"Ngati mwamuna samenyera chikondi, ndiye sakonda," psychology

Tonsefe timagwiritsidwa ntchito kuti munthu ndi mwamuna, wolombo yemwe ali wokonzeka kuchita chirichonse kuti atenge nyama yofunidwa - kuthamangira kunkhondo ndi wotsutsa, mwachitsanzo. Amayi ndi agogo aakazi adaphunzitsa ndikutiphunzitsa kuti chinthu chachikulu m'banja ndichoyenera kukhala mwamuna, kuti banja lolimba silingamangidwe ndi zokopa komanso kuti msungwana sayenera "kuthamanga" pa mnyamata, ngakhale atakondana naye. Koma mnyamata amayenera kupeza mtsikana, kumusamalira ndi kuchita chirichonse kuti atsimikizire kuti wosankhidwa wake amadziona kuti ndi wapadera ndipo ndi wapadera kwa iye. Kuwonjezera pamenepo, wosankhidwayo akhoza, malinga ndi ziphunzitso za mibadwo yakale, amamenya phazi lake pamene akufuna, ndipo mwamuna yemwe angathe kukhala nawo nthawi yomweyo ayenera kukwaniritsa nthawi iliyonse ya wokondedwa wake. Ngati, pa chifukwa chilichonse, iye amakana kuchita izi, ayenera kuti nthawi yomweyo azionedwa kuti ndi wosakhulupirika, wopandukira komanso wosayenera chikondi cha mayiyo. Chabwino, ngati mwadzidzidzi, "wolemekezeka" yemwe amadzipangira yekha, ndiye kuti mwamuna weniweni ayenera kumvetsa zonse, kukhululukira ndi kuyamba kubwereranso. Izo zikuwoneka ngati bukhu la deseni la gentle la m'zaka za zana la 19, chabwino? Tsoka ilo, amayi athu ndi agogo aakazi amawoneka ngati achikale m'zaka zathu zomwe zikukula mofulumira pankhani za chikondi. Ndipo ngakhale atsikana a m'zaka zapitazi mu nkhani zachikondi anali osavuta, malangizo awo a khalidwe sali abwino kwa ife. Ndipo kotero, ngati inu munayang'anizana ndi funso "ngati munthu samenyana ndi chikondi, ndiye sakonda" , psychology ya amuna iyenera kukondweretsani inu poyamba. Tiyeni tiyesere kumvetsetsa pamodzi kuti chiweruzo ichi ndi chotani m'zaka zathu zamakono, zamapamwamba komanso zosadziŵika bwino.

Kotero, iwe ndi msungwana wamakono, wodalira mwa iwe wekha, koma ndi ndemanga - " ngati mwamuna samenyera chikondi, ndiye sakonda," psychology yanu imadzichepetsa ndipo imadziwa kutsimikizira kwa mawu awa. Nanga bwanji? Ndipo inu nokha mungathe kufotokoza tanthauzo la "kulimbana ndi chikondi"? Mwinamwake mukusakaniza pakati pa mafani awiri, ndipo simungamvetsetse chifukwa chake saitanani kuti apite kuwiri, sakukupatsani misonkhano itatu, kuti muthe kusankha ndi kupereka yankho lomalizira, musadziwe makolo anu kuti mupeze malo awo? Kapena apa pali chitsanzo chochepa kwambiri: Mudakangana ndi wokondedwa wanu, ndipo adabwerera panjira, ndikuganiza kuti ndi bwino kukusiya payekha kusiyana ndi kuchita nokha ndi kudzipangira nokha mavuto. Ndipo inu, mutatha kuyankhula, mwachitsanzo, ndi amayi anu, mwafika pozindikira kuti ngati mwamuna samenyera chikondi, ndiye kuti sakonda , psychology ya maubwenzi ndi chinthu chovuta, koma mosakayikira amatsogoleretsa inu nthawi zina kuganiza zabodza. Pangani chimwemwe chanu chikhale poyamba, koma ndi mnzanu wina, kutchula mawu osayenerera osanenedwa ndi kudandaula nawo kwa aliyense amene angathe. Koma kodi mukuchita zabwino? Pambuyo kutsatira ndondomekoyi ndi ndondomeko yotereyi, mukhoza kukhala ndi mphuno yanu, chifukwa anthu atopa, zovuta, zothandiza. Ndiye ganizirani za zochita zanu. Kumbukirani amayi apamwamba ndi ubale wawo kwa amuna. Mwachitsanzo, mawu a mtsikana wina wokonda mafilimu, Grace Kelly, anati: "Munthu wachilengedwe ndi waulesi. Ngati akazi onse anali ndi ntchito, abambo ankakhala pakhomo kumwa mowa ndi kuyang'ana pa TV, "kapena mawu omwe anawamasulira ndi wojambula, wolemba masewero ndi wolemba munthu mmodzi, Bette Davis:" Amayi amphamvu akukwatiwa ndi amuna ofooka okha. " Ndipo awa ndi akazi a zaka za m'ma 1900! Kotero ngati inu mukuganiza kuti payenera kukhala chinachake choti chichitike ndi munthu yekha, ndiye inu mukulakwitsa. Ubale umamangidwa ndi anthu awiri, ndipo n'kosatheka kulola munthu amene ali mu ndondomekoyi, monga kukhala pansi ndi manja. Ngati mukufunadi mwamuna, ngati mumamukonda, ndiye kuti mutachita zonse kuti mumuthandize. Chabwino, ngati mwakonzeka kukhala maola ndi phukusi la chips pa TV ndikudikirira HE kuti ayitane, koma musaitane poyamba chifukwa muli ndi "kunyada," ndiye ndikukhumba inu kuleza mtima ndikugulitsa chips kwa zaka zambiri ... patsogolo.

Mukudziwa, pamene ndikulemba nkhani zoterezi, ndimaganizira mozama kuti ife, akazi a zaka za m'ma 2100, timadandaula za zomwe tamenyera mu 19-zomwe tinamenyana nazo, ndipo tinathamangirako. Tinkafuna kukhala odziimira paokha ndi amuna - timadwala chifukwa chakuti sitinasamalire, tikufuna kupewa kuzunzidwa - tsopano tivala zovala zabwino kwambiri, kotero kuti amuna okha amafuna ife, amafuna ntchito - tsopano tikudandaula kuti "tikulima ngati akavalo" ndi zina zotero patsogolo. Zaka mazana awiri mbiriyakale - pshik, ndipo zambiri zasintha. Zochitika za munthu zimakhala zosiyana. Tiyeni tiganizire zomwe munthu akumva, yemwe, monga mukuganiza, samenyera chikondi?

Amuna onse moyo wina ayenera chinachake. Chifukwa chakuti iwo ndi amuna. Bzalani mtengo-ayenera, alere mwana-ayenera, amange nyumba-ayenera, apereke banja-ayenera, amuthandize mayi-ayenera, amenyere chikondi-ayenera, ndi zina zotero. Izi ndi za ife, atsikana, zochuluka zomwe zakhululukidwa ndikuloledwa. Titha kumenyera munthu, ndipo sitidzalandira chilichonse. Koma ngati mwamuna agwidwa ndi mkazi, izi sizikuwonjezera ku ulemu wake.

Koma tinkamenyera nkhondo kulingana kwa amuna ndi akazi, zomwe zikutanthauza kuti zinatheka kuti amuna akhale ofooka pang'ono, osasamala pang'ono, osasamala pang'ono. Mkaziyo sangachite chonyoza ngati woyamba atenga tsiku, woyamba adzayambiranso kuyanjanitsa, woyamba adzalandira kukwatiwa, woyamba akupsompsona. Inde, kunyada kwathu ndichabechabe, tikawona momwe mwamuna amatisamalira, momwe amasonyezera malingaliro ake. Koma kunena kuti "samenyera chikondi" chifukwa chakuti pa zina sizinapange momwe ife tikufunira, sikuli koyenera. Timakonda kukokomeza zonse. Ganizirani, chifukwa chimene amakuchitirani, nayenso, ndikumenyana naye. Ngati simukukonda zimenezo nthawi zina sanasonyezepo kanthu, sanachite chinachake, ndiye kambiranani naye. Ndithudi mwamuna wanu ali ndi zifukwa zomveka. Mwachiwonetsero chomwecho, anthu onse ndi osiyana, ndipo ngati vuto limene mnyamata wanu sakuchita silinabwerezedwe kwa nthawi yoyamba, ndiye mwinamwake nkhaniyo ili mu chikhalidwe chake, osati mwa iyeyekha, ndiyeno mudzipange nokha ngati wokhutira zochitika izi, kapena ayi. Amuna amakonda chitonthozo, ndipo ngati mumayamikira okondedwa anu, nthawi zina amapita kwa iwo kuti akuthandizeni. Bwino!