Osati kuchita manyazi kuchita mantha?
Mutu wa mantha ndi njira za ana zolimbirana ndizovuta kwambiri kuposa momwe zimawonekera kwa akuluakulu. "Iwe uli kale mnyamata wamkulu, kodi sukuchita manyazi kuopa galu kakang'ono chotero (madzi, magalimoto, oyandikana nawo oyandikana nawo, ndi zina zotero)?" - Nthawi zambiri timanena kuti, kupukuta "mantha" a mwanayo. Kaya ndi mantha athu: thanzi la okondedwa, kusowa ndalama, bwana wamkulu, ndondomeko yosakwaniritsidwira ... Koma momwe mwana amachitira mantha ndi ubwino wake waunyamata ndi ubwana wake, njira zambiri zimadalira momwe adzakhalire wokondwa komanso wodalirika. Ndipo mu mphamvu ya makolo kuti amuthandize.
Kuda Nkhawa
Mantha amene amabwera chifukwa chowopsa, akatswiri a maganizo amachitcha "chikhalidwe". Ngati galu woweta abusa atamukira mwanayo, sizodabwitsa kuti anayamba kuopa agalu onse. Ndipo mantha otero ndi othandiza mosavuta kuwongolera maganizo.
Zowonjezereka kwambiri ndi zowonongeka ndizo zomwe zimatchedwa "zaumwini" mantha, zomwe zimakhala zosonyeza osati zakunja koma zochitika zamkati, moyo wa moyo. Ambiri ali ndi maziko ofunika: amawonekera nthawi zonse m'mwana aliyense pamene akukula, ngakhale kuti amasiyana. Nthawi zambiri amatchulidwa kuti "nkhaŵa zakukula". Poyamba, mwanayo amadziyanjanitsa ndi amayi ake, amamuona kuti ali mbali yake, koma kwa miyezi isanu ndi iwiri amayamba kumvetsa: amayi ake sali ake, iye ndi mbali ya dziko lalikulu lomwe kuli anthu ena. Ndipo pa nthawi imeneyo pamakhala mantha a alendo. Mukakumana ndi anthu atsopano, mayiyo ayenera kukumbukira mavuto a mwanayo ndipo asaumirire ngati mwanayo akana kukambirana ndi alendo. Makhalidwe ake pa iwo, amamanga pamaziko a amayi: ngati ali wokondwa kukumana, mwanayo amadziwa pang'ono kuti izi ndi "zake".
Monga nkhaŵa zina za chitukuko, mantha a alendo ndi ofunika komanso achilengedwe. Ngati mwanayo akuvutika ndi kulira, pokhapokha akawona munthu wakunja, - zingakhale zofunikira kuthandizira katswiri wamantha ndi njira zolimbana ndi ana. Koma chisangalalocho chimakhala m'manja mwa mlendo komanso sichizoloŵezi. Ngati mwana, osati kuyang'ana kumbuyo kwa amayi ake, amathamanga patali kuposa gulugufe kapena chinthu china chochititsa chidwi; ngati molimba mtima alowa m'madzi tsiku loyamba panyanja - khalidweli ndiloyenera kukambirana ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo. Titha kuganiza kuti njira yodzipatula isadutse, "wolimba mtima" samadzipatula ndi amayi ake ndipo samadandaula za chitetezo chake.
Ali ndi zaka khumi ndi zisanu ndi zinayi chaka chimodzi, khanda limayamba kuyendayenda pakhomo ndipo nthawi yomweyo amaika mayi (agogo ndi anyamata). Tsopano akudziwa mantha a kusungulumwa, kutayika kwa chinthu chokondedwa. "Ndikofunika kuti panthaŵi yotereyi pakhalepo ndipo angayankhe mwamsanga kuitana kwa mwanayo," anatero katswiri wa zamaganizo mwana, Anna Psychovkava. - Ndizoipa kwambiri kulanga kusungulumwa. Pamene amayi anga akunena kuti: "Ndatopa ndi iwe, pita kukagona mu chipinda china, koma iwe ukhazikika - udzabwera" - izi zimapangitsa nkhawa ya mwanayo.
Pafupifupi zaka 3 mpaka 4, komanso kudzidzimva kuti ndi olakwa, ana amayamba kuopa kuti adzalangidwa. Panthawiyi, amayesa zambiri ndi zinthu zosiyana, fufuzani
mwayi, kufufuza ubale wawo ndi dziko, makamaka ndi okondedwa awo. Anyamatawo akuti: "Ndikadzakula, ndimakwatira Amayi!"; ndipo atsikanawo akulengeza kuti adzasankha bambo awo kuti akhale amuna. Ntchito yonseyi yowopsya imakopa ndi kuwopseza nthawi yomweyo, chifukwa amaopa zotsatira zake. Malingana ndi Anna Kravtsova, mantha a ng'ona ya toothy ndizowopseza chilango chomwecho: ngati ndili ndi chidwi kwambiri ndikuyamba kufufuza zomwe ziri m'kamwa mwake, ng'ona idzaluma pa chala!
Osati anthu ozindikira kwambiri ayamba kuitanitsa ana a zaka 3 mpaka 4 osayenerera monga ulamuliro wa apolisi, ozimitsa moto, Babu Yaga komanso odutsa ("Ngati mukufuula, ndikupatsani kwa amalume awa!"). Katswiriyu anati: "Choncho, akuluakulu amachititsa kuti anawo asamade nkhaŵa nthawi yomweyo. "Sizitanthauza kuti chifukwa chake mwanayo ayamba kuchita mantha ndi apolisi kapena ozimitsa moto, komabe zikutheka kuti chiwerengero cha nkhawa chidzawonjezeka, ndipo mantha oyamba adzatchulidwa kwambiri. Kuyesera kutsitsa ana, kuti akwaniritse kumvera, ayenera kukumbukira nthawi zonse kuti kumvera ndi kudziimira, kudzidalira ndizosiyana. "
Imfa yochepa
Pafupifupi zaka zofanana, ana amayamba kuopa mdima pamene ali ndi mantha komanso njira zomwe angawathandize. "Kuopa mdima m'zaka zitatu ndi 4 zikufanana ndi kuopa imfa," Kravtsova akupitiriza. - Pazaka izi, ana amaganizira za momwe anthu angapitire kutali, kaya amabweranso nthawi zonse. Chidole chomwe chatha, chinthu chomwe chatha nthawi zonse, zonsezi zikusonyeza kuti ngakhale zomwezo zingachitikire anthu, kuphatikizapo okondedwa awo. " Kawirikawiri nthawi imeneyi mwanayo amayamba kufunsa mafunso okhudza imfa.
Ndipo ana ambiri omwe sali ndi vuto la kugona, amayamba kukhala capricious, amakana kugona, amafunsidwa kuti atsegule kuwala, kupereka madzi, - m'njira iliyonse kuchepetsa kupuma pantchito kuti agone. Ndipotu, kugona ndi imfa yaing'ono, nthawi imene sitidzilamulira. "Nanga bwanji ngati chinachake chikuchitikira achibale anga panthawiyi? Nanga bwanji ngati sindidzuka? "- mwanayo amamva choncho (sakuganiza, ndithudi).
N'zosatheka kumutsimikizira kuti imfa siipweteka. Munthu wamkulu komanso mwiniwake amaopa imfa, ndipo choopsa kwambiri kwa iye ndi imfa ya mwana wake. Choncho, pofuna kuthetseratu nkhawa za munthu wamng'ono, tifunika kukhazikitsa bata: tili pafupi, tili abwino ndi inu palimodzi, tikukondwera kukhala ndi moyo. "Tsopano tikuwerenga bukhuli, ndiye kuti nthano idzatha, ndipo iwe udzapita kuchidutswa" - awa ndi mawu abwino kwambiri kuti athetse mwanayo. "Kodi mukutsimikiza kuti mudzagona? Mwinamwake mukufuna zina? "- koma mawuwa amalimbikitsa nkhawa ya mwanayo. Kuopa mdima kungathe kuwonjezereka pa zaka zapakati pa 4 mpaka 5, chifukwa cha kukula kwa malingaliro, malingaliro opusa. Kuganizira za moyo wake wam'tsogolo komanso kuopa chilango chifukwa chazimenezi zimayambitsa zithunzi m'mabuku ndi mafilimu: Baba Yaga, Gray Wolf, Kashchei, komanso, nkhani zamantha zamakono, ochokera kwa "Harry Potter" ku Godzilla (ngati makolo amalola mwanayo kuti ayang'ane kanema wotere). Mwa njirayi, akatswiri ambiri amaganizo amavomereza kuti Baba-Yaga amaphatikizapo mtsogoleri wa amayi: akhoza kukhala okoma mtima, odyetsa, opatsa glomeruli pamsewu, koma angathenso, ngati chinachake sichili chake.
Kuteteza mwana ku nkhani zochititsa mantha ndi zopanda phindu komanso zovulaza. Amayi ambiri, powerenga nthano za ana, amachititsanso kuti mapeto athe kukhala bwino, ndipo mmbulu sunayambe kuyenda pa Little Red Riding Hood. Koma ana akufuula kuti: "Ayi, mudasokoneza chirichonse, palibe chomwecho!" "Tikufunikira mantha kuti tiphunzire momwe tingachitire," adatero Anna Kravtsova. - Kuwonjezera apo, nkhani zamatsenga zimakulolani kuti mubwezeretsenso mantha, kumvetsetsa kuti sizowona. Mu nkhani imodzi mmbulu ndi woipa, woipa, ndipo winanso amathandiza Ivan Tsarevich. "Harry Potter" ndi chitsanzo chabwino, chifukwa kupyolera mu zonsezi mutu wa kugonjetsa mantha anu ndi ulusi wofiira. Iye sanali yemwe sanawope, koma yemwe adatha kudzigonjetsa yekha.
Chinthu china - achikulire achikulire , okwera mfuti. Zimakhala zoopsa kwambiri, koma mwanayo sangathe kuyesa nkhaniyi payekha.
Komabe, mafilimu ndi nthano zimangokhala zojambula zokha, zimatha kusonkhanitsidwa kuchokera kulikonse, ngakhale kuchokera pachithunzi pamtundu. Chifukwa cha kuwonjezeka kwa nkhaŵa zachilengedwe ndizochitika m'banja. Kutsutsana kwa makolo kumakhala kovuta ndi mantha ambiri angapo: chiwonongeko cha dziko, kutayika kwa chinthu chokondedwa, kusungulumwa ndi chilango (zaka 3 mpaka 4 mwanayo amakhulupirira kuti makolo amakangana ndi kusudzulana chifukwa cha khalidwe lake loipa). Kuwonjezera pamenepo, nkhawa zaunyamata zimawonjezereka ndi lamulo lovuta la banja: malamulo okhwima, kulangidwa mwamphamvu, maximalism, kutsutsa ndi kukakamiza kwa makolo. Kugawanika kwa dziko lapansi molingana ndi mfundo ya "wakuda" - "woyera" kumamulimbikitsa mwana wa absoluteness ndi wosagonjetsedwa wa ziwanda kuchokera mu malingaliro ake ndi mantha ndi njira za ana kumenyana nawo.
Komabe, kukhala ndi malamulo opanda pake ndi kotheka. Ziri bwino kuti mwanayo akumva bwino m'dziko lopindula, lodziwika bwino komanso lokhazikika (mwachitsanzo, m'mawa amayi amadzimangira mu bafa kwa mphindi khumi, ndipo amakhala yekha, koma amayi samathamangira pakhomopo ngati amisala komanso osati akulira pamenepo kwa ora, zomwe zimawoneka ngati zamuyaya kwa mwana).
Kuyanjana ndi zitatu zosadziwika
Ndi malingaliro ndi malingaliro, pali mantha ena omwe amawopa - mantha a madzi. Pali nthano: ngati mantha a madzi atha pambuyo pa zochitika zina (zidumphika pamwamba pa nyanja, zimameza madzi mu dziwe la ana), ndiye izi siziri zaumunthu, koma mantha a chikhalidwe. Komabe, ana ambiri kuyambira pachiyambi amachiza madzi mosamala, ngakhale amayamba kusamba. Kupezeka kwa madzi ndiko kupezeka kwa maganizo, kukangana ndi zinthu zosadziwika. Ana akamayesa mozama kwambiri m'madera ena, makolo omvera amamulimbikitsa kuti aziphunzira zinthu zatsopano, zimakhala zosavuta kuti azitenga madzi ngati chinthu chochititsa chidwi, osati chowopsya.
Izi, mwa njira, zimakhudza akuluakulu. Timaopa zosadziwika (makamaka, otherworldly), koma pali anthu okondwa amene amachititsa zozizwitsa zosamvetsetseka ndi chidziwitso chokhazikika. Mwachionekere, iwo anali ndi ubusa wofufuza ana.
Makolo otchuka "Nikitin" amalola ana ake kuphunzira dziko lapansi pawokha: mwachitsanzo, iwo sankawasunga ana awo akamapita kumoto. Powotchedwa pang'ono ndi chisamaliro cha amayi ake, mwanayo amadziwa kale kuti "maluwa ofiira" sangayandikire. "Mungathe kuchita izi, koma muyenera kukumbukira bwinobwino," adatero Kravtsova. - Mayi nthawi zonse amadziwa mtundu wa mayesero "X" amalekerera mwanayo. Mwachitsanzo, iye ali kale wokhoza, wagwa ndipo atapukuta bondo, kuti awuke, kuwukankhira iwo, kuti awone, koma osati kulira. Amayi akhoza kuwonjezera pa "X" ndi "igruk": musagwiritse ntchito pamene akuyenda panjira yochepa. Atagwa, mwanayo amenya mphamvu, komabe mumamukhazika mtima pansi, koma iye, mwinamwake, adzaphunzira kusunga bwino, adzapitirizabe kudziwa za dziko. Koma ngati tiwonjezera "zet" ku chiyanjano ichi, zidzakhala zovuta kwambiri kwa mwanayo: kukambirana, kutentha kwakukulu, kupweteka maganizo kumapangitsa mwana kukhala cholengedwa chowopsya. "
Mzimu Wosangalatsa
Ngati zonse zili bwino m'banja, makolo amafunanso mozama komanso mwachikondi, mwanayo amatha kubwereranso ndikukumana ndi chidziwitso payekha, popanda kuthandizidwa ndi akulu. Zowopsa zina zikhoza kuwoneka mtsogolo, pamene mwanayo akukula, akuchulukitsidwa ndi mavuto a maganizo. Amayi ambiri, omwe akuvutika maganizo, ayamba kufufuza nthawi khumi ngati chitsulo chikuchotsedwa; ena amaopa kugona mu chipinda chopanda kanthu; ena amazunzika ndi zoopsa pambuyo poyang'ana zosangalatsa; winawake ndipo mpaka lero akuopa madzi. Kuopa kutayika chinthu chokondedwa (mwana, mwamuna) akhoza kutitengera ife misala, titengere khalidwe la chiopsezo. Komabe, nthawi zambiri izi zikuphulika, ndibwino kuti zikhazikike.
Choncho, nthawi zambiri, mantha salowerera kwambiri ndi mwanayo. Koma mungathe kumuthandiza kuthana nawo mofulumira. Makamaka akusowa thandizo la akulu, ngati alamu akupita kwa amatsenga. Ntchito yoyamba ndi yovuta kwambiri ndi kupeza zomwe kwenikweni mwanayo amawopa. Nthawi zina izi siziri zoonekeratu. Tsiku lina ndinakumana ndi mtsikana wina amene anauzidwa kuti ali ndi agalu, "anatero Anna Kravtsova. - Nthawi iliyonse m'mawa, mofulumira kuvala mwana wake kuti amutengere kwa namwino, mayi anga anamva kulira kwake kwa msungwanayo kuti: "Sindidzavala malaya!" Popeza galuyo anali atavala nsalu, mayi anga anafunsa kuti: "Kodi mukuopa agalu?" anavomera ndipo kuyambira nthawi imene chinachake chinalakwika, nthawi zonse ankafuula kuti: "Ndikuwopa agalu!" Ndipotu, anakana kuvala, chifukwa adadziwa kuti: mayi tsopano amutengera mwamsanga kwa namwino ndikuthawa tsiku lonse. Kutanthauzira kwa amayi osalungama kunayambitsa nthabwala yoopsa. "
Musanafunse mwana zomwe akuwopa, muyenera kuganizira ndi kumusunga. Kawirikawiri mantha amawonekera m'mawu - thupi lokha ndilo "limalankhula". Mwana wa zaka zisanu ndi zisanu (5) ali m'kalasi amayamba kudwala nthawi zonse chifukwa amaopa kupatukana ndi amayi ake. Wolemba woyamba sangayerekeze kuti m'mawa uliwonse amamva kupweteka m'mimba musanayambe sukulu kuopera chilango, mantha a "chisokonezo." Kuda nkhawa komweku kungawonetseke pooneka ngati ulesi: wophunzira wa sukulu akukana kuchita maphunziro ake yekha, pamodzi ndi amayi ake. Ndipotu, amangofuna kubisala, kugawana nawo udindo. Izi zimachitika kuti katswiri wa zamaganizo yekha amakhoza kuwulula chifukwa chenicheni. Koma ngati zapezeka kale, kapena kuyambira pachiyambi zinali zoonekeratu, ndiye njira yabwino yothetsera mantha ndiyo kusewera. Mu "Harry Potter" pali chidziwitso chomwe wophunzira aliyense wa sukulu zamatsenga Hogwarts anafika mmanja mwa bokosi lomwe linali ndi vuto lofunika kwambiri, ndipo linathekera kulimbana nalo, ndikuliwonetsa mosasamala. Mwachitsanzo, mphunzitsi woopsa kwambiri mnyamata wina atavala chipewa ndi zovala za agogo ake aakazi.
Mukhoza kuyang'ana pa mantha a zojambula, kujambula nkhani zozizwitsa zokhudza iwo, nkhani zamatsenga, ndakatulo. Mwana wa bwenzi langa m'kalasi yoyamba anali woopa kwambiri wophunzira wake - msungwana wamphamvu, wapamwamba kwambiri yemwe anamenya anyamata onse oyambirira. Anathandizidwa ndi nyimbo yolembedwa ndi bambo, pomwe panali mawu ambiri onyoza za mtsikanayo. Nthawi iliyonse, mnyamatayu ankaimba nyimboyo mobisa, akumwetulira, ndipo pang'onopang'ono mantha ake anatha.