Kugonana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha nthawi zonse kumakhala chizindikiro chokhazikika, mabanja osakwatiwa atha kukhala ndi chibwenzi cholimba komanso chosatha kwa zaka zambiri. Kufikira posachedwapa, maanjawa sangathe ngakhale kulota banja lonse, ana, pokhapokha ufulu wokhala.
Anthuwa adaphunzira kulekerera anthu omwe sali ovomerezeka mwachizoloŵezi mosalekeza, anayamba kukhala ndi chidaliro pakati pa anthu amodzi ndi amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. Kupita patsogolo, zikuwoneka. Koma sanapite monga momwe ambiri angakonde.
Ngakhale kuti mayiko ambiri ali okhulupirika kuukwati wa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha ndipo maubwenzi amenewa akhala osadabwitsa, ndizovuta kwambiri kuti banja lonse likhale lolimba kwa anthu ogonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha.
Kodi mungapange bwanji chithandizo? M'dziko liti kuti mukwatirane? Kodi amaloledwa kupanga mgwirizano waukwati? Kodi lidzakhala ndi mphamvu? Kodi tchalitchi chimapereka bwanji maukwati oterewa ndipo ndizotheka kukhala ndi ukwati? Kodi chidzasintha ndi chiyani?
Iyi ndi mndandanda wochepa wa mafunso omwe amagonjetsa aliyense wokonda gay kapena abwenzi achiwerewere. Chilichonse chiri chovuta apa: kuchokera ku lamulo mpaka kusankha masayina pa makadi oitanira. Mwinamwake, ndizo zonse zovuta zomwe zimalepheretsa anthu ambiri omwe si achikhalidwe kutenga chisankho kuti apange banja. Koma mutha kuthetsa vuto lililonse, ngakhale lovuta kwambiri ngati ili. Chokondweretsa kwambiri ndi chakuti palidi kusankha.
Chikondi motsutsana ndi lamulo.
Ngati mukuganiza kuti ndinu munthu yemwe amakondadi mwamuna kapena mkazi mnzanu monga iye, pamene akufuna kuti akhale wolimba, komanso wofunika kwambiri, amadziwika bwino, amayamba mantha chifukwa chakuti chinthu chonsecho sichiwoneka chovuta.
Tiyerekeze kuti zoperekazo zinapangidwa, ndipo poyankhidwa, "Yes" yamtengo wapatali inamveka. Chotsatira ndi chiyani? Kodi ndi ndani kuti apite ndi chikhumbo chawo chokhala okwatirana?
Choyamba, muyenera kudziŵa kuti kutali ndi dziko lonse lamulo lidzakhala pambali pa okonda.
Ngakhale Holland wodziwika kuti amadziwa kuti amuna kapena akazi okhaokha ali ndi ufulu wokwatirana mu 2001, koma, chofunika kwambiri, amadziwika! Europe ndiye woyamba kusiya machitidwe achikale pa chikhazikitso chaukwati, kotero ukwati ku Holland, Denmark, Sweden, Norway, Spain, Canada, ngakhale ku South Africa kale kale ndi mchitidwe wa chiwerewere ndi azimayi padziko lonse lapansi. Ndi m'mayiko awa omwe mwamuna ndi mkazi aliyense amadziwika kuti ndi mwamuna ndi mkazi, mwamuna ndi mkazi wake, kapena mkazi ndi mkazi wake, ndipo mmalo mwa kupenya kwa oblique iwo adzapatsidwa ndi chidwi chenicheni cha chimwemwe. Kuti muchite izi, zongokwanira kuti mukhale ndi chikhumbo chokwatirana mu boma laboma, kulipira ntchito zofunikira za boma ndi misonkho, ndiyeno mukhoza kutumiza maitanidwe mosamala.
Posachedwapa, ziphunzitso zachinyengo zinayamba ku Czech Republic, Germany, France, Belgium.
Zimakhala zovuta kwambiri kwa anthu a ku US - m'dziko lino amawona ngati anthu okwatirana okhaokha angathe kukwatirana, ngakhale kuti ali ndi ufulu wa munthu aliyense. US ndi dziko la zovuta, ndipo izi sizili zabwino nthawi zonse. Ndipano nokha mukhoza kukwatirana pafupi ndi vase yomwe mumaikonda, koma kukumana ndi zopinga mu njira yogwirizananso ndi okondedwa anu.
Ndipo sizili zophweka kwa nzika za kummawa, makamaka maiko achi Muslim, komwe chikondi cha kugonana chomwecho chimatsutsidwa ndipo ngakhale kuzunzidwa.
M'mayiko ambiri otukuka pali njira ina yothetsera ukwati kwa anthu a mtundu uliwonse. Mwachitsanzo, Britain siinathetseretu chikhalidwe cha anthu kudzikoli, choncho anthu omwe alibe malingaliro awo sangalandire kalata ya ukwati pano. Koma m'madera onse a dziko lino amavomereza kuti mgwirizano wa anthu ogonana ndi amuna okhaokha, womwe uli ndi ufulu, wosiyana ndi ufulu wa banja lachikhalidwe. Ngakhale kusudzulana kwa anthu ogonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha ku Britain kudzachitika kudzera m'khothi ndi gawo lopangidwa ndi katundu ndi njira zina zomwe amamiliyoni a amuna ndi akazi amodzi amatha kupitako.
Ulendo muutumiki wa Cupid.
Monga mukudziwira, kufunafuna nthawi zonse kumapanga ndondomeko komanso kukwatirana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha osati zosiyana.
Maloto okondedwa okwatirana ndi ovomerezeka angakhalebe maloto kwa ambiri achiwerewere ndi azimayi, ngati osakhala amalonda ndi osakondera. Chiwerengero chachikulu cha anthu ogonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha sakhala ndi mwayi wokhala mbanja, ngakhale kuti mayiko ambiri ali okonzeka kulembetsa ukwati wawo. N'chifukwa chake mabungwe ambiri oyendayenda amapereka maukwati otchedwa "njira". Aloleni iwo asakhale ndi malamulo, koma mwinamwake sizotsutsana ndi mwambo waukwati.
Pa zosankha za okondedwa palizilumba zowonongeka ndi mitundu yawo, ndipo Europe ndi nyumba zake zokhalamo, olemera m'mbiri komanso mafumu omwe ali ndi ziphuphu. Pamapeto pake, zofunikira zambiri sizithunzithunzi zolemekezeka mu pasipoti, ndipo tsiku lamatsenga ndi "Inde" akudikira kwa nthawi yaitali poyankha kuti: "Mukuvomera?".
Kuwonjezera apo, chisankho chokhudzana ndi mwambo wophiphiritsira chimatanthauzanso ufulu wosankha mbali iliyonse ya dziko ndi kuthekera kuti tisadalire pafupipafupi.
Pafupi ndi chonyansa.
Ndipo vuto lokhalo lokhazikika muzochitika zachikondi linali ndipo limakhalabe mpingo. Ziribe kanthu momwe maanja achiwerewere akulota ukwati ndi madalitso, mpingo umatsutsanabe. Chipembedzo chilichonse cha dziko lapansi chikana chikondi cha amuna okhaokha ndipo ichi ndi mzere umene chipiriro cha atsogoleri achipembedzo chimatha.
Koma ngati akukhumba, zotsatirazi zikhoza kupezeka kuchokera pazochitika zilizonse ndipo sizingatheke kukonza woyimba atavala mwinjiro omwe madalitso ake alibe mphamvu iliyonse.
Anthu okwatirana okhaokha angathe kukwatira mu mpingo wa Swedish Episcopal. Zoona, nkofunika kuvomereza chikhulupiriro ichi, koma ngati chikukhumba, vutoli ndi losasinthika.
Chifukwa cha chiyani?
Nanga ndi chiyani kuti zonsezi zikhale zovuta ndi kuthana ndi zopinga zambiri ngati zingatheke kukhala palimodzi pokha popanda kuika dzikoli kutchuka?
Funso labwino lomwe anthu onse amafunsidwa popanda kupatulapo, mosasamala kanthu za kayendedwe kawo. Pali yankho lalikulu ku funso ili, lomwe limaposa kukayikira kulikonse. Ndipo yankho ili ndi ana. Sitiyenera kuiwala za chikhumbo chokhala makolo , zomwe zimawoneka mosasamala za yemwe mumakonda komanso mosasamala kuti ndinu ndani.
Anthu okwatirana okhaokha sangakhale ndi ana wamba chifukwa chodziwika bwino. Ngati mgwirizano wa amayi uli ndi mwayi wogwiritsa ntchito zopindulitsa zachipatala, mwachitsanzo, kutseketsa mwadzidzidzi, ndiye kuti mabanja omwe ali ndi amuna amakhala osasankhidwa. Kulera ana ndi njira yabwino yothetsera vutoli, koma njirayi ndi yovuta kwambiri kuposa yonse ya ukwati peripeteias. Anthu okwatirana okhaokha amakhala ndi mwayi wokhala makolo, koma monga momwe zilili ndi mabanja achibadwidwe, operekedwa kwa omwe ali okwatirana, komanso omwe mgwirizano wawo wakhala ukuyesedwa mphamvu.
Chilichonse chomwe chinali, mwayi wokhala wosangalala ndi chilichonse, ndipo pali njira zambiri zomwe mungakwaniritsire, muyenera kuzigwiritsa ntchito panthawi yoyenera.