Mwinamwake, aliyense wa ife ankadabwa chifukwa chake anthu ena ndi okoma mtima komanso abwino, koma wina ayenera kunyozetsa ndi kumunyoza munthu kuti alandire mtundu wina wa zosangalatsa zachilendo. Kodi chifukwa cha khalidwe la anthu opusa amenewo ndi chiyani?
Mavuto
Ndi ochepa okha omwe adatha kukhala ndi moyo ndikukhala ndi moyo popanda zovuta. Pali anthu amodzi okhawo. Kwenikweni, zochitika zambiri ndi anthu omwe ali pafupi nafe amachititsa kuti anthu akhale ndi zovuta zomwe amamenyana nazo pamoyo wawo wonse. Kawirikawiri, otsutsa ndi omwe anali ofooka kuposa ena, omwe adanyozedwa, omwe adanyozedwa ndi kunyozedwa. Patapita nthaŵi, ana awa ndi achinyamata adakula, koma mphamvu ya manyazi imakhalabe nawo kosatha. Ndipo mmalo mosankha chinachake ndi kusintha chinachake, anthu opusitsa amayamba kudziyesa okha phindu la ena. Pamaso mwa ozunzidwawo, amasankha omwe ali ofooka pamakhalidwe, omwe sangathe kumenyana chifukwa amamukonda munthu wonyenga. M'makhalidwe a anthu opeputsa, sizingatheke kuti mupeze zoganiza. Iwo akhoza kuyamba kwenikweni kuchokera ku theka-kutembenukira muzochitika zomwe anthu ambiri sachita chidwi ndi zomwe zanenedwa. Ambiri amakhulupirira kuti anthu opeputsa amavutika ndi psyche, komanso sali ndi udindo pazochita zawo. Ndipotu, izi siziri choncho. Wosokoneza amamvetsetsa zomwe amachita, koma nthawi zambiri amadziphimba ndi matenda ena amalingaliro a maganizo ndi zina zotero. Ndi munthu woterewa, mulimonsemo, wina sayenera kupereka. Ngati akuyamba kunyozetsa ndi kunyoza, nkofunika kumenyana. Ngati simutero, wofunsirayo nthawi zonse adzatsimikiziridwa ndi ndalama zanu.
Kusadziwika
Chifukwa china chotsutsa za anthu ndi kukana zowona. Ndiko kuti, munthu amakhulupirira kuti iwo amene ali naye, amakhala moyo wosayenerera. Ali wokhumudwa kwambiri ndipo akuyesera kusinthira chilengedwe chake, m'malo mosiya njira yolankhulirana. Nthawi zambiri munthu wodandaula amakhala wotsimikiza kuti amadziwa yemwe ali bwino kuchita ndi choti achite. Ngati tipempha wopemphayo chifukwa chake adafuula mwamuna, amamuseka, amayankha mosakayika kuti anthu enieni ali ndi mlandu woti ayenera kukhala takobratsya. Wokhululukayo sangathe kuwona mavuto ake, koma nthawi zonse amazindikira ndi kuganizira mavuto a anthu ena. Mwachitsanzo, nthawi zambiri amanyazi muzhirugayutsya komanso amamenya akazi awo, chifukwa amakhulupirira kuti akusowa chinachake choti aphunzitse komanso kuti iwowo ndi omwe ali olakwa. Ndipotu, wofunsirayo sakhala womasuka ndi munthu wamba, yemwe ali ndi lingaliro lake. Chilengedwe chokhalira cholakwika chimalephereka, chifukwa sichidziwa momwe angakwaniritsire malire a dziko lawo la maganizo. Anthu omwe angathe kuchita izi sakhala otsutsa. Ngakhale ali ndi zovuta zina, amakumana nawo mosiyana, kupeza zatsopano, malingaliro atsopano ndi zina zotero. Ndi wogwidwa, zonse zimachitika mosiyana. Iye amapanga dziko lake laling'ono lomwe amakhazikitsa malamulo osasweka. Ndipo ngati wina akufuna kukhala osatsatira malamulo amenewa, wofunayo amamva kufunika kophunzitsa munthu maganizo ake. Panthaŵi imodzimodziyo, amatsutsana kwathunthu ndi mikangano, ngakhale atathandizidwa ndi malingaliro. Kwa munthu wopusa, chinthu chofunikira kwambiri nthawi zonse ndi kukhalabe wolondola. Kotero, pamene iye awona kuti zifukwa za winawake zingathe kukhumudwitsa ena, ndiye amakwiya kwambiri. Kwa iye, zili ngati vuto lina lodzidalira, lomwe lakhala lopanda kutero kuti popanda kugonjera ena, wofunirayo amamva chisoni komanso wosafunika.
Mosamala ndi mosadziwa
Zosokoneza zonse ndizodziwika bwino komanso zosadziwika. Ngati munthu amachita zinthu mopanda kuzindikira, ali ndi chikhulupiriro chokha, chomwe chimapangidwa ndi maofesi, malo ndi zina zotero. Munthu wotereyo amakhala woperewera nzeru. Iye samayesa kudzipenda yekha ndipo safuna kumvetsa chifukwa chake achibale ake ndi anthu apamtima amamutcha kuti wotsutsa ndi zina zotero. Anthu oterewa amangochita zinthu mwachangu pokhapokha mwa zolinga zabwino. Mwachidule, dziko lawo ndi laling'onong'onong'ono kwambiri, zovuta kwambiri ndi zochepa kwambiri kuposa za anthu ena. Ndipo pamene anthu ayamba kupita mopitirira malire, omverawa amafuula ndi kuopseza achibale kuti asakhale kanthu. Nkhani yowonongeka yotereyi ndi pamene abambo amaletsa ana awo kuchita chinachake, chifukwa ali otsimikiza kuti maphunziro amenewa sadzabweretsa zabwino. Komanso, zifukwa zilizonse zomwe anapatsidwa, amatha kukhala yekha, osamvetsera wina aliyense. Mwachidziwikire, otsutsa samamvetsera maganizo a wina. Ndicho chifukwa chake zimakhala zovuta kwambiri kuti afotokoze zambiri zokhudza khalidwe lawo. Koma ndikuyenera kuzindikira kuti iwo omwe amadzimva mopanda kuzindikira amatha kulapa kwambiri khalidwe lawo akamvetsetsa zomwe akuchita. Zochitika zoterozo ndizosawerengeka, komabe, zimachitika. Ndipo pamene munthu akuzindikira momwe amaopseza achibale ake ndi oyandikana nawo nthawi zonse, iye mwiniyo amanjenjemera ndi khalidwe lake, chifukwa chirichonse chimene iye sanachite, iye anachita motsimikiza kuti izo zikanakhala zabwinoko.
Gawo lachiwiri la opondereza ndi loipitsitsa kuposa loyamba, chifukwa anthu awa amadziwa bwino zomwe akuchita. Komanso, zimabweretsa chuma. Anthu oterewa ali ndi malo okwanira ndipo akhoza kukhala okhulupirika komanso ololera. Ambiri sazindikira kuti pafupi ndi iwo ndi enieni enieni. Wosokoneza, nayenso, samasonyeza nkhope yake yeniyeni, mpaka wina atapatsa pang'ono. Chisamaliro cha otsutsa otero ndikuti amazunza iwo amene amawakonda kapena omwe amawaopa iwo. Ndi munthu yemwe samva kulimbika mtima kwa wofunafuna, samangokhalira kupirira, chifukwa alibe mphamvu yothetsera mavuto. Koma munthu woopsya kapena wachikondi sangathe kupereka chidzudzulo choyenera ndipo nthawizonse amawopa kutayika a despot kapena kukhala wofunsira. Awa ndi chikhalidwe chachinyengo. Ndikuganiza kuti ambiri adawona momwe mnyamatayo amachitira chipongwe, ngakhale kumenyana ndi mtsikanayo, ndipo pamene ayesa kumudzudzula, ayamba kufuula kuti: "Khala chete, apo ayi ndikusiya, ndikusiya!". Uwu ndiwo mawonetsedwe owonetseratu omwe akudziwika bwino. Mwamunthu amamvetsetsa bwino lomwe zomwe amachita komanso amagwiritsa ntchito zofooka za yemwe amamunyoza. Otsutsa otero samasintha, chifukwa amachitira zinthu mosamala ndikusangalala nazo. Ndi munthu wotero ndizovuta kumenyana ndikuyesera kuimitsa mwanjira inayake, chifukwa ntchito yake yaikulu ndi kudzidalira pazinthu za ena pa mtengo uliwonse. Choncho, ngati mukakumana ndi munthu woterewa, musayesetse kumukakamiza kapena kutsegula maso anu ku zenizeni. Ndi bwino kungochokapo ndipo musalole kuti mukumva zowawa za wofunsira.