Mwatsoka, kukhulupirira sikukugwiritsanso ntchito makhalidwe omwe amapezeka kamodzi kokha. Izi zimasintha, choncho nkofunika kugwira ntchito nthawi zonse kuti muzitha kukambirana ndi kudana pakati pa okwatirana. Pangani kulakwitsa, khumudwa ndi kudzikakamiza kuti musamakhulupirire zosavuta kusiyana ndi kukhazikitsa chidaliro m'banja. Chifukwa chake, wina sayenera kuchitira chiyanjano ichi, chifukwa chikondi chili ngati nyumba ya masewera, ndipo chidaliro chake ndi mzere wotsika kwambiri, timachotsa mzere wa "kukhulupirira" - nyumba ya "chikondi" imagwa.
Momwe mungayambitsire kukhazikitsa ubale wodalirika, pamene simukupanga zolakwitsa, kuti musawawononge? Tili ndi yankho la funso ili.
Zifukwa za kusakhulupirika.
Kawirikawiri, kusakhulupirira kwa munthu kumayamba kuyambira pachiyambi cha chiyanjano. Kumbukirani momwe banja lanu linayambira? Kodi mumakhulupirira mawu onse a wokondedwa wanu kuyambira tsiku loyamba? Mulimonsemo, pangakhale dontho la kusakhulupirika kapena kukayikira poyamba. Sizinatheke mpaka pano, pakalipano, mutaphunzira kale wina ndi mzake, muli ndi zifukwa zambiri zokhulupirira ndikukhulupilira m'malo mokhulupirira. Ngati pazifukwa zina mnzanuyo wakupatsani chifukwa chokayika - chidaliro cha kugwa. Posachedwa dontho lidzakula m'nyanja, chifukwa chaichi kapena ayi. Zolakwa zonse zidzakhala malingaliro athu, malingaliro, ziganizo, ndi chirichonse chomwe chimadziwika "koma mwadzidzidzi." Ngati kale, mwamuna atachedwa kuntchito, tinazizindikira mofatsa komanso mwaulemu, mwachitsanzo, titawona kuti mwanjira ina amawoneka bwino ndi mkazi wokongola, makamaka ngati ali wantchito wake - chirichonse, "koma mwadzidzidzi "Iyamba kugwira ntchito. Ndipo tili ndi zozizwitsa zambiri, zomwe mwamuna wokondedwa "mwadzidzidzi" akugwira ntchito iliyonse, koma sagwira ntchito. Chifukwa chakumenyana kumeneku.
Nsanje ndi chifukwa china chosakhulupilira. Nsanje ndi chikondi zimaonedwa kuti ndizosasinthika, koma ndi anthu ochepa okha omwe sagwirizana kuti nsanje yofanana ndi yomweyi ingathe kuwononga maganizo oterewa. Nsanje, mmalo mwake, idzakhala yosasunthika kuchokera ku lingaliro la umwini ndi kusakhulupirira kwa wokondedwayo.
Ndiponso, chifukwa cha kusakhulupirika komwe kumabuka m'maganizo mwathu, ndizo ziphuphu. Ngakhalenso katatu osatchulidwa kapena osatchulidwe, akhoza kukula n'kukhala kugonana.
Chodabwitsa kwambiri, kuchokera m'mabodza, okwatirana amakhudzidwa kwambiri, omwe amakhulupirira kukhala mwamtendere ndi mogwirizana. Akatswiri a zamaganizo nthawi zambiri amaona kuti mabanja amenewa alibe kulankhulirana. Kawirikawiri m'mabanja otere silingaloledwe kudandaula za mavuto, kutsutsana zochita za wina ndi mzake, kupanga chisankho kapena kuwatsutsa. Mawiri omwe amatsutsana, amalankhulana zambiri ndi wina ndi mzake, pamene akulandira zambiri zowonjezera. Ndipotu, mikangano ndiyankhulana. Mwachidule, kuyankhulana uku ndikumangokhalira kuganiza komanso kumangokhalira kuthetsa okwatirana, zomwe zingachititsenso kuthetsa banja.
Chokhalira osakhulupirika chikhoza kuyambitsa mikangano, koma pakamakangana pali mwayi wopezera choonadi kusiyana ndi kunyamula mawu ndi kubisa maganizo.
Bwanji ngati chidaliro chikugwedezekabe?
Kudalira m'banja ndi kovuta, ndipo kumafuna kukhala ndi mtima wosasangalatsa. Nanga bwanji ngati simunamalize? Njira ziwiri: gwetsani manja anu ndi kukhala momwemo, mukuyang'anirana wina ndi mzake, kumanga malingaliro ambiri ndi zifukwa m'mutu mwanu, kapena kuyambira pachiyambi.
Zimakhala zobvuta kubwezeretsa chiyanjano chokhulupilira, chifukwa tsopano panopa mumakhala ndi malingaliro, omwe nthawi zambiri amalepheretsa kugwirizana.
Choncho, m'pofunikira kuyamba ndi kuchotsa zochitika. Pewani zoipa zonse zomwe zinali pamoyo wanu palimodzi, zodzaza ndi zokondweretsa komanso zosangalatsa, komanso chiyembekezo ndi zolinga zamtsogolo. Mu nthawi yobwezeretsa kukhulupilira m'banja, nkofunika kukhala osamala kwambiri, komanso kuti musayambe kutsutsana kwambiri. Simungathe kupeĊµa mikangano, chifukwa chakuti maganizo athu osadzidalira ndi osakayikira amachititsa kuti zinthu zikhale zosautsa, zomwe zidzasokoneza mantha. Ndipo mitsempha imayenera kupeza njira yotulukira. Chabwino, ngati mupeza phunziro limodzi lomwe lidzakusangalatsani inu nonse, ndipo panthawi yomweyi muzitsitsimutsa. Zitha kukhala masewera, kuvina, mtundu wina wa chilengedwe, nyimbo. Chinthu chachikulu chomwe inu munali pamodzi, ndipo panthawi ya phunziro munayanjana.
Ingokhalani ndi chidwi ndi bizinesi, mkhalidwe wa thanzi, zochitika za mnzanuyo, musamusiye yekha ndi mavuto. Gawani maganizo anu, malingaliro anu, funsani malangizo. Kawirikawiri pamene munthu apempha munthu kuti awathandize, amachita ndi munthu wodalirika amene maganizo ake ali ovomerezeka kwa iye. Mukakambirana ndi mnzanuyo, ngakhale pazochitika za tsiku ndi tsiku, mudzamulimbikitsanso ndizofunika kwambiri kwa inu, ndi kudalira kwanu.
Zambiri, lankhulani, pafupifupi chirichonse, kotero mutha kutseguka kwambiri kwa wina ndi mzake. Yambani, yongani, koma kuti mawu anu kapena zochita zanu zisakhumudwitse mnzanuyo. Nthawi zambiri kulankhulana kumakhudza. Ngati mukufuna kupambana chikhulupiliro cha mwamuna, mukhoza kukopera manja ake osadziwika, ndipo mwangozi mugwire mbali ya kumanzere ya thupi. Sungunulani chidutswa chowonekera cha fumbi kuchokera kumapewa ake akumanzere, kunong'oneza mawu ofatsa kumutu wakumanzere, kumpsompsona pa tsaya lakumanzere. Awa si matsenga, ndipo osati tsankho, mbali ya kumanzere ya anthu imakhala yotengeka kwambiri. Lolani kukhala chinsinsi chanu chaching'ono.
Ngati funso la momwe mungakhalire ndi chidaliro m'banja lanu lidali luso lapadera kwa inu, ngakhale mutayesetsa ndi zochita zanu, ndiye nthawi ya katswiri wa zamaganizo. Katswiri wa zamaganizo wathanzi adzakuthandizani kuthetsa vutoli pokhapokha atakhala vuto lalikulu. Chinthu chachikulu ndi chakuti chilakolako cha abwenzi kukhala pamodzi, ndikukhazikitsa mavuto onse. Pomwepo ndiye zotsatira zabwino.