Icho chikuwoneka mwa momwe iye amamuwonekera iye, ngakhale kuyesera kumabisa maso ake ndi kumawoneka osayanjanitsika. Izi zikhoza kuwonedwa kuchokera ku manja ake, pamene amangochita mwangozi kapena akuwoneka ngati akuseka, akugwira dzanja. Izi zikuwonekera kuchokera ku malingaliro ake osokonezeka a kutayika, pamene mkazi amachoka m'manja mwake. Ndipotu, ngati mwamuna akufuna kuti akhale pafupi ndi mkazi, nthawi zonse amafuna kuti azigwirizana naye. Psychology ndi kukopa mwakuthupi kumatipangitsa ife kuyesera kuti tiyandikire kwa iwo amene amatichitira mochuluka kwambiri kwa ife. Mwamuna amatha kusiya maganizo ake, kunena kuti mkazi amamukhumudwitsa, koma, zizindikiro zosalankhula zimayankhula mosiyana. Mwachitsanzo, mwamuna akonda mkazi, amayesa kutenga malo kutali ndi iye. Koma kuti ena samvetsetsa mmene akumvera, amatenga malo osati pafupi, koma m'malo mwake, kuti akuwonekera. Mwamuna akufuna kuyang'ana wokondedwa wake. Izi sizosadabwitsa, chifukwa wokondedwa nthawi zonse amakondwera diso. Koma, ngati muyang'ana munthu uyu, amayesera kubisala maso ake, kotero kuti palibe amene adaganizira za chikondi. Choncho, mnyamatayo akuwoneka ngati wochokera podsteshka, ndipo pamene wina amudalitsa, amayesa kuyang'ana mwamsanga. Kawirikawiri, achinyamata amaganiza kuti akhoza kubisa maganizo awo, komabe amadzipatulira okha. Ndikofunika kukhala munthu wokhala ndi mitsempha yachitsulo komanso kulepheretsa kuyang'anitsitsa maganizo awo. Si anthu ambiri omwe angathe kuchita izi, mwatsoka, kapena mwatsoka.
Ngati muli ndi mafunso ngati amenewa, ndiye mukufuna kumvetsa maganizo a mnyamata wina kapena mtsikana wina. Pogwiritsa ntchito manja ndi nkhope zosiyana, katswiri wa zamaganizo wodziŵa bwino maganizo angathe kuzindikira mwamsanga momwe akumvera, ngakhale atawasunga mosamala. Ngati mukuganiza kuti mumakonda munthu kapena, mayi wina amakonda bwenzi lanu, yang'anani momwe amachitira ndi mkaziyo. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti mnyamata adzachita zonse kuti apereke mphatso ndikupopera pafupi ndi iye, koma, osati maganizo ake, adziwonetsa yekha.
Choyamba, yang'anani momwe angayang'anire mtsikanayo m'maso ndikuwonetsa maganizo awa. Okonda amayang'ana kutali, chifukwa m'maso mwawo amawerenga mosangalala, pamene akuyang'ana munthu wokondedwayo. Ngati mnyamatayo ndi chidwi chake akuyenda pamsewu, amayesa kukhala pafupi naye, koma osayandikira, kukhulupirira kuti zidzasonyeza mmene amamvera. Ngati mtsikana akupempha chinachake, mwamunayo, nthawi zambiri, amadziyesa kuti safuna kwenikweni kukwaniritsa pempholo, koma, ngakhale zilizonse, nthawizonse zimatero. Amatsatira mwatsatanetsatane makhalidwe a amuna ena, omwe amatha kuwona kuchokera ku khalidwe lamtundu ndi maonekedwe, koma nthawi zonse amakhala chete. Ngati mnyamatayo amadziwa kuti mtsikanayo amasonyeza kuti akuyang'ana wina, samayamikira ndikuyang'ana kutali, kapena ayi, amayang'anitsitsa, popanda kuyang'ana. Komanso, mukhoza kuona kuti amamenya zipsinjo kapena akukuta mano. Pa mafunso onse, achinyamata mu zochitika zotere, yankhani zokhazokha ndi nthabwala kapena pemphani kuti musamamvere, ndikungoganiza kuti zonse zili bwino. Mwinamwake, koposa zonse, mu mkhalidwe uno, munthu amapereka chikhumbo chokhala wopanda chidwi. Iye amayesetsa kwambiri kuti asewere gawo lake, kotero zochita zake zimawoneka zosakhala zachilendo. Inde, izo zikhoza kuzindikiridwa ndi iwo omwe amazidziwa bwino kapena kuyang'anitsitsa.
Muzochitika zoterezi, achinyamata sadayitanidwe kuti awone atsikana, koma nthawi zonse amayesa kuyerekezera zomwezo kuti ntchitoyi ifike kwa iwo. Inde, mzimayi samatenga mkaziyo ndi dzanja ndipo salankhula naye chilichonse chokwanira. Amayesetsa kuchita mosangalala kapena mosayanjanitsika, akudziyesa kuti akufuna kubwerera ku kampani msanga. Ndikovuta kokwanira kumatsutsa malingaliro, koma n'zotheka, mwachitsanzo, mwadzidzidzi, kutanthauza kuyenda patali pang'ono. Mwinamwake, amavomereza popanda chidwi, koma adzakhalabe ndi mtsikanayo monga momwe akufunira ndipo sangasonyeze mawu kapena manja omwe ali ndi chikhumbo chochepa chochoka. Amuna samakhala olimba mtima ngati ayesa kuwoneka. M'malo mwake, anyamata ndi ofooka kwambiri kuposa atsikana. Iwo samadziwa momwe angamenyane ndi malingaliro awo pafupi ndi chinthu chousa moyo, panthawi yomwe mtsikanayo akupempha chinachake kapena amapereka chinachake. Pakadali pano, anyamatawa amatha kunena za chidani chakuda chomwe amachimva kwa mayi uyu, koma khalidwe lawo, pamene akudzipezana, limayankhula mosiyana. Ndiko kusagwirizana kwa khalidwe lachimuna zomwe zimakhala zosavuta kulingalira zokhuza mtima wake, zowona mtima ndi zochitika zake.
Ndichifukwa chake, ngati mwamuna akufuna kuti akhale pafupi ndi mkazi, ndiye kuti ndi bwino kuyang'anitsitsa zonse zomwe akunena ndi kuchita. Ngakhale mau ndi ziganizo zomwe mnyamatayo anganene zingamuperekere. Chowonadi ndi chakuti mnyamatayu akuyesera kumvetsa mofanana ndi mtsikanayo. Amakhazikika kotero kuti amayamikira khalidwe lake. Ngakhalenso ngati ndigwedezeka, koma mnyamatayo akuyesa kuti ndi yowonjezerapo, iye amachigwira mwakhama.
Kusunga chikondi, zedi, zopweteka komanso zovuta. Ndicho chifukwa ngakhale ngakhale atakhala ndi mkazi yemwe amamukonda, nthawi zambiri amakhala amanjenje komanso amanjenje. Zimangonena kuti kumverera kumafika kumapeto kwake ndipo sangathe kupirira nawo. Izi zimabweretsa mfundo yakuti ena amaganiza kuti mnyamata amachitira mtsikana kwambiri. Ndipotu, ayenera kuti amadana naye, koma osati iye, koma mwiniwake. Ndipo aloleni kuti anene ndi kupanga zonse zomwe zimangobwera m'malingaliro ake, malingaliro enieni amatha kuwerengedwa mu malingaliro ndi manja, mmaganizo omwe amatsika pamaso pake. Ngati mwamuna akufuna kukhala pafupi ndi mkazi, ndiye kuti amafunikiradi.