Makonzedwe a ana - timakonza limodzi

Mwina, aliyense akudziwa kale kuti zovuta zathu zonse zimachokera muubwana. Koma ndi owerengeka omwe amadziwa chifukwa chake komanso nthawi yeniyeni yonseyi imasinthidwa m'malingaliro a mwanayo. Pakalipano, ndikofunika kwambiri kuthana ndi nkhaniyi kuti musapangitse mwana wanuyo mavuto.


Ndipotu, makumi asanu ndi atatu amodzi mwazaka zana, zonsezi zimachitidwa ndi zolinga zabwino, zofuna kuchita zonse monga momwe zilili zofunika ndikuphunzitsa munthu "woyenera". Njira imodzi yothetsera mavuto ambiri m'maganizo a mwanayo ndi kugwiritsa ntchito kudziona ngati wolakwa.

Malingaliro osadziwika

Makolo amagwiritsa ntchito mawu ngati amenewa tsiku ndi tsiku kuti: "Sindikusowa mnyamata (mtsikana) woipa", "Ndikukuchitirani zonse, ndipo inu ...", "Maso anga sanakuyang'ane", " chifukwa inu nokha mavuto "," Mukundisangalatsa bwanji "ndi zina zotero.

Zikuganiziridwa kuti mwanayo, akamva zodzudzulidwa izi, amadzimva kuti ndi wolakwa chifukwa chosatsutsa zoyembekezera za makolo kapena kuchita chinachake cholakwika ndipo adzakhala ndi chilakolako chokhala bwino, kukhala "mnyamata wabwino" kapena mtsikana. Zingamveke, ndi chiyani cholakwika ndi zimenezo? Choipa ndi chakuti mwanjira imeneyi, lamulo lokhazikika "sichikhala" likugwiritsidwa ntchito.

Mwanayo amayamba kudzidzimva yekha ngati chotchinga ku moyo wa makolo ake, monga ngongole yawo yosatha, chifukwa anam'patsa moyo, chisamaliro ndi chisamaliro. Ndipo ngati wobwereketsa akukakamizika "kulipira ngongole", kukhala zomwe makolo ake akufuna kuti iye akhale. Zopanda kunena kuti, ngongole ngati "mphatso ya moyo" sizingakhoze kulipidwa, ndipo zimasewera pa izi zosasinthika kuti vuto la mwana likhoza kukhala losatha.

Chibodza "chaching'ono"

Musanagwiritse ntchito njirayi, ganizirani:

uwu ndi mtundu wachinyengo cha maganizo. Potero, mumasunthira maudindo anu pamapewa a ana anu. Iwe ngati kuti umati kwa iye: "apa iwe unabadwira, ndipo ine nthawi yomweyo ndinali ndi mavuto ambiri." Ndipo kuchokera apa "Ndatopa ndi iwe, sindikusowa iwe, ndatopa ndi iwe, sindinadziwe kuti ndiwe woipa, ndi zina zotero".

Koma mwanayo atasankha funso pa kubadwa sanavomereze nawo mbali iliyonse. Kuti mukhale ndi chibadwidwe - chinali chosankha chanu chonse ndipo udindo wa sitepeyi ili ndi inu.

Kotero musayembekezere kuyamikira chifukwa cha mtolo umene mwakhala nawo ndipo muyamikire za tsogolo la mwana yemwe muli nawo, osati chifukwa cha chithunzi chomwe chachitika m'malingaliro anu.

Vuto lina la maganizo amenewa ndi lakuti mwanayo, chifukwa cha kusakhwima kwa chidziwitso, amatha kuganiza kuti zikanakhala zabwino ngati siziri konse.

Kenaka amayi anga anali ndi nthawi yoonera TV, kuwerenga buku, kumasuka bwino. Njira yokhayo yothetsera vutoli ndi kudzipha, koma n'kosatheka kwa mwanayo.

Choncho, amayamba kugwiritsa ntchito pulogalamu ya kudzipha ndi matenda, matenda, komanso pambuyo pokula - njira zotero zowonongeka monga kumwa mankhwala osokoneza bongo kapena uchidakwa. Pambuyo pake, mwanayo amadziwa kufunika kwa moyo wake mpaka momwe zimakhalira ndi chimwemwe ndi chimwemwe kwa ena.

ndipo, potsiriza, kukhazikitsa koteroko kungatseke munthu wamng'onoyo njira zonse zodzidziwitsa yekha. Amayesa kubwezera "ngongole" kwa makolo ake, m'zinthu zonse ku zikhumbo zawo ndi zofuna zawo. Koma malingaliro a makolo onena za luso ndi mwayi wa ana sungagwirizane kwathunthu ndi zenizeni.

Karl Gustov Jung nthawi ina analemba kuti: "Ana amayesetsa kukwaniritsa zomwe makolo awo sanachite, amakakamizidwa ndi zilakolako zomwe makolo sangathe kuzizindikira. Njira zoterezi zimapanga ziphunzitso zapamwamba. "

Ndipo mwanayo, kutenga chisankho cha makolo, amakhala ndi vuto lovuta. Moyo wanga wonse ukuyang'ana mmbuyomo kwa amayi anga ndi abambo, iye sanapindulepo kanthu kalikonse pa moyo ndipo, pambuyo pake, kuchokera kwa makolo ake amapeza chitonzo chifukwa cholephera kuthetsa mavuto ake ndi kukhala ndi udindo pa moyo wake ndi miyoyo ya okondedwa ake.

Kupanda zonse

Chiyambi cha maofesi. Kawirikawiri, ana omwe amadzimva kuti ali ndi mlandu chifukwa cha kukhalapo kwawo kwa makolo, amathamangira ku ufulu, amayamba kuchita zinthu mopitirira malire. Malinga ndi zomwe ana a psychologist amanena, achinyamata 90% omwe ali ovuta ndi achinyamata osakwatiwa omwe amadzimva kuti ndi olakwa kwa makolo awo.

Ndipo mwazifukwa zochepa chabe ndizotheka kulankhula za matenda a psyche. Kuwonetsa ena khalidwe lopweteketsa, lopanda nzeru, amayesetsa kukhala "chilango".

Zimadziwika kuti chilango chimachepetsa kudzimva kuti ndi wolakwa ndipo ana oterewa amayesa kuchotsa zovuta zamkati, osadziwa mosamala nthawi yomwe munthu angadzimve kuti ndi wolakwa chifukwa cha chinthu chokongoletsera, chomveka komanso chotsimikizika.

Gwirani zenera - muli ndi mlandu - munakumbidwa, munalangidwa. Zonse ziri zomveka. Inu munabadwira - makolo ali otopa (iwo amapereka mphamvu zochuluka, ndalama, etc.) - ndinu olakwa. Izi zimachitika nthawi zonse pamapewa komanso akuluakulu, psyche ya mwanayo ndi izi ndipo ndizosatheka kumvetsa.

Zotsatira zomvetsa chisoni

Chitsanzo chodziwika cha chodzidzimutsa chodzimva chowononga moyo ndi nkhani ya wojambula wa Hollywood, Jennifer Aniston. Kulephereka kwanthawi zonse mu moyo wake waumwini kunamupangitsa iye kukhala "wotchuka" mpaka "wotchuka." Chifukwa chakuti sakonda kulankhula za ubwana wake, mukhoza kumvetsera ubale wake ndi amayi ake.

Makolo ake anasudzulana ali ndi zaka 9 - bamboyo anakwatira mkazi wina, amayi ake anatsala okha. Osakhala ndi mwayi wopambana pazochita zamalonda kapena pa "pepala laumwini", mkaziyo sanalole mwana wake kuyang'ana TV chifukwa ... "Ndikudziwa kuti izi zikumveka zopusa - chifukwa bambo anga ankakonda kusewera panthawiyi m'mutu wakuti" Masiku a Moyo Wathu ". Aniston akuuza. "Simudzakhulupirira, sindinaloledwe kupita ku mafilimu mpaka ndikafike zaka khumi ndi ziwiri."

Mwinamwake, pamaso pa amayi, msungwanayo anali chifukwa cha zolephereka ndi chikumbutso chokhumudwitsa cha mwamuna wake wakale: mayiyo ankawona kuti mtsikanayo ndi woipa kwambiri ndipo nthawi zonse ankaseka kwambiri.

Ngakhale kupindula kwa Jennifer pazinthu zowonjezera za "Friends", zomwe zinamupangitsa iye fano kwa atsikana ambiri, sanabweretsere chidaliro. "Ndili ndi mgwirizano wachilendo, ngakhale ndi galasi la kunyumba - mwachikondi-ndimadana. Masiku ena ndimakonda kwambiri kuposa ena. "

Kwa zaka 12, mtsikanayo sanalankhulane ndipo sanalankhulane pafoni ndi amayi ake. Mwachionekere, iye anayesera kuiwala zonse zomwe anauziridwa ndi mwana wake.

Lamulo "sichikhala" mu malingaliro limakwaniritsidwa m'njira ziwiri. Pa nthawi ina, mwanayo amapeza kuika "osakhala moyo wanu, koma moyo wanga". Mmodzi, "moyo wanu uli m'njira yanga." Pachiyambi choyamba, pokhala wamkulu, munthu amayamba kudziyesa wopanda pake, wosakhoza kanthu. Iye ayenera kutsimikizira nthawi zonse kuti iye ndi wofunika chinachake, chinachake chimatanthauza kuti iye ndi woyenera chikondi ndi ulemu.

Pokhala osapeza "umboni" okwanira wa kufunika kwake popanda kulandira chikondi ndi kuvomereza, amapita mu kuvutika maganizo, kufunafuna chitonthozo cha mowa, mankhwala osokoneza bongo, amathetsa vuto la kudzipha. Chimodzimodzinso chikuchitika ndi ana omwe akudalira kuti akhala akusokoneza makolo awo miyoyo yawo yonse, kuwasamalira iwo ndi mavuto.

Kotero samalani ndi mawu, makolo okondedwa. Ndipo kumbukirani kuti choipa chachikulu kwa mwana ndi kusowa kwa chikondi chenicheni ndi chikondi. Tiyeni tiphunzire kukonda ana athu chifukwa chakuti ndife ana athu!
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