"Mimba, nkhani zokhuza kubala" ndi nkhani ya lero, yomwe ndikukuuzani za momwe mnzangayo akumvera.
Kuno pafupifupi miyezi isanu ndi iwiri yonse yomwe ndatenga mimba yatha, ndipo pa phwando lomalizira, mayiyu anandiuza kuti: "Chilichonse, kunyamula thumba, kukonzekera maganizo, tsiku lina ayenera kubereka!". Ndabwerera kunyumba ndikusangalala kuti posachedwa ndikumana ndi mwana wanga, nthawi yayitali ya kuyembekezera ikufika kumapeto. Koma pamene ndinkamvetsa ndikuzindikira kuti ndikubereka posakhalitsa, kumverera kwa chisangalalo pang'onopang'ono kunalowetsedwa ndi chisokonezo chosiyana. Ndinazindikira kuti ndikuwopa kwambiri. Nthawi yomweyo ndinaiwala zinthu zonse zodabwitsa zomwe zinandipatsa ine m'miyezi isanu ndi iwiriyi: chimwemwe choyamba pamene ndinazindikira kuti ndikuyembekezera mwana; dongosolo la ana; kugula zovala za mwana; dzina labwino. Mutuwo unakulungidwa ndi lingaliro limodzi lokha - kubereka, ndi lopweteka kwambiri!
Ndikuwopa chikhalidwe cha coward ndi ululu. Ndipo adawopa ululu wobadwa, ngakhale kuti anafuna kubala mwachibadwa. Kuopa kwanga kunalimbikitsidwanso poona mafilimu ambiri omwe mayiyo akubadwa ayenera kuti adafuula (sanafuule, koma pakhosi nthawi zonse). Inde, ndi "abwenzi abwino" abwenzi, amayi, onse ankatsatizana momveka bwino, momwe zinali zopweteka kupirira iwo, komanso kuti gehena ikupita mpaka liti, kuti mapeto kapena mphepo sizingatheke.
Zonsezi, ndithudi, sizinawonjezere ku chiyembekezo changa ndi malingaliro abwino. Koma inu simungakhoze kupita kuchipatala ndi mawondo akugwedeza. Ndi mantha anga ndinafunika kuchita chinachake. Ndipo masiku angapo otsalira ndinayenera kuphunzira mabuku osiyanasiyana pofufuza mawu okondedwa "kubereka sikuvulaza." Zoonadi, sindinapezepo chilichonse chonga ichi, komabe, ndinatsimikiziranso za kusintha, nkhani zokhudzana ndi kubala mwana. Sindinathe kuthawa mantha anga, ndikusakaniza kapena kusangoganizira. M'malo mwake, ndinaganiza zoziganizira ndikuziyika pa masalefu. Ndipo ndicho chimene ine ndiri nacho.
Choyamba, ndinavomera ndikuzindikira kuti ndikupwetekedwabe. Panalibe vuto limodzi m'mbiri kuti mkazi anabala mopweteka. Koma! M'lingaliro lenileni la mawu, sipadzakhalanso zopweteka zomwe sitingathe kuzipirira. Inde, zimapweteka, koma, kachiwiri, zololedwa. Pambuyo pake, munthu aliyense ali wapadera m'njira yake ndipo aliyense ali ndi malo ake enieni. Ndipo sindikukayikira kuti kwa munthu aliyense wokongoka Chilengedwe chidzapereka zowawa zambiri monga izi kapena zomwe zingathe kupirira. Osakhalanso.
Panthawiyi, mukhoza kuyang'ana pa malo a chipembedzo, omwe amati Mulungu amakonda aliyense. Tonsefe tinalengedwa ndi Mlengi, ndipo amatikonda tonse mofanana. Kubeleka ndi ndondomeko yomwe adawonetsedweratu ndi Iye. Iye, monga Mlengi wachikondi, sakanatumiza ana ake, kuzunzika kosatha. Apo ayi, lingaliro lonse la chikondi, pa chipembedzo chomwe chiri maziko, akhala akuwonekera kale.
Ndipo kuchokera kuchipatala, munthu akhoza kunena kuti chiwalo chirichonse chimapatsidwa "analgesic system" yomwe imayambitsa kupweteka kwa ululu. Ngati zimakhala zopweteka kwambiri, ndiye kuti zinthu monga morphine zimayamba kumasulidwa, zomwe zimachepetsa ululu wa thupi. Pali momwe zinalili zowonongeka.
Chachiwiri, ndinazindikira kuti ndikuopa kufa panthawi ya kubala, monga momwe zinaliri zaka za m'ma Middle Ages. Koma ngakhale apo, mantha anayamba kutha msanga pakuzindikira kuti sayansi ndi zamakono zakhala zikupita patsogolo kwambiri. Pafupi ndi ine adzakhala akatswiri oyenerera omwe angazindikire, ngati chinachake chikulakwika, ndipo pakapita nthawi chidzapereka thandizo lofunikira.
Chachitatu, ndinasiya kumvetsera kwa amayi onse omwe anali "abwenzi" omwe anali "ta-ah-hurts!", Ndikuganiza kuti ndikanakhala zosiyana, chifukwa ndinkakonzekeretsa maganizo. Kusangalala maganizo kumakhala kovuta kwambiri pamayesero ovuta. Ndipo nkhani ya munthu wina woyandikana naye, yemwe adayang'ana tsiku lobadwa, adawonera filimu yonena za akazi omwe amazunzidwa ndi a fascist m'misasa ya ndende pa Nkhondo Yaikulu Yachikristu, inanditsogolera ku lingaliro lodzipangira mtundu wina wa "mpikisano wa ululu", umene sudzawopsya kuzunzika. Pankhaniyi, mnzako, atatopa kwambiri chifukwa cha nkhondo, ankaganiza kuti amayi omwe ali m'misasa anali kuzunzidwa chifukwa cha amayi okhawo, choncho sakanatha kupirira mwana wake.Ndinayenera kuganizira ndi kumvetsetsa zonse zomwe ndatchulazi kamodzi, chisanadze chochitika chodabwitsa chomwe chinachitika. Koma pamene nkhondoyo inayamba, ndinapita kuchipatala mwamtendere ndikukhala ndi chidaliro kuti chirichonse chidzakhala bwino!