Komabe, mu mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya zosangalatsa za kugonana, pali zowonjezera ndi zosokoneza. Ngati simukudziwa malamulo oyambirira a khalidwe pa bedi, ndiye kuti zochitika zogonana zingakhale zitsanzo za kuyenda koopsa kudutsa m'migodi. Pali zifukwa zambiri za izi. Choyamba, mungathe kupunthwa mwangwiro pazomwe simunamvere. Chachiwiri, mwa kuvomereza chinachake chatsopano, mukhoza kuwononga thanzi lanu labwino ndi thanzi lanu. Chachitatu, pali mitundu yosiyanasiyana yochita masewera olimbana ndi kugonana komwe kumachepetsa kuchepetsa kugonana kapena kuzindikira. Ndiyeno mmalo mosiyana pa bedi, mungathe kupeza chilakolako chonse chokhumba ndi kulephera kuwona zolaula.
Kusewera pabedi kwa munthu wokondedwa sikuyenera kutembenukira ku gehena ndikuwonetsetsa thanzi lanu labwino pangozi. Osati kugwera mumsampha wa mavuto poyesa kugona? Muyenera kudziwa mfundo zingapo zofunika.
Choyamba, tifunikira kudziwa zomwe zimatchulidwa kuti ndizovomerezeka. Ndizosafunika kuti tipite patsogolo, ngakhale zili zomvetsa chisoni. Mwamwayi, palibe amene adatsutsa zokhudzana ndi kugonana, choncho nthawi zina munthu ayenera kuvomereza yekha kuti sizingatheke kuyesa ndi zonse zomwe akufuna ndi amuna ena. Monga momwe palibe mwayi woti muyesere nawo zomwe mumalota, chifukwa iwo sizilandiridwa.
Ngati mutachita chinthu chomwe mzimu umatsutsa, mungapeze matenda ngati ofanana ndi matenda a nkhanza za kugonana. Chifukwa cha maonekedwe a matendawa, mwayi wotsitsimula ukhoza kutha, ndipo poipa kwambiri, pangakhale zizindikiro za vaginismus ndi mavuto ena omwe amachititsa kuti kugonana kusatheke. Choncho sikoyenera kuchita chinachake kwa wokondedwa wanu pabedi amene amachititsa manyazi ndi mantha.
Pankhani imeneyi ndikofunikira kuganizira zofuna za anthu. Ngati savomereza mitundu ina ya kugonana, musaumirire. Izi zidzangowonjezera kusokonezeka kwa chikhalidwe chonse cha chiyanjano ndipo zidzakulitsa mavuto osayenera a kugonana.
Mfundo yachiwiri yofunikira ndiyofunika kupeza chidziwitso cha zachipatala ponena za kuvomereza ndi zosayenera za masewera ena. Mwachitsanzo, ngati mukuganiza kuti onse awiri akufuna kugonana ndi abambo, ndiye kuti muyenera kuphunzira mabuku onse a zachipatala pa mutu uwu. Zidzakhala zokwanira komanso zokhudzana ndi nkhani zokhudzana ndi kugonana kuti mudziwe kuti simungasakanize kugonana kwa abambo ndi abambo popanda kuchita njira zoyenera kutsata pambuyo pa anal. Komanso njira yeniyeni ya kugonana imatanthauza kudziŵa maziko a chitetezo, ndikofunika kupeŵa kuvulala kosafunikira.
Mfundo yachitatu yofunika ndi kudziwa za masewera omwe angayambitse zolakwira zokhudzana ndi kugonana. Kusewera pabedi kwa munthu wokondedwa sikuyenera kukupangitsani kukhala wolumala, osakhumba kugonana. Kwa mkazi aliyense masewera omwe amachititsa ngozi ya kukhumudwa kwakukulu kwa maganizo ndiyekha. Koma pali malamulo apadziko lonse. Mwachitsanzo, anthu ogonana amalimbikitsa kuti azipewa kugonana kwa magulu osiyanasiyana, kuchoka pa kugwedeza. Ziribe kanthu momwe mumakakamizira mwamuna kuti ayesere kugonana kwa atatu kapena osinthana nawo, musaganizane kugwirizana. Mfundo yakuti mwa amuna atangoyamba kuchita zachiwerewere pagulu, potency imalephera mofulumira. Ndipo kubwezeretsa kukhumudwa kumeneku kumatha kukhala kovuta komanso kosavuta, komabe, ogonana ndi abambo m'dziko lathu sizitsika mtengo. Ndipo amai amatha kuvutika ndi kudzimva kuti ndi olakwa, zomwe zingayambitse kugonana. Kuonjezera apo, nthawi zambiri amuna omwe adawona mkazi wawo kapena mbuye wawo m'manja mwa munthu wina, amaliza kukondana naye, mosasamala kanthu zomwe adalonjeza kale.
Inde, kuti muyambe kuyesera mu gawo la kugonana, kulimba mtima kwina kofunikira. Sikuti anthu onse ali okonzekera pa magawo oyambirira a chiyanjano kukambirana momasuka za zilakolako zawo ndikufunsa za iwo mkazi. Ndiyeno, pamene ubalewu ukuyamba kukhala wolimba kwambiri, mwadzidzidzi kuti zofuna ndi mwayi pazogonana sizikugwirizana.
Ndipotu, pogwiritsa ntchito masewero olimbana ndi kugonana, mabungwe oterewa amangokhala ochepa chabe. Ichi ndi chinthu chofunika kwambiri cha kugonana kwabwino kwa amuna ndi akazi. Masewera achiwerewere sangathe kukhala ndi chilakolako chokwatirana. Iwo amatha kuthandiza banjali kukhala ndi maubwenzi ndi kuwabweretsa ku msinkhu watsopano. Monga malamulo, maseŵera ambiri pabedi amathandiza mkazi kumudziwa bwino thupi lake, kumvetsa ndi kuzindikira zilakolako zake. Ndipo pambali pake, iwo akhoza kukhala magwero achikondi kwa amayi omwe ali ndi mavuto ena.