Kodi timatenga gawo lachitatu ndani: mwamuna kapena mkazi?
Pakhoza kukhala njira ziwiri: mkazi kapena mwamuna. Kwenikweni, ngati pempho la kugonana limachokera kwa munthu, iye amadziwonetsa yekha kukhala ndi amayi awiri okongola omwe amakwaniritsa zokhumba zake zonse. Mwamuna, monga mwamuna weniweni, sangakwanitse kuona momwe mkazi wake amakhudzidwira ndi mwamuna wina, motero njira ya MFM kwa amuna ambiri imangokhalako. Izi zikutanthauza kuti malamulo amatsatiridwa ndi malingaliro ambiri amunthu: Egoism (chilakolako choti atsikana onse azisamaliridwa yekha), malingaliro amodzi (kusafuna "kugawana" mkazi wake ndi mwamuna wina) ndi kunyada komwe kungapweteke ndi zomwe zikuchitika (pambuyo pake, mkaziyo akhoza kugonana ndi wina munthu). Malinga ndi ambiri, kugonana pa kusiyana kwa MZHM kwa mwamuna kungakhale kolandiridwa kokha ngati abwenzi awiri (kapena anzanu okha) amapeza mkazi wosakudziwa bwino ndipo amakhala naye pabedi. Palibe kudzipatulira, palibe mboni, komanso chofunikira kwambiri - mkazi uyu alibe chidwi kwenikweni ndi munthuyo ndipo saziwerengera ndi katundu wake.
Kawirikawiri mwamuna yemwe amachitira chiwerewere kwa mkazi (mkazi), amachititsa kuti akhale wachitatu, kapena kuti wachitatu, chibwenzi kapena mnzake. Mwachidziwikire, mkazi aliyense amavomereza kuvomereza kotero, ngati pempho lolola mwamuna wake kusintha ndi bwenzi lake pamaso pake. Kukambirana koteroko sikungapangitse chabwino chilichonse, ndipo mkazi sakufuna ngakhale kuganiza za kugonana atatu pamodzi. Pachifukwa ichi, amuna, okalamba, "pitani" kumanzere, kuti muzindikire malingaliro awo popanda mkazi kutenga nawo mbali komanso popanda kudziwa kwake. Choncho, musanalole kugonana koteroko, muyenera kufufuza zinthu zonse bwino ndikufika potsutsana ndikupeza mnzanu kapena mnzanu pa zosangalatsa za kugonana. Musalole kukhala mnzanu (yemwe angasankhe kuti achite ntchitoyi, tidzakambirana pang'ono), ndipo mwachitsanzo, mkazi wosadziwika bwino.
Ngati chiphunzitsochi chimapereka mzake kwa mkazi (kapena maloto a zosangalatsa), ndiye apa ndizo zodziwika bwino, mwinamwake, akudziwona yekha atazungulira ndi amuna awiri, mwina ngakhale osadziwika bwino. Ngakhale, monga momwe chiwerengero cha kafukufuku wosadziwika, chikusonyezera, amayi ambiri ali ndi manyazi poyankhula za kugonana ndi amuna awiri ndikuchita ndi amuna awiri. Iwo amasonyeza kuti ndi chisangalalo iwo amavomereza zokakamiza kugonana muzithunzi ZHMZ kuposa MZHM. Kwa mkazi, makamaka ngati ali wokhutira ndi maonekedwe ake ndi chiwonetsero, kugonana koteroko sikungosangalatse zokondweretsa zokha, komanso kudzimvera. Tikhoza kupeza chitsimikizo kuti ndi mkazi yekha yemwe sakhutitsidwa ndi iye mwini yekha amene angathe kusiya mchitidwe wa kugonana kwa MZHM. Kapena yemwe amaona kuti kugonana koteroko ndi koyipa komanso kosakhala kwachikhalidwe, ngakhale kuti njirayi kuti amai azigonana m'maulendo atatu sakanafika pamutu pawo.
Chachitatu?
Ndani kwenikweni amene angasankhe kuti akhale gawo lachitatu? Kuyankhula za mtundu wa ZHMZH, tikhoza kunena kuti nthawi zambiri abambo amalimbikitsa kuti atenge nawo amzake a mkazi wake kapena omwe amadziwa bwino. Kawirikawiri amuna amalankhula za mkazi wina payekha pamene iwo akufuna kuti agone naye popanda kutenga nawo mbali. Ndi bwino kuyambitsa kufufuza ndi anzanu apamtima, mwawonana wina ndi mzake m'moyo wanu ndipo sizikudziwika ngati mudzawona kapena osatha nthawi yopuma. Komanso mukhoza kufufuza gawo lachitatu kapena lachitatu pa intaneti. Chibwenzi choterechi chimakonda kwambiri masiku ano. Ngakhale amayi ndi atsikana akuyembekezera zambiri zokhudzana ndi kugonana, zimakhala zophweka. Atsikana aang'ono nthawi yomweyo amavomereza zofalitsa zomwe zatumizidwa pa intaneti ndikupita kulankhulana. Mwamuna ndi wosavuta kupeza, koma palinso zofunikira zochepa zogonana mu MJM. Njirayi imakhala ndi zina zomwe simungathe kukhulupirira kwathunthu mnzanu kapena mnzanu wosadziwika, muyenera kusamala ndi owerenga, muyenera kugwiritsa ntchito kondomu ndi njira zina zotetezera. Mwinanso, mungathe kudutsa kafukufuku wamankhwala kuti musakhale ndi chidaliro pa ukhondo ndi thanzi lawo.
Kwa ambiri, maseŵera ndiyeso nthawi imodzi, ena amachita izo kangapo. Kuti mukhale okondweretsa, ndi bwino kuti zikhale zozikidwa ndi chidaliro chonse pakati pa abwenzi ndi chifundo chachikulu.