"Osati lero, wokondedwa ..." Kupitiriza kwa mawuwa kumadziwika kwa ambiri a ife: "... Ndimatanganidwa kwambiri" (wotopa kwambiri, ndili ndi kupweteka mutu, osamva, ndinali tsiku lovuta ...) Ndipo tikudziwa mtengo wa zifukwa zoterezi. Koma moona mtima? Ndi chifukwa chiyani kwenikweni? Nanga bwanji ngati chilakolako cha kugonana chitayika ndipo sakufuna kubwerera?
ZINTHU ZINACHITIKA ...
Kumbukirani kuti zonsezi zinayamba bwanji? Nonse mwa inu munatentha mopanda mtima, muthamanga pa tsiku lirilonse pamapiko a chikondi, mumpsyopsyona ngati achinyamata mu mzere wotsiriza, mukukwiya ndi chilakolako, kumenyana zolemba zonse za mdziko. Koma, patapita nthawi, simukulolanso usiku wa "Africa" wamisala ndipo, mutabwerera kunyumba tsiku lovuta, musafulumire kudula zovala ndikugwirizanitsa chikondi chokondweretsa. M'malo mwake, mumakhazikika pampando wapamwamba ndi buku (kugwirana, katemera wokondedwa) ndikumva momwe wokonda wanu wokonda kale amakazungulira kwinakwake pafupi.
Ndipo chinthu chodabwitsa ndi chakuti mumakondana kwambiri ndipo mukufuna kukhala pamodzi. Simukukopa zokometsera zokometsera pambali. Mukukhutira ndi chilichonse kupatula ... chinthu chofunika kwambiri ndi kugonana. Komabe, ndani amene ananena kuti ichi ndi chinthu chofunikira kwambiri? Mwamuna ndi mkazi ali ogwirizana ndi zofanana, ana, kumvetsetsa, kumvetsetsa, potsiriza. Inde, zinthu zambiri! Ganizani, kugonana ...
Ndiye bwanji mukukwiyitsidwa kwambiri kuti mupeze kuti simunayambe kutenthedwa ndi chilakolako chogonana choyambirira, musati muwononge kukhudza kwa mwamuna wanu wokondedwa? Nchifukwa chiani anakhumudwa pamene akukupemphani kuti muyambe kukondana, munayankhenso kuti mudali kale "dzulo"?
CHIKONDI CHA CHIKONDI
Mabanja ambiri amamvetsera kuti pa nthawi inayake ya chiyanjano cha chikondi chikondi chimayamba kufooka. Ndipo, ngati simutenga nthawi yeniyeni, zingakhale zakuphatikizana kwathunthu kapena kugonana. Apa pali chitsanzo chochokera ku moyo.
Mwamuna ndi mkazi (tiyeni tiwatche iwo Aroma ndi Svetlana) ali okwatira kwa zaka zisanu. Posachedwapa amagonana "m'njira yokambirana". Bukuli limasonyeza kuti Sveta, pansi pa zifukwa zomveka, amakana. Aroma amapitiriza kutsutsana kwakukulu. Svetlana akuyankhira. Ndipo kotero, mpaka wina asakakamize wina. Pa nthawi yomweyo, onse amavomereza kuti kukhutira ndi zotero, tiyeni tizinena kuti chikondi sichikudziwika bwino.
Svetlana amakhulupirira kuti ubwenzi wawo wapamtima watha kwambiri, chilakolako cha kugonana chachoka, koma akuwonetsa kuti asasunge zonyenga za chikondi chosatha ndi chamisala, koma kuti athane ndi choonadi. Izi zikutanthauza kuti kuzindikira kuti mwamuna ndi mkazi sangawotchedwe pamsampha wa chilakolako, chifukwa m'kupita kwa nthawi maganizo awo amasandulika kukhala chinthu china - chikondi, ulemu, ubwenzi, chikondi. Ndipo kugonana ... Chabwino, nthawizina, pamene izi zikufuna kwenikweni, pamene pali mphamvu, nthawi ndi maganizo, ndiye bwanji?
Aroma amadziona ngati wozunzidwa ndipo, mwachibadwidwe, alibe chifukwa. Akuti zaka zisanu zapitazo sakanatha kuganiza kuti mavuto onsewa ndi zosavomerezeka ndi kugonana "mwachangu" zingakhudze ubale wawo. Malingana ndi iye, ndiye Svetlana anali wosiyana kwambiri - kunyengerera, kukonda, kukonda ... Inde, amakhalabe mkazi wabwino, wosamalira alendo komanso wochezeka. Koma asanagone, mmalo mopondereza mwamuna wake, Sveta amasankha kuchita chilichonse kupatulapo chibwenzi. Awerenga bukhu kapena awone mndandanda ndipo ngati sakuzindikira kuti mwamuna wake akumva kuti ali wotayika komanso wosungulumwa. "Nchifukwa chiani iye sanakwatire ndi TV?" Majambo achi Roma.
Kulakwitsa kwakukulu kumapangidwa ndi anthu okwatirana omwe amawona kuwonongeka kwa chilakolako cha kugonana monga zovuta zawo, zosiyana ndi zapadera, zomwe ziribe zofanana "zochititsa manyazi" m'mbiri ya dziko. Mwina zingakhale zosavuta kwa iwo ngati atadziwa kuti vutoli ndilofala kwambiri, limene ambiri "okondedwa" amakonda kukhala chete. Koma mmalo mwa, ngati nthiwatiwa, bisa mutu wako mchenga, ndibwino kuyesa kuchita chinachake. Mwachitsanzo, kumvetsetsa zomwe zimayambitsa vutoli ndi kuyesanso kugonana.
ZOCHITA ZOKHUDZA ZOCHITIKA
Kusamvetsetsana kwakukulu mu gawo lapamtima kukanapewedwera ngati poyamba tinaphunzira kufufuza mozama za kugonana kwathu ndi kumvetsetsa ndi kulemekeza zosowa ndi zolakalaka za munthu wokondedwa.
Aliyense wa ife ali ndi mwayi wogonana. Zimayambitsidwa ndi majini, mkhalidwe wa thanzi, chikhalidwe, chikhalidwe cha chikhalidwe, chitukuko chakuthupi ndi zina zambiri. Kuti mudziwe zambiri za kugonana kwawo, kokwanira kukumbukira bwino kwambiri buku lanu lachikondi. Monga lamulo, panthawi ino timakhala ndi chilakolako chachikulu komanso timakonda kugonana. Komabe, ngati mutayesa kutengera chitsanzo ichi kumoyo wa tsiku ndi tsiku, mudzapeza nokha mumsampha womwewo monga Aroma ndi Svetlana. Panthawi ya chikondi chachiwawa, adasonyezana wina ndi mzake chigololo ndikudzikonzekeretsa kuti chiyanjano chomwecho chidzasungidwa m'moyo wonse pamodzi. Koma patapita nthawi, chilakolako cha kugonana cha Svetlana chinachepa pang'ono ndipo chinabwerera kuchizolowezi. Mwinamwake, ngati kugonana kwa mwamuna wake kunali kotayika poyambitsana, awiriwa sangakhale nawo osagwirizana. Koma mphamvu za Aroma zinali zazikulu kwambiri kwa osankhidwa ake. Komabe, msinkhu wosiyana wa chikhalidwe sichifukwa cha kusudzulana.
Akatswiri ogonana amanena kuti maanja omwe amakondana kwambiri pazochitika zonse zogonana, omwe akufuna kukonda chikondi, mofanana, nthawi imodzi komanso mofanana, ndi ochepa kwambiri. Kuphatikizanso apo, kukhalapo kwa mgwirizano wotero sikungakhale wosangalatsa. Chofunika kwambiri ndi kukhalapo kwa khalidwe lina lofunikira - luso, chikhumbo ndi luso loti "azilimbitsa" zokhudzana ndi kugonana kwawo.
KUCHITA PA ZIKHALIDWE
Pofuna kugwirizanitsa kugonana, aliyense payekha adzafunika khama. Zimachokera kwa aliyense, chifukwa ngati mnzanu wapafupi akudziyerekezera kuti ali ndi chilakolako chachikulu kapena akugwira ntchito mwakachetechete amadzipepesa ndikuyembekezera mwachidwi chilolezo chogonana - palibe chabwino chomwe chidzabwere.
• Yambani ndi kukambirana momasuka komanso momasuka. Musamatsutsane chifukwa cha zolakwa ndi zolakwa, kufotokoza zodandaula, kuika udindo wonse pa kugonana "pa chibwenzi" pa wina wa zibwenzi. Ndizomveka kulankhula pa mutu wakuti: "Tingachite bwanji kuti maubwenzi athu akhale achilengedwe komanso osangalatsa."
• Mungayesetse kuthetsa "mgwirizanowo". Fotokozerani kuti ndi nthawi iti yomwe mungatsindike pa chiyanjano komanso zomwe sizili zoyenera kuzipewa. Mwachitsanzo, chifukwa chabwino chokana chikhoza kukhala thanzi labwino, matenda a mwana, kupsinjika maganizo, kupanikizika, kutopa kwambiri. Koma ngati wina wa inu akuyenera kumverera chikondi ndi kuthandizidwa ndi wina - asanayambe kuchitapo kanthu, pamapeto pa mkangano, ndi zina zotero, kukondana kwakukulu ndi kofunika kulandila. Aloleni omwe samatentha ndi chilakolako chogonana panthawiyi, komabe alole kuti wokondedwayo adzichepetse ndikuyamba "kutenga nawo mbali pang'onopang'ono."
• Nanga bwanji ngati kuwonongeka kwa chilakolako cha kugonana kumawoneka kuti sungatheke? Nthawi zina anthu ogonana ndi amayi omwe ali m'mabanja amodzi amaletsa anthu okwatirana nthawi zina (kunena, kwa milungu itatu) kuti azigonana. Zimaloledwa kuti zisonyezerane zizindikiro zokhudzana, kugwirana wina ndi mzake, kupondereza, kumpsompsonana - ndizo zonse! Masiku angapo, monga lamulo, malingaliro a abwenzi omwe amadzitenga okha pachipatala amakhala ndi malingaliro. Kenaka amaloledwa kuyang'anitsitsa maliseche (kupewa chiwalo). Ndiko kumene mfundo yotchuka ya chipatso choletsedwa imagwira ntchito! Ndipo chilled, izo zinali, kwa okondana wina ndi mzake okondweretsa amaletsa kuletsa, kudabwa ndi zachilendo ndi kuwala kwa kumverera kwawo kumverera.
Izi ndi ziwiri zokha zomwe mungachite kuti mupume mtsinje watsopano mu moyo wapamtima ndikuupanga kukhala wokhutira komanso wokondwa. Mwinamwake, chikondi ndi chikhumbo choteteza maganizo ndi malingaliro okondedwa pamtima wanu zidzakupangitsani inu njira yanu, zomwe zidzakubweretsani mmanja mwa wina ndi mzake!