Tiyeni tipereke zitsanzo za amayi omwe saganizira chilichonse chochititsa manyazi, ayambe kugwirizana ndi mlendo. Kodi akutsogolera chiyani?
1. Amaganiza kuti ukwati wa wokondedwa wake sukhalitsa nthawi yaitali. Iye amaganiza chinthu chonga ichi: kuti iye wakwatiwa kale ndizochitika mwangozi, ayenera kukhala wa ine. Kotero, ife tikufunikira mwamsanga kuti timuchotse iye ku banja "losayenera". Kodi sakudziwa kuti mkazi wake si mwamuna kapena mkazi wake? Amachitira mkazi wake molakwika. Amamuseka chifukwa chiyani amamufuna?
Anthu awiriwa, sangathe kukhala limodzi nthawi yaitali. Koma ndife nkhani ina. Tili kulumikizana wina ndi mzake, timamvetsetsana ndi theka, ndipo tikakumana, timaiwala za kukhalapo kwa nthawi. Tiyenera kumupangitsa kuti asiye mkazi wake, ndipo tidzakhala tikuyenda mmoyo.
2. Razluchnitsa akuganiza kuti mu chiyanjano pakati pa wokondedwa wake ndi mkazi wake mulibe malingaliro okwanira, achifundo, chikondi ndi chikondi. Ndiye ndikumverera kotani komwe mungakambirane? Ngati kunyumba kwake chilakolako chimangomva chitonzo kapena kumupanga kapolo: "Chotsani zinyalala!", "Kutupa", "Ndi nthawi yokonzanso, simukuganiza choncho?". Koma njira yopita kumtima wa munthu sikuti imangokhala m'mimba mwake, musamukakamize kuti achite chinachake, muyenera kumumasula ku mavuto a tsiku ndi tsiku.
Koma ndi ine adzakhala wosangalala, ndipo moyo sungasokoneze ubale wathu. Ndipo ngati tithera nthawi yaying'ono, ndibwino, ndikuimirira, ndimamvetsa zonse, ali ndi ntchito zambiri komanso amagwira ntchito. Ndidzangotonthozedwa ndi lingaliro lakuti ndi langa. Ndipo kawirikawiri misonkhano imakhala yolimba.
3. Mayiwake amamumvera chisoni ndi wokondedwa wake, chifukwa mkazi samamuyang'ana konse, alibebe thalauza ndi shati, mabowo mumasokisi kapena alibe mabatani. Iye sangamvetsetse momwe mkazi woyenera angagwire mwamuna wake ndi kusamvetsetsa koteroko pamene iye akuwona kuvulaza mafuta pa blouse yake.
Ndipo nchifukwa ninji munthu wokondweretsa wotero amadya masangweji awiri ndi soseji ndi tchizi, ndipo asanapite kuntchito, samadya kalikonse, kapena amamwa saladi wamba? Amadya mofulumira komanso zomwe ayenera kuchita - ndizosatheka komanso zovulaza thanzi. Kotero mungathe kubweretsa mwamuna wanu m'mimba ya zilonda, kapena munthu adzakhala ndi kuthamanga kwa magazi.
4. Mwina "wakuba" sakusamalira zomwe akulakalaka, komanso zomwe amadya. Ali ndi ntchito imodzi - kukonda, kumunyengerera, ndipo, mobwerezabwereza, ali ndi malingaliro olakwika, omwe "mkazi" sangathe kutuluka. Amachita izi ndi kunyezimira ndi chilakolako chotero kuti mwamuna amayamba kukondana nthawi yomweyo, akuiwala china chirichonse.
Iye sakudziwa chifukwa chake akusowa mlendo, iye ndi msaki basi, iye amakonda kutenga njira yake, ndiyeno asiye wokondedwa wake wakale. Iye sakufuna kuti akhale naye kwa moyo, ndikumukwatira. Koma mosiyana ndi amayi ena, iye sasamala za mbiri ndi zaka za mwamuna. Iye ali ngati chidole chophweka kwa iye, iwe ukhoza kusewera naye ndi kusiya.
Kotero ndi mwayi wanji wa mitundu yonse ya osocheretsa kutenga mwamuna kunja kwa banja? Zimadalira mwamuna yekhayo, ndipo amakhala wosangalala m'banja kapena momwe akumvera nthawi zonse.
Koma si zoona kuti munthu atachoka m'banja, mumapanga banja lamphamvu. Pambuyo pake, banja lachiwiri silili lamphamvu kuposa loyamba. Malinga ndi akatswiri a maganizo, munthu amapita kumanzere, ngati mkazi wake ndi mbuye wake samamukonda. Mwamuna amakomana ndi mkazi wina chifukwa amangofunika "kupambana chikho" ndikuonetsetsa kuti ali wokongola. Choncho, ndi mkazi yemwe ayenera kumuthandiza mwamuna wake, ndipo sakuyang'ana mtsikana kumbali.