Mafunso awa ndi omwe amapezeka kwambiri ku Yandex ndi Google. Amapemphedwa nthawi zonse ndi akatswiri ndi abwenzi. Iwo amaganiziridwa za nthawi yaitali osagona. Lero timayankhula ndi mitu yayikulu ya amayi ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo, wolemba, wolemba maphunziro a akazi, wophunzira wodzikonda, Wachiwiri wa bungwe la International Association for Development Person, komanso mkazi wabwino ndi amayi - Gloria Moore.
FUNSO: Kodi theka langa liri kuti?
- Kodi ndi zoona kuti munthu aliyense padziko lapansi ali ndi theka lake? Gloria Moore : Ndizoona. "Hafu" yokha si imodzi. Tiyeni tiyitane iwo awiri abwino. Tangoganizani khola lokhala ndi zitseko zambiri. Ili ndilo makonzedwe a tsogolo lanu. Kumbuyo kwa zitseko ndi makonzedwe atsopano ndi zitseko zatsopano. Palibe mafuta. Tili ndi ufulu wosankha. Mwachitsanzo, sukulu munalowa "khomo" lomwe limatchedwa "Moscow" - anasamukira ku chigawochi, ndipo moyo wanu unadutsa pa "khola" lina. Mwa njira iyi mudzakumana ndi banja lina lotchedwa Sergei. Koma iwe ukhoza kukhala ku Saratov. Ndiyeno moyo wanu ukanakhala wosiyana. Ndipo awiri anu adzakhala Timoteo. Ndipo tili ndi machitidwe ambirimbiri. Zonsezo "zimayikidwa" pasadakhale, koma, komabe tili omasankha kusankha komwe tingapite, ndi ntchito yothetsera.
- Kodi zingatheke kuti mayi asankhe khola limene liribe theka? Gloria Moore: Inde. Koma izi ndizosatheka. Nthawi zambiri awiriwa amakumanabe. Komabe, iwo sangathe kuzindikira wina ndi mnzake, kapena sakudziwa momwe angamangire ubale, ndipo chifukwa chake - kusungulumwa.
- Kodi muyenera kuchita chiyani kuti muzindikire hafu? Kodi iye ali ndi zizindikiro zirizonse? Gloria Moore: Inde. Ndili ndi maphunziro angapo pa izi. Ndizosatheka kuyankha funsoli mwachidule, koma mukhoza kuphunzira kuzindikira munthu wanu ngakhale pang'onopang'ono. Kuyamba, mwachitsanzo, n'zotheka kuchokera ku njira yanga yaulere "Mmene mungapezere mwamuna woyenera", momwe ine ndikufotokozera mwachidule ndikudziwika bwino kuti ndi amuna otani. Podziwa za mitundu iyi, mukhoza kudziwa pasadakhale zomwe mumayang'ana kuchokera kwa munthu, ndi chiyani osati, ndikupanga kusankha kokwanira.
FUNSO: Chifukwa chiyani sindinakwatiwe?
"Bwanji sindingakwatirane?" Mkazi amakomana naye bwino, ndipo ali kale wokwatira. Kapena ali mfulu, koma safulumira kukwatira. Kapena, kawirikawiri, sangathe kukomana ndi munthu wamba, "cholakwika" chimapezeka ... Gloria Moore: Musakhulupirire nkhani zachabechabe ponena kuti palibe amuna enieni omwe atsala. Iwo ali. Amayi ena amatha kukwatira kangapo, komanso kwa oyenerera. Ndipo ena - ayi. Chifukwa chiyani? Iwo ndi aluntha, ndi okongola, ndipo okwatira - chabwino, sagwira ntchito! Ngati muika pambali "Dona wangwiro," omwe anthu amapewa, pali chifukwa chimodzi chokha. Atsikana samangofuna
ukwati . Inde, pozindikira, akufuna banja ndi ana. Koma munthu ali ndi malingaliro osadziŵa. Imatsogolera khalidwe lathu. Ndipo ngati simukufuna kukwatira mosamvetsetsa, mudzakumana ndi njira yosavomerezeka yokwatirana ndi mwamuna. Makamaka, iwo ali okwatira. Kwa iwo omwe "amawapeza", tiyenera kudzifunsa moona mtima-kodi ndikuwopa chiyani mumtima mwanga? Chifukwa chiyani sindifuna kukwatiwa? Lekani kuganiza "korona za chilekerero", anthu oyipa, chiwonongeko, chikhalidwe, zaka, etc. Lumikizani katswiri yemwe angakuthandizeni kuzindikira ndi kuthetseratu zifukwa zanu zenizeni za chiyero m'chikondi. Pa akaunti yanga, mwachitsanzo, maukwati asanu ndi limodzi okondwa. Onse asanu ndi limodzi - omwe ali kale osimidwa. Akazi okalamba omwe asiya kukhulupirira mphamvu zawo. Ndikunena kuti zisanu ndi chimodzi, ngakhale pali zambiri, koma awiriwa awiri ayesedwa kale, onse amakhala ndi moyo zaka zisanu ndi zisanu ndi ziwiri pamodzi, ndipo ndikutha kuziwona. Amayi onsewa anabwera kwa ine ndi funso ili: "Chifukwa chiyani sindingathe kulenga banja?" Ndipo tinathetsa zifukwazo ndikuzichotsa. Atangokwatirana, anasangalala kwambiri.
- Ndiyenera kuchita chiyani kuti ndikwatire? Gloria Moore: Kuti mukwatirane, muyenera: choyamba: kuchotsa mantha omwe amakulepheretsani kuyambitsa banja. Kaŵirikaŵiri izi ndizochitikira kale - anu, kapena kholo. Chachiwiri: kusankha munthu woyenera, kotero kuti analidi munthu weniweni, osati "osadziwika" a mabuku kapena mafilimu osadziwika. Chachitatu: mwakhama kumanga maubwenzi kuti mubweretse ku ukwatiwo. Ngati mukuganiza kuti iyi ndiyo yomaliza kukwatirana, ndikukhumudwitsani. Ichi ndi chiyambi chabe. Banja ndi ntchito. Musagwire ntchito pa ubale - iwo amagwa. Palibe chikondi chidzapulumutsa. Ndipotu, sivuta. Mukungofunikira kuphunzira malamulo angapo ndikugwiritsa ntchito. Ndiye ukwatiwo udzakhala wolimba. Tsoka, sukulu izi sizinaphunzitsidwe.
FUNSO LACHITATU: Chifukwa chiyani mwamuna wanga amasintha ine?
Gloria Moore: Kawirikawiri m'mabuku awo amalemba - ndi amene amamuimba mlandu, amasintha. Sindinathe, sindingathe, sindinali "mkazi" wotere, ndi zina zotero. Ndipotu, chirichonse chiri chovuta kwambiri. Pali chiwonongeko, chomwe chimachitika chifukwa cha ubale m'banja. Pamene munthu ayamba kuyang'ana "malo" kumbali. Ngati mwamuna wamodzi yekhayo, posachedwa adzasiya banja, sangathe kuphwanya. Banja lotero lingathe kupulumutsidwa pachigawo choyamba. Koma kokha ngati onse awiri akufuna izi, ndipo onse awiri akufunitsitsa kugwira ntchito mwakhama. Pali mtundu wa amuna amene angasinthe pa zochitika zilizonse. Khalani inu nthawi zosachepera zana mkazi wangwiro. Zangokhala zokonzeka. Kwa iye, chiwembu - ichi ndi chitsimikizo cha udindo wa alpha, munthu wopambana, ngati mukufuna. Kwa iye, wokondedwa ndi mphoto ya chikhalidwe. Pa nthawi yomweyo amakonda mkazi wake ndi ana ake, ndipo amapereka banja, ndipo sakufuna kupita kulikonse. Kodi muyenera kuchita chiyani? Njira yabwino yothetsera vutoli ndi kuvomereza mfundo iyi. Muli ndi mitala. Tsatirani malangizo a agogo aakazi - musamvere. Simungathe-kusudzulana. Chifukwa sizingatheke. Ndipo koposa zonse - musakwatira kapena kukwatiwa ngati muli ndi nsanje.
- Ndipo momwe mungadziwire kuti mukukwatirana ndi wogulitsa? Pa izo sizinalembedwe? Gloria Moore: Zangolembedwa. Chowonadi ndi chakuti kudziwa chikhalidwe cha maonekedwe ndi khalidwe la amuna, mukhoza kwenikweni kuchokera pa miniti yoyamba, ngakhale pakuwoneka kuti ndani yemwe ali. Iyi si nthano. Ndakhala ndikugwiritsa ntchito izi kwa zaka zambiri ndikuphunzitsa mazana a akazi izi chips. Mukayamba kukomana ndi munthu, mumatha kumvetsa momwe angakhalire mwamuna. Ndipo molingana ndi izi, mukhoza kuzindikira - mukufunikira mwamuna wotere kapena ayi.
- Kotero mungathe kusankha mwamuna woyenera pasadakhale? Kuoneka mwachidule? Gloria Moore: Palibe chinthu chokwanira. Mtundu uliwonse uli ndi ubwino wake. Mwachitsanzo, "osintha", monga lamulo, amalandira bwino. Ndipo mtundu woyenerera kwambiri - mu zolemba zanga umatchedwa Intuit - ndizobisika, zowona zenizeni, koma ndizopindulitsa kwambiri. Choncho ndikofunika kusankha.
- Ndipo n'zosatheka kuti "kwa anzeru ndi okongola?" Gloria Moore: Mungathe kukhala ndi amuna awiri. Ndipo ndi bwino kuposa anayi. Ndiye ndendende makhalidwe onse adzakhalapo. Koma mozama, monga lamulo, halves amasankhidwa molingana ndi mfundo ya kukopa kwa kutsutsana. Choncho chinthu chofunika kwambiri apa ndikumanga bwino maubwenzi, ndipo kumvetsetsa kuti sikutheka kupempha mbalame kuti ipeze makoswe, komanso kuchokera ku moles - kuti iwuluke. Mu mtundu uliwonse - zilakolako zawo ndi zofooka zawo.
FUNSO LACHIWIRI: Chifukwa chiyani amayi anga samandimvetsa?
Gloria Moore: Amayi ndi chimodzi mwa zopunthwitsa mmoyo wa amayi ambiri. Amayi - ichi ndi maziko oti mudziwonetse nokha ngati mkazi, monga mayi, monga mkazi. Ndiye taganizirani zomwe zimachitika pamene mayi ndi mayi alibe ubale wabwino kwambiri.
- Ndipo chikuchitika chiani? Gloria Moore: Sindingathe kumanga banja, monga lamulo. Ndinayankhula pamwamba pa mantha ochokera m'banja la makolo. Ngati banja la makolo silinasangalale, mtsikanayo akuvuta kukhulupirira kuti banja liri losangalala. Amakhulupirira kuti mwamuna ndi mkazi ayenera kulumbira, kunyenga wina ndi mzake, ndi zina zotero. Chotsatira chake, panjira yomwe akupeza oyenerera oyenerera chifukwa cha zikhulupiliro zake - onyenga, opereka, zidakwa ... Pamene akukhala mayi, akuyamba mavuto atsopano. Sapeza chilankhulo chofanana ndi mwanayo, pamene akukula, zovuta za mwana wake zimayambira pa amayi ake, ndipo mavuto atsopano amayamba mu chiyanjano.
- Ndingachite chiyani za izi? Gloria Moore: Ndili ndi ntchito yambiri ndi amayi anga. Kapena, osati ndi amayi anga, koma ndi chithunzi chake m'mutu mwanga. Amayi mwina sangadziwe za maphunziro anu konse, ndipo ubale wanu ndi iye udzasinthidwa kuti ukhale wabwino. Ndipo moyo wanu uyamba kusintha kuti ukhale wabwino. Ngakhale amayi sakali moyo, mungathe komanso kuchotsa maganizo oipa. Chifukwa potsiriza timagwirizana ndi maganizo athu ndi zikhulupiliro zathu. Ndili ndi njira zambiri zolemba zomwe zandithandiza kuti ndizigwirizana ndi amayi anga, ndikuthandizanso amayi ambirimbiri. Mwa njira, mavuto a amayi akathetsedwa, mavuto a m'banja, ndi kudzidalira, komanso ana akutha. Zimamveka zosangalatsa, koma ndinadutsa ndekha, ndi mantha, ndi mapulogalamu, ndi mavuto ndi amayi anga. Ndinakwanitsa kumanga banja losangalala pambuyo pa zaka zambiri zomwe sizinapindule. Kotero iwe ukhoza kutero. Ndikofunika kokha kufuna.
FUNSO LACHIWIRI: Kodi mungatani kuti mukhale wosangalala?
Gloria Moore: Limenelo ndi funso lodabwitsa. Ndikufuna akazi atha kufunsa funso ili tsiku lililonse. Izi zimangoperekedwa kuti ndizolakwika. Funso loyenera ndilo: "Chimwe chimandipangitsa kukhala wokondwa?". Dzifunseni nokha za tsiku lirilonse! Pezani chinachake chomwe chimakupatsani chimwemwe - tsiku lirilonse, ndipo osati kwinakwake kopanda phokoso lomwe silikudziwika, lidzabwera kapena ayi. Ndipo chitani, chitani chomwe chimakupangitsani kukhala osangalala! Izi zikhoza kukhala zinthu zosavuta - kuyenda mu paki, kukambirana ndi ana kapena zinyama, kusangalalira mwakachetechete, kuchita zozizwitsa zokondweretsa, zokondweretsa ... kawirikawiri, njira ya chisangalalo ndi yosiyana kwa aliyense. Koma ndi! Mukungofunafuna chimwemwe chanu palibe. Sizomwe zili pa adiresi: "Ndipamene ndikupeza ... (onetsetsani nokha) - Ndidzakhala wokondwa!" Inde simudzatero! Ngati simukudziwa kusangalala ndi moyo tsopano, musaphunzire apo. Ngati muli ndi abambo abwino, mabanki anu ndi opaleshoni yanu ya pulasitiki. Zonsezi zidzakutengerani posachedwa, ndipo mudzayang'ananso chimwemwe, zovomerezeka ndi kukhalapo m'moyo wanu wa anthu ena kapena zinthu. Iyi ndi msewu womalizira. Chimwemwe ndi lero. Apa ndi tsopano. Panthawi yomweyi. Kuti muchite izi, musakwatirane, kupambana miliyoni, kapena kugula thumba latsopano. Kumvetsetsa, chimwemwe chanu chimakhala mkati mkati. Tiyenera kumasula. Pali nthawizonse chinachake chothokoza dziko lino, mmalo modandaula za kusowa kwa chinachake. Ndipo kumbukirani - malingaliro anu ndi mapemphero anu. Ndicho chimene mumaganiza kwambiri tsikulo - chikuwonjezeka pa moyo wanu. Choncho ganizirani zomwe mumakonda. Ndipo izo zidzabwera. Anayesedwa payekha. Khalani okondwa!
Mafunso anafunsidwa Tatyana Ogudalova.