Momwe mungaphunzirire kudalira mwamuna

Chikondi popanda chikhulupiriro chiri chonse, koma ndithudi sichikonda. Nthawi zambiri zimachitika kuti kukhulupilira kwa mwamuna wake kumakhala kochepa pamene akuyesedwa kuti akhale ndi mphamvu zambirimbiri. Pali ziƔerengero, malinga ndi zomwe anthu oposa 70% okwatirana amadziwa bwino izi, osati mwakumva. Vuto lirilonse lingathetsedwe, choncho, mukhoza kuphunzira kudalira mwamuna.

Choyamba, nkofunikira kudziwa chifukwa chake, ngati chokhazikika kwambiri, amalepheretsa mkazi kuti asamakhulupirire mwamuna wake. Pano, zosankhazo ndizolemera komanso zopanda malire kuchokera ku mantha ozoloƔera ndi kudzikwanira mokwanira kwa zomwe sizinachitikepo kale. Aliyense yemwe anakumana ndi izi, kwayekha, amadziwitsa zomwe zimayambitsa vutoli.

Mndandanda wa zinthu zomwe anthu osakhulupilira bwenzi amatha, zikhoza kukhala, motalika kwambiri, chinthu chachikulu ndichoti maubwenzi omwe sagwirizane nawo samabweretsa chisangalalo kwa onse awiri.Ngati ubale wanu ndi wokondedwa kwa inu, muyenera kumenyana ndi kusakhulupirika kufikira mutheka. pamene kusakayika kotereku kumakwera pamutu mwanu, kumapangitsa kuti munthu asamvetse bwino, ganizirani izi: "Kodi pali chifukwa cha izi, kapena ndikungodzimangirira ndekha?" Ngati zikutanthauza kuti pali chifukwa, zimakhala zofunikira kumvetsetsa, kaya ndizokha kapena pamodzi ndi mnzawo. Zonse zimadalira kuti chirichonse chiri chovuta. Pambuyo pake, mukhoza kutuluka ndikuti musatanthauzira molakwika mawu oponyedwa mwangozi, kapena manja osalingalira.

Sipangakhale ubale wabwino, wogwirizana ngati palibe chidaliro pakati pa anthu awiri omwe amapanga maanja. Pano chilakolako chachikulu, ngati pali chikhumbo chokhulupirirana wina ndi mzake, ndiye kuti mukufunikira kutsatira malamulo ena:

  1. Simukusowa kuganizira za zomwe zinachitika mu ubale wakale, makamaka ngati palibe chabwino mwa iwo, komanso za ubale umene ungakhale ndi wina. Palibe chifukwa chofulumirira kuchita zinthu mopitirira malire, kuganiza kuti zonse zidzakhala zoipa monga nthawi yotsiriza, kapena kuganiza kuti ndi munthu wina zomwe zingakhale bwino. Khalani panopo, makamaka ngati muli omasuka komanso omasuka mu ubale wapano. Nchifukwa chiyani onse amawononga mitundu yonse ya "ifs"? Ndipotu, zimadziwika kuti malingaliro amatha, choncho dzichepetseni nokha ndi zokhazokha ndi zonse zomwe mudzakhala nazo.
  2. Osakayikira ndi kukayikira. Malo "sitepe yopita kumanja kumanzere - kuwombera" sivomerezeka kuti ubalewo ukhale. Musamangokakamiza mwamuna wanu, musamapemphe mafunso ndi amatsenga, chifukwa chakuti anali atachedwa kwa mphindi khumi kuntchito, kapena anayankha SMS yanu osati mwamsanga.
  3. Musapangitse munthu wanu kuti azidzikhululukira nthawi zonse pamaso panu. Yang'anirani mtundu uwu wa kulankhulana kuchokera kunja, kodi mumakondadi? Osamutsutsa nthawi zonse chifukwa cha chinachake, makamaka ngati kunyozedwa kulibe phindu ndipo alibe umboni uliwonse, kupatulapo malingaliro anu. Ganizirani za kuti posakhalitsa angakhumudwe nayo, ndipo akufuna kukuthawa.
  4. Khulupirirani munthu yemwe mumakhala naye pafupi. Ndipo bwanji? Chifukwa chake nkofunika kuti tinyengere wina ndi mzake ndi kukayikira nthawizonse, kufufuza maitanidwe kwa abwenzi ake kapena anzake kapena kuyang'ana mndandanda wa mayitanidwe ndi ma SMS pofunsanso mafunso ndi chilakolako cha mutu wakuti, "Anya uyu, yemwe munayankhula naye kwa mphindi khumi?"
  5. Pezani zosangalatsa, osati zonyoza. Mkhalidwe ndi wosiyana, monga momwe mungadziwire mwadzidzidzi kuti mulibe zovuta, simukuyenera kutsanulira pazinthu zowonongeka, ndi bwino kuseka palimodzi pa zomwe zinachitika.
  6. Kumbukirani, ngati mnzanuyo akuwona ndikukhulupilira mwa iye, adzakhala wodalirika komanso wotseguka ndi inu. Mwa kuyankhula kwina, mudzapeza ubale ndi mayankho abwino.

Ngati mupitiliza kumunyoza mwamuna wanu nthawi zonse popanda kukayikira, ndiye kuti simungamuzindikire, mum'pangitse kuti ayambe kuchita zinthu zomwe simukufunikira kuzidziwa. Amasankha izi kusiyana ndi kumvetsera madandaulo anu nthawi zonse, ndizomveka kukhala ndi mbali pambali, ndi chifukwa chenicheni cha kusakhutira kwanu.

Zonse zomwe tatchulazi sizikutanthauza kuti munthu amene alidi woyenera kukhulupirirana ndi amene ali. Mu moyo zonse zimachitika. Ndipo ngati munthuyo ndi yemwe samakuganizirani momveka bwino, sakusamala za inu, simungamufune zifukwa zomalizira ndikumusangalatsa. Simusowa kuti mudzipangitse nokha, koma simungabweretse chimwemwe ndi chimwemwe. Muyenera kuyesa kuyang'ana maso anu mwatcheru, kuona ulemu ndi zofooka zake. Anthu abwino salipo, ndi bwino kuvomereza. Ingodzisankhira nokha kuti ndizo ziti za zofooka zawo zomwe zakonzeka kuvomereza, ndi zomwe siziri.