silingathetsedwe ndipo potsirizira pake limakula kukhala funso: "kupulumutsa banja losasangalala kapena kusudzulana bwino?".
Moyo wokhudzana ndi ntchito yovuta. Ndikofunikira kuyandikira ndi udindo wonse kuyankha mafunsowa. Inde, pachiyambi, ndikofunika kudziwa chomwe theka lachiwiri likuganizira za izi. Yesani kumvetsetsa zomwezo palimodzi. N'zotheka kuti mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu akukumana ndi vuto linalake, mwinamwake ali ndi matenda kapena ntchito. Choncho, pangakhale kukhala payekha, kusakwiya, kukhumudwa. Anthu ena safuna kufotokozera zomwe akukumana nazo, zomwe ena amaziona ngati zosakondweretsa. Samalani ndi theka lanu, ndiyeno, mwinamwake, vuto la kusunga banja losasangalatsa kapena kusudzulana lidzagwa lokha. Komabe, nthawiyi yakhala pamodzi si nthawi yoipitsitsa m'moyo wanu?
Kwa ena, ukwati wosasangalatsa ndi wamangati, "goli pamutu." Ndiye, ndithudi, ndi bwino kulingalira ngati mukufuna kupitirizabe ubale umenewu. Kugwirizana mwaufulu kwa anthu awiri aufulu kuli ndi mwayi waukulu kwambiri wa kukhalapo kwautali kuposa kukwatirana kosavuta kapena chofunikira. Koma izi sizingatheke ngakhale. Ngati mbali zonse zikhoza kupeza nthawi zabwino, kapena kupindula okha mu mgwirizanowu, ndiye kusudzulana, monga njira yothetsera vutolo, sikuwoneka kuti si njira yabwino yothetsera vutoli. Pamapeto pake, mutha kugwirizana. Pali anthu, kawirikawiri amuna omwe amafunika kukhala omasuka. Ayenera kukhala otsimikiza kuti akhoza kusiya nthawi iliyonse ngati akufuna. Ndipo ndi chidaliro chimenechi chomwe chimapangitsa iwo kukhala pafupi ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wawo. Zimakhala zovuta kukhala ndi anthu oterewa, koma n'zosangalatsa. Nthaŵi zonse pamakhala chiwerengero cha adrenaline, ndi chinyengo cha zachilendo. Ngati mumvetsetsa, iyi ndi njira yabwino yopulumutsira ukwatiwo.
Zikuonekeratu kuti m'kupita kwanthawi, kuwongolera kwa malingaliro ndi malingaliro kuchokera kwa oyandikana naye akuyandikira. Mavuto a m'banja amachititsa kuti munthu asamangokhalira kukonda chikondi, tsiku ndi tsiku amatha kusintha maganizo ake. Ndiyo nthawi imene abambo onse awiri akusowa mwatsopano. Pali chilakolako cholowetsa mukuthamanga kokondana komanso kukondana. Ndiwo mayesero a banja lanu. Kaya mutha kumvetsetsana, kodi mungakumane, kapena khoma nokha kuchokera ku khola lanu lokhala ndi chidwi ndi kuyamba kukhala moyo wanu. Kufikira, pamapeto pake, musasankhe kuti ndi bwino kuthetsa banja, kubwereranso m'nyanja ya zosangalatsa za moyo waufulu. Ndipo ndichifukwa chiyani ndikufunika kupeza nthawi ndikuyang'ana zatsopano? Yang'anani pafupi ndi inu kale muli ndi munthu amene mwaphunzira bwino. Inu mukudziwa zomwe mungathe kuyembekezera kuchokera kwa iye, mukudziwa makhalidwe ake, zofooka, zokonda. Yesani kusewera pa izo. Sinthani nokha, kusintha chilengedwe, kusintha chithunzi. Pang'onopang'ono, mnzanuyo adzakopeka mu masewera omwe mudayambe. Kudabwa, mudzapeza makhalidwe ake atsopano, osakayikira ngakhale pang'ono. Osati kokha kuti mukhale bwino komanso mutakhala bwino, mudzatha kupewa kusudzulana, kupatula zomwe mumakonda kwambiri nonse awiri. Izi ndi zothandiza kwambiri kusiyana ndi kuyambira pachiyambi.
Kusunga ukwati ndi bizinesi ya onse awiri. Tiyenera kuyang'ana mozama zomwe zilipo. Inde, pali milandu pamene banja losasangalala siliyenera kupulumutsa. Zonse zimadalira anthu okha. Musanasankhe kuchita, kasanu ndi kawiri kuti muyese. Nthawi zina mumangofunika kupuma kwa wina ndi mzake, kwa kanthawi, kuti muyese chirichonse. Sikofunika kuti izi zizikhala m'malo osiyanasiyana. Mukhoza kuyesa kutanthauzira ubalewo muwonekedwe wokondana. Lekani kukwiya wina ndi mzake, kupanga madandaulo. Sitizindikira kuti timamvetsera zonyamula katundu. Pang'ono pang'onopang'ono, phokosoli likhoza kukhala nyongolotsi, osadya mosamveka apulo lokongola la chikondi kuchokera mkati. Yesetsani kukhala okomerana wina ndi mzake, ndipo mwinamwake osati chirichonse chatayika, chinachake chinakupangitsani inu kamodzi kusankha kuchokera kwa munthu aliyense uyu.