"Kuyenda maulendo ogonana" - kumveka kosavuta, kosavuta komanso kokongola kwambiri. Chaka ndi chaka abambo ndi amai amatha kupuma, kukhala ndi chikondi chaufulu ndi alendo kapena kugula pomwepo. Kodi pali malire kwa zokopa alendo ovomerezeka padziko lapansi ndipo kodi njira yosangalatsa imatsogolera kuti? Pafupi ndi maiko akutali, nyanja zamphepete mwa nyanja, maso okongola - zokondweretsa zonse ndi zovuta za zokopa alendo kugonana lero.
Charlotte Rampling wazaka makumi asanu ndi zisanu ndi zisanu ndi zitatu, adadziwiratu kuti akukwiyitsa pamene Ellen adasewera mu filimu "Kumwera", atatulutsidwa mu 2006. Chakumapeto kwa zaka 70 aphunzitsi a zaka zapakati pa Chingerezi adapita ku Haiti kufunafuna zofuna za kugonana. Ellen amakumana ndi malo osungiramo malo ndi mnyamata wakuda wakuda ndipo amamupatsa kugonana. Mafilimu amatsutsana ndi mantha ambiri nthawi yomweyo ndipo amasonyeza kuti mbali ya moyo, yomwe nthawi zambiri amasankha kukhala chete. Pogwiritsa ntchito imodzi mwa zokambiranazi, adasankha kuti ayambe kuyendera filimu yochititsa manthayi "kuchokera kudziko losauka la Haiti komanso chifukwa chachisoni cha amayi omwe amapita kumapeto kwa dziko lapansi kuti amve okondedwa."
Njira zamoto
Chaka ndi chaka mu February-March, akazi zikwizikwi a ku Canada, a ku America ndi a Kumadzulo amatsegula nyengo yotentha kuzilumba za Caribbean za Jamaica ndi Barbados. Njira zina zogonana ndi kum'mwera kwa Ulaya (makamaka Greece, Italy, mayiko omwe kale anali Yugoslavia, Turkey ndi Spain) komanso ku Thailand ndi Africa - Kenya ndi Gambia.
Malingaliro a wofufuza wina wa ku America, Jeanette Bellevo, amene adafalitsa mu 2006 buku lonena za zokopa za akazi. "Chikondi kutali ndi nyumba", zaka zoposa 25 zapitazi, amayi okwana 600,000 ochokera m'mayiko otukuka adapeza mpumulo uwu.
Amayi makumi atatu, makumi anayi ndi makumi asanu, omwe ali odziimira paokha, amapanga mabuku ndi achinyamata omwe amawakonda, ovina, ogulitsa okhumudwa, "anyamata a m'nyanja" osagwira ntchito. Gwiritsani ntchito nthawi pabedi, m'mphepete mwa nyanja komanso pa phwando la tchuthi, ndipo pambuyo pa maholide amalipiritsa mphatso zamtengo wapatali (zovala zobvala, maulonda, etc.) akhala pamodzi, komanso kawirikawiri - ndi ndalama. Kum'mwera kwa Ulaya, okonda othamangitsira kawirikawiri safuna malipiro a chikondwererochi.
Mosiyana ndi maulendo achiwerewere achimuna amachitira uhule. Ku Thailand, chifukwa cha zosangalatsa za kugonana, amalonda pafupifupi theka la milioni amachoka chaka chilichonse, ambiri mwa iwo ndi amuna a zaka zapakati pa 35-55, apakatikati. Iwo amadziwa Russian osati mwakumva za mayiko akutali. Malingana ndi Rosstat, pa miyezi 9 yoyambirira ya chaka chatha, Thailand idakachezedwa ndi anthu oposa 84,000 a ku Russia. Chiwerengerochi ndichiwiri kuposa kawiri mu 2005. Malinga ndi akatswiri a makampani okaona malo, ambiri amapita kukachita zosangalatsa za kugonana.
Nyuzipepala yotchedwa Laurel, Natalia Kovaleva, yemwe ndi mkulu wa bungwe loyendayenda la Moscow, dzina lake Natalia Kovaleva, ananena kuti: "Ulendo umenewu ndi wotchuka kwambiri makamaka kwa achinyamata omwe ali ndi zaka 25 mpaka 38. - Amapita okha, ndi abwenzi kapena ngakhale mabanja, ndi mtsikana. Ndipotu, ulendo wa kugonana ndi mtengo, kapena pulogalamuyo kuyambira kawirikawiri sizimasiyana. Mwachidule, kutsogolera kwathu kumalo kumathandizira kutsogolera, kumapereka malingaliro pa funso lakuti "Kukapita Kuti?" Ku maadiresi a malo osangalatsa a kuderalo. Ngakhale, ziyenera kudziwika, oyendayenda athu ali "apamwamba" pambali iyi, iwo okha amadziwa bwino zonse. Amasankha Pattaya, zilumba zina ku Thailand, pambuyo pake, kuti azikhala ndi tchuthi lopuma. "
Malingaliro omwe analandira alendo athu pobwerera amabwereranso m'masewera ambiri oyendera alendo. Chifukwa chachikulu cha maulendo oterewa ndi mwayi wogwirizanitsa maulendo otsika mtengo ndi othandizira kugonana ndi ndondomeko yosangalatsa ya alendo.
"Ndichifukwa chiyani ndinapachika pa taek ndi asian? - Mmodzi wa alendo omwe akupita ku intaneti akufunsa kuti, " Ntchitoyi inandipatsa ine. Kuchokera pa kugonana ndi anzathu simukhala okhutira chotero. Aa osati kwenikweni ndine Brad Pitt. Moyo wa banja? Monga bwenzi langa adanena, "Kwa zaka 10 ife tonse takhala, mwa mawu oyenera a wolemba Victoria Tokareva," stools. " Mmodzi "stool" amabweretsa ndalama, podziwa kuti mukabwera kunyumba kuchokera kuntchito, mudzawona mbale ya borsch ndi yachiwiri "chovala" chovala chovala kapena malaya obvundukuka ... Atatha zaka makumi atatu kuti azichita masewera olimbitsa thupi amatha kusokonezeka. Kuwoneka-maluwa-mphatso-malo odyera-nambala ... Palibe china chatsopano. Kuphatikizanso, maubwenzi amalingaliro amakhala ndi chizoloŵezi chogwidwa ndi kuvulala pa nthawi yopasuka. Njira yosavuta komanso yowonjezera ndiyo "Ndikupatsani ndalama, mumandifuna-mipando," popeza pamapeto pake munthuyo ndizofunikira ... Ndipo ngati pali mwayi wofanana, inde, kuphatikizapo ndalama zofanana, kuphatikizapo kuyenda, onani mtendere, ndiye "chifukwa chiyani kulipira zambiri?"
Bedi popanda ntchito
Nzika za ku Russia zaka zingapo zapitazo zinagwirizana ndi kayendetsedwe kake ka alendo ogonana, panthawi imodzimodziyo ikufutukula malo ake. Iwo ali opindulitsa kwambiri poti apite - zokopa alendo zimakhala ndi malo pafupifupi kulikonse. M'nyumba zapakhomo, anthu ambiri akufunira ku Turkey, Egypt ndi ku Caribbean. Mndandandawu muli Spain, Greece, Croatia, chilumba cha India cha Goa ndi Phuket ku Thailand.
Pa nthawi yomweyo, mosiyana ndi alendo oyenda kumadzulo, maulendo achikondi nthawi zambiri amawononga a ku Russia kwaulere. Nthaŵi zambiri, amapanga malo ochezera a spa romance. Kulumikizana kwachidule kwa akulu akulu awiri panthawi yonse. Popanda udindo uliwonse komanso "mwaulere." Koma zolinga ziri chimodzimodzi, kusungulumwa kwadziko lonse, kusowa kwa chidwi ndi chiyanjano, ngakhale chiwonetsero.
"Mwamuna wanga ali wamkulu kuposa zaka khumi kuposa ine, ubwenzi wathu wapamtima ndi ife umachepetsedwa, " anatero Irina, wazaka 39. - Kunyumba nthawi zonse ndimamva kuti "ndikukumana ndi mavuto": Sindimachita motero, ndikuwoneka zoipa ndi zina zotero. Kamodzi pa chaka, mu September, ndimaponyera chirichonse ndikupita ndi mzanga ku Sharm El Sheikh. Tikukhala mu hotelo ya nyenyezi zinayi, patsiku lomwe timasambira dzuwa ndi kusambira, usiku timamasuka. Aigupto achinyamata awa ndi openga ndi malingaliro awo, akuyang'ana, akuchenjezani chokhumba chanu chirichonse. Pa nthawi ya tchuthi, ndimakhutitsidwa ndi chiyanjano chotero ndikutsitsimutsa - ndimamva ngati wokongola ndi mfumukazi. Pafupi ndi mphatso iliyonse kapena kuyankhula kwa ndalama si. Chinthu chovuta kwambiri ndi kupita kunyumba: masabata angapo oyambirira matenda akuvutika. "
Cholinga china cha zokopa alendo za kugonana ndi ludzu la ufulu wa kugonana. Kuli kutali ndi nyumba, mungathe kuiwala kwa kanthawi za "mfundo za makhalidwe abwino" ndi zovuta popanda mantha kuti mudzaonedwa kuti ndinu wosayera komanso wotsutsidwa.
Olesya, Muscovite wazaka makumi awiri ndi zinayi, amene adayendera Ibiza m'chaka cha chilimwe, akuti mlengalenga wa chilumbachi ndiwopereka chikondi kwaulere: "Ibiza ndi chilumba chokhwimitsa nthawi zonse ndipo palibe amene amaganiza za mavuto. Tonsefe tinangosangalala ndi nyimbo, nyanja komanso wina ndi mzake. Ambiri oyendera alendo, ndithudi, achinyamata - Amereka, Australia, Azungu (nthawi zambiri Apolisi ndi Mabulgaria). Anthu ambiri olemera. Paphompho la anyamata "abuluu". Zochititsa chidwi ndi ma discos ndi mabungwe. Monga pamabwalo, mankhwala amaperekedwa pafupi ndi khomo la magulu - nthawi zonse pandemonium. Zimangovuta kuti mutaya mutu wanu - chikondwerero chokhazikika komanso chikondi. "
Mwa mtundu wa "chakudya chofulumira"
Chimene chidzasandutsa chikondi cha tchuthi mu moyo wanu, chimadalira nokha nokha, psychologists ndi otsimikiza. Mwinamwake, ubale wabwino ndi waufupi umathandizira kukhulupilira ndi kukonda kwawo, kuchiritsidwa ndi kupsinjika maganizo komwe kumabwera chifukwa cha chikondi m'mbuyomo, ndikupatsanso mphamvu kuti apite patsogolo. Mwina, adzalimbikitsa chikondi chanu ndipo adzakutulutsani ku maofesi osiyanasiyana, zomwe zingakuthandizeni kudziwa zina mwachinsinsi zogonana. Chinthu chachikulu ndicho kusunga malingaliro a zenizeni komanso osati "kukhala pansi" pamakondomeko a tchuthi, monga mtundu wamwano. Popanda kutero, mumakhala chiopsezo chogonana komanso chosasangalatsa.
"Kugonana kwa anthu oterowo sikumangoganizira za chikondi ndi maubwenzi, koma mphindi zosangalatsa (kufanana kwa minofu)," akuchenjeza Yevhen Kulgavchuk, katswiri wodziŵa za kugonana, katswiri wa maganizo, wothandizira pulezidenti wa Russian Association of Sexologists. - Patapita nthaŵi, kumayambira kugonana kumayambiriro. Amapeza izi, mu ubale weniweni, kugonana kumakhala kosasangalatsa. Anthu sazolowereka kukonda. Zothandiza kapena, "zokopa" izi zimayambitsa thanzi labwino, n'kosatheka kunena mosaganizira. Matenda opatsirana pogonana (kondomu silipereka chiwindi cha 100 peresenti). Zochita - njira yowonjezera kudzidalira, kugwedeza mtima, kumva mphamvu za kugonana. "
Pamapeto pake, zomwe muyenera kuyang'ana kumapeto kwa dziko - zosadziwika, koma chikondi chenicheni kapena kugonana mu "chakudya cholimbitsa" mawonekedwe, aliyense amasankha yekha.
Owerenga Baibulo pogonana
Kutchuka kwa zokopa alendo kumalimbikitsidwa ndi mabuku ndi mafilimu pankhaniyi.
✓ M'buku lake logulitsidwa kwambiri "Momwe Stella adayambiranso kumwetulira" mu 1998, Terry McMillan adawuza nkhani ya moyo wake: Wophunzira wamasiye yekhayo amapita ku Jamaica ndikupeza chimwemwe chachikazi m'manja mwa mwana wamng'ono. Mu moyo weniweni, Macmillan anakwatira chifaniziro cha msilikali wake. Iwo anasudzulana pamene mwamuna adavomereza poyera kuti iye anali amasiye.
✓ Masewera a Chingerezi Willie Russell "Shirley Wokondedwa" wokhudzana ndi chikondi cha ku Greece cha mayi wokalambayo Shirley anasangalala kwambiri kuti dzina lake lotchedwa Shirley valentine linakonzedweratu kuti azitha kugonana kuchokera ku Great Britain.
✓ Ntchito yowononga kwambiri zokhudzana ndi kugonana ndi "Platform" ya mlembi wa ku France Michel Huelbek. Pali chilichonse: Mayiko akutali, nyanja zamphepete mwa nyanja, maso okongola ... Kwa okalamba ndi akuluakulu apadera, zokopa za kugonana zimakhala lingaliro lokonzekera: iye akulota kuti akondwere ndi kuthandizira kwake anthu onse.
CHITSANZO CHA OPENDA:
Svetlana PROKOPYUK, katswiri wa zamaganizo, Gestalt wothandizira, wogwira ntchito pa malo okhudza maganizo "Apa ndi Tsopano"
Anthu m'nthaŵi yathu yodziika payekha, pamene psychology ya munthu, mmbulu-munthu, wopindula ndi chitukuko, akulamulira, akutsutsana kwambiri ndi wina ndi mzake ndipo nthawi imodzimodziyo akufuna kufunana. Timakonda kuyang'anitsana kuchokera kumbali, osayandikira. Munthu aliyense payekha. Zimakhala zovuta kukhulupirira, kukhala mabwenzi, kukonda komanso kukhala ndi mabanja olimba. Pa nthawi yomweyo, kufunika kwa
mu ubale wachikondi, wodalirika. Chotsatira chake, kusowa kwakukulu kwa kuyankhulana, kuphatikizapo pa thupi. Pambuyo pake, kugonana kwa thupi - kumapweteketsa mtima, kugwirana wina ndi mzake - pakuti munthu kuyambira ubwana ndi wofunika kwambiri. Ngati palibe, izi ndi zopweteka. Ndipo kuyendayenda kwa kugonana mu nkhani iyi ndi imodzi mwa njira zophweka za kusintha.
Ngati chibwenzi chimasintha kapena palibe pakali pano, chikondi cha tchuthi chingakhale njira imodzi yodziwidwira ndi anyamata, kuganizira mu chikondi, kudzitsitsimutsa maganizo anu. Ubale woterewu sukutanthauza udindo, monga m'banja. Ndipo panthawi yomweyi kumathandiza kudzimva kuti ndi koyenera, kukongola, kumangirira chikondi, chomwe chimasoweka pa moyo wa tsiku ndi tsiku.