Kwa anthu ena, chikondi ndi chilakolako alibe kusiyana. Ena amawasokoneza nthawi zonse, osamvetsetsa kuti zimawasiyanitsa bwanji. Kumva kukhudzika, iwo amaganiza kuti ichi ndi chikondi. Chimene chimapasula pang'onopang'ono. Chifukwa chilakolako chosadziteteza chingadye munthu. Chifukwa cha izo, anthu amataya malingaliro awo, ndipo nthawizina amafa.
Mu dikishonale "Ozhegova" chikondi chimatanthawuza, ngati mphamvu yowona, kudzikonda komanso chikondi chenicheni. Chilakolako, ngati kukhumba kwakukulu. Mafotokozedwe awiriwa otsutsana adzatithandiza kusiyanitsa maganizo awa. Mwaziwonetsero izi zikuonekeratu kuti chikondi chimachokera pa chibwenzi, pamene chilakolako chimangokhala ndi chikhumbo. Kuonjezera apo, amasiyananso ndi mitundu ya maubwenzi.
Koma nthawi zina zimakhala zovuta kufotokoza chilakolako ndi chikondi, chifukwa chilakolako chingakhale pamaso pa chikondi. Tiyeni tiyesere kusanthula ubale ndi chikondi. Izi zidzatithandiza kuphunzira kuphunzira nawo.
Kodi chikondi chimasonyezedwa bwanji mu ubale pakati pa anthu? Pamene chikondi chimakhala mu ubale wa anthu awiri, aliyense wa iwo amayamikira kwambiri chimwemwe ndi zilakolako za wina. Chikoka cha chikondi chimadziwonetsera mwa njira zosiyanasiyana: kuyambitsa nthawi yanu yopatsa, ntchito ndi mawu. Pa chikondi awiriwa amatsatirana wina ndi mzake, nthawi zonse amakumbukira momwe akumvera. Wokondedwa aliyense amaika mnzake pamtunda. Pazochitika zoterezi, banjali limathera nthawi yawo yaufulu, malinga ndi chikondi komanso ulemu. Ntchito iliyonse imalingaliridwa ndi kusankhidwa ndi kuchenjeza kwakukulu, kuganizira momwe akumvera. Ngati kusagwirizana, onse awiri akufuna kugwirizana, kupeza chiyanjano kapena njira yowonjezera.
Pomalizira, maubwenzi ochokera pachikondi, monga lamulo, amakhala nthawi zonse. Chifukwa kukhalapo kwa chikondi kumalola abambo kudutsa mavuto ndi mavuto omwe amayamba pakati pawo. Kulingalira ndi nkhawa zimathandiza banjali kukula, ndi kupirira mayesero a nthawi.
Mukuwonetsa bwanji ubale wokondana? Ubale wokhumudwa sungathe nthawi zonse kukhala ndi zotsatira zoipa. Koma sangathe kukhala otsimikiza komanso abwino ngati chikondi. Monga chikondi, chilakolako chimakhudzanso maubwenzi, zochita ndi mawu a anthu.
Kusiyanitsa kwakukulu pakati pa chilakolako ndi chikondi - mu chiyanjano cha okondedwa amachititsa chisangalalo cha wina apamwamba kuposa iwo okha, ndipo mwachangu anthu ogonana amafuna kuti akwaniritse zofuna zawo, ndi kuziyika pa malo oyambirira ndi apamwamba.
Chofunika kwambiri cha egoism, chomwe chiri mu ubale wokondana, pang'onopang'ono chimawombera ndipo chimakhudza zonse zomwe zimachitika ndi machitidwe awo onse. Pamene ali ndi chikondi chenicheni, banjali likufuna kupeza chiyanjano ndi yankho limene onse awiri adzasangalale, muukwati wokondana, aliyense wa iwo ali ndi chilakolako chofuna kukwaniritsa zofuna zawo, mosasamala momwe akumvera, komanso wokondwa.
Chikhalidwe chomaliza cha ubale wokondweretsa ndi nthawi yochepa ya ubale wokha. Chifukwa ubale wokondana ulipo chifukwa cha chilakolako ndi chilakolako. Ndipo pamene cholinga chikukwaniritsidwa, chilakolako chimatha, ndipo wokondedwayo sakhalanso ofunika. Popanda chilakolako, maganizo amayamba kufalikira ndi kusokonezeka.
Kuwonjezera pamenepo, khalidwe lachikondi cha ubale - kudzikonda ndi kupanda ulemu - kumapangitsanso kuyanjana ndi phokoso.
Chikondi sichikhoza kukhala mkati mwa chilakolako. Ndipo chilakolako chingathe kukhalapo mwa chikondi. Chilakolako sichikuphatikizapo chikondi. Chifukwa chakuti khalidwe lalikulu la kudzikonda silitilole kuti tilowe mu chikondi monga chothandizira mu ubale wokondana. Kuika zokhumba zanu pamwamba pa zilakolako za abwenzi kumachotsa mapangidwe a chikondi.
Koma kukhalapo kwa chilakolako mu chiyanjano cha chikondi nthawi zambiri kumawonetsedwa ndi chikhumbo chachizolowezi chokhala pafupi ndi mnzanuyo. Ngakhale kuti sichidutsa chikondi, izi ndi mbali yathanzi ya chiyanjano ndipo zingayambitse mgwirizano waukulu kwambiri pakati pa okondedwa.
Kupatukana kwa chikondi kuchokera ku chilakolako kungakhale kovuta m'njira zambiri. Koma tiyenera nthawi zonse kukumbukira kusiyana pakati pa chikondi ndi chilakolako - chiyanjano cha chikondi chimachokera pa kudzidalira ndi chisamaliro, pamene chilakolako chimadziwika ndi kudzikonda komanso kusasamala. Koma simungatsutsane wina ndi mnzake.