthawi yomweyo amadziwa kuti zonse ziri bwino, chifukwa vuto silili mwa iye, koma mwa mkazi wake. Amuna ambiri, ataphunzira za kusagwirizana kumeneku, patapita zaka zingapo amasiya akazi awo, ndipo ena, okonda akazi awo, akuyang'ana njira zonse zotheka kukondwera ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wawo. Ndipo pakutsutsana kumeneku amapeza kuti mkaziyo ali ndi udindo wopanduka - ichi ndi chifaniziro chogonana kwambiri, komanso mowonjezereka. Amamukweza mkaziyo pabedi, ndipo nthawi yotsatira imagwiritsa ntchito kukangana monga chifukwa chogonana. Kwenikweni osalingalira za zomwe theka lina lingaganizire zowonongeka kotere.
Mwina, kukangana ngati nthawi ya kugonana kumakhala kosangalatsa komanso koyesa, ngati_kuchitika mosayembekezereka, mwachisawawa komanso kawirikawiri. Nthawi zina, amuna amachititsa kuti thupi la mkazi liwonongeke, ndipo nthawi zambiri amadziwa izi. Amayesa kuthetsa nkhanza zawo ndi caress ndi chisamaliro pamoyo wa tsiku ndi tsiku, nthawi zina ngakhale ndi mphatso zamtengo wapatali.
Akatswiri a zamaganizo amanena kuti mtundu wotero monga mkwiyo, makamaka umakhudza amayi. Amamverera kuti sakuwakhulupirira, kusamvetsetsa, kupsa mtima ndi mkwiyo. Chifukwa cha ichi chingakhale kulera kwa bambo wosungulumwa kapena mayi wopanda chikondi. Zotsatira zake, mwanayo amakula misogynist. Koma, popeza sangakane akazi, amayamba kuseka naye pabedi. Mwa kuyankhula kwina, mawonekedwe a psyche akuvutika ali ndi zigawo ziwiri: 1) osakonda akazi ambiri 2) kufooka kwa kugonana
Ngati mulibe mwayi ndipo muyenera kugawira bedi ndi mkwiyo, kumbukirani kuti bata lanu silidzatengedwa ngati golidi. Mukasankha wokondedwa, simungaganize kuti mutha kupeza "chimwemwe" choterocho. Panthawi yochepa iwo adamuzoloŵera, ndipo mutaphunzira za chikhumbo chake, simungathe kuyanjana naye? Ndiye musati muwopsye ngati ngati, patapita nthawi, mutatopa nkhani zonse za mikangano, iye ayamba kukukozani inu chifukwa cha zinthu zopanda pake. Musadzithamangire nokha ndi dona wachitsulo, mkazi aliyense amene akuseka nthawi yaitali adzasiya malo ake ndi kuthawa. Ngati mukufuna kukhala, ndiye kuti mukufunika kuyang'ana.
Choyamba, dziwani chomwe chimayambitsa vuto, ndiko kuti, ndi mtundu wanji wa munthu wanu. Ngati muli olemekezeka kwambiri ndipo musadzilole kuti mukhale pabedi (zovuta zosiyana, zovulaza zamlomo), ndiye kuti munthu wanu akhoza kupulumutsidwabe. Vutoli ndi lovuta kwambiri, ndipo iwe, monga mkazi wanzeru, uyenera kufufuza zolakwa zawo. Ngati muwona kuti mwamuna wanu amasankha zolimba kwambiri, ndiye musonyeze kuti mwakonzeka kukwaniritsa zolinga zake komanso popanda kukangana. Valani zovala zamkati zabwino ndikukhala molimba mtima. Posachedwapa amvetsetsa kuti kukangana kumeneku kungakhale kosafunika kwenikweni.
Ngati mwamuna wanu ali ndi misogynist, zidzakhala zovuta kwambiri kuti musinthe chinachake. Choyamba, onetsani kuti mumamukonda ndipo simunamuperekere, kumupangitsa kukhulupirira, kapena kunena bwino kuti mukufuna mwana kuchokera kwa iye. Inde, sikukhala kovuta kumuswa munthu wotere, koma zonse ndizotheka. Monga njira yowonjezera, funsani katswiri. Ndipo musalole kuti manja anu apite msanga, chifukwa chilichonse chomwe chili padziko lapansi chingasinthidwe. Monga cholimbikitsira, zikhale kwa inu kuti mkwiyo suli wotchuka komanso wodziwika bwino, zomwe zikutanthauza kuti vuto liri ndi yankho, mwinamwake amayi sakanakhala chete pa izo.