Kuletsa mikangano ya m'banja mwamsanga

Ndani mwa ife samalota kuti akhale ndi banja losangalala komanso ubale wabwino? Mwatsoka,

luso lokhala pamodzi ndi kuthetsa kusamvana sikuphunzitsidwa kusukulu kapena ku yunivesite. M'mabanja, nthawi zambiri palibe amene angatenge chitsanzo - ubale wa makolo nthawi zambiri suli bwino. Choncho, achinyamata okwatirana amayenera kutsogoleredwa ndi mayesero ndi zolakwika: kuti akhale ndi chidziwitso m'banja, ndipo nthawi zambiri amasudzulana. Zoonadi, ziŵerengero zimatsimikizira kuti chiwerengero cha mabanja chimachepa chaka chilichonse, ndipo chiwerengero cha kusudzulana chikukula. Ndipo izi sizikuchitika kokha ku Russia, koma padziko lonse lapansi. Anthu achikulire amakwiya ndi kugwa kwa makhalidwe, "chikondi chaulere," maukwati ogonana omwewo: "Sitinaphunzitse ana athu chirichonse chomwecho!". Funso loyenera limabuka: "Ndipo mwatiphunzitsapo chiyani?". Chinthu chofunika kwambiri - ubale - sunaphunzitsidwe motsimikiza.
Ndi chiyani chapadera kwambiri podziwa komanso kudziwa momwe mungakhalire okondwa muukwati komanso mosamalitsa kusamvana m'banja? Chimwemwe cha ubale wokondwa ndi wamuyaya, maukwati a "moyo wamuyaya" amasonyeza kuti kuthekera kuyanjana kumathandizira kuthetsa mikangano m'banja. Kawirikawiri, mavuto amabuka m'mabanja omwe "machitidwe" a okwatirana sagawanika. Ndipo ndi kofunika kuti mumvetse bwino yemwe, chifukwa cha mayankho ati, momwe zinthu zimagwirira ntchito ndipo mavuto amachotsedwa. Choncho, m'mitundu yonse, kusamalira nyumba ndi kulera ana nthawi zonse zimakhala ngati kuti ndi mkazi wodalirika. Ntchito ndi "migodi," komanso maubwenzi ena onse - gawo la mwamuna wake. Aliyense ali ndi udindo pa malo ake ndipo samasokoneza ena popanda kusowa. Kuchita zinthu zina sikuletsedwa, koma china chirichonse chiyenera kuchitika, osati kuwononga "malo" ake. Mwachitsanzo, mkazi akhoza kugwira ntchito ngati atasiya nthawi yosamalidwa ndi kulera. Ngakhale mkazi atachita bizinesi, akupitirizabe kusamalira udindo wake. Ngati sakukwaniritsa ntchito zake payekha, ayenera kuwapanga iwo, mwachitsanzo, polemba ndalama za mwana, kupereka chakudya chokonzekera, ndi zina zotero. "Tug wa bulangeti" amayamba ngati sakudziwa okwatirana ndi ntchito zawo ndikuyesetsanso kuphunzitsana.
Ngati tiyesa kuphunzitsanso munthu, mmalo mogwira ntchito tokha, ndiye kuti timadziwika kuti ndife apamwamba kuposa ena. Ndipo ichi ndi njira yodzikonda komanso yodzikonda, chifukwa mbali zonsezi ndizofanana muukwati. Zikatero, ndizomveka kuti mudziwe nokha ndikumvetsetsa zofunikira. Kodi mtengo wofunika kwambiri kwa inu ndi uti? Kodi mumakonda kwambiri ndani? Kodi mukufuna chiyanjano chiani? Mikangano imabadwa chifukwa chosamvetsetsa chikondi ndi ziyembekezo zolakwika kuchokera m'banja. Egoism yaikulu ndikuyembekezerapo madalitso a m'banja. Aliyense ali ndi zoyembekezera zake, zomwe, monga lamulo, sizidzilungamitsa okha ndipo zimapangitsa mikangano yambiri yaukwati. Timafuna ndikufunanso kuchokera kwa chikondi ndi ulemu, komanso tikuiwala zosadzikonda kuti tidzipatse okha.
Sitikudziwa momwe tingakhalire achimwemwe, timadzikundikira mavuto, sitigwira ntchito pa makhalidwe athu oipa. Chinsinsi cha banja losangalala ndichopereka kwa wina, osati kufuna, kuona wina ndi mzake mikhalidwe yabwino ndi kuwayamikira, kuti athe kukhululukira zolakwa. Maubwenzi apabanja amafunikanso kuphunzira, kuwathandiza mwachikondi, osati kudzikonda, zomwe zingathandize kuthetsa mikangano ya m'banja. Mkwati uliwonse ukhoza kubwezeretsedwa ngati mutasiya kukayikira zoyenera posankha wokwatirana kapena mkazi, yambani kuzindikira banja lanu m'njira yatsopano - monga mtengo wapatali m'moyo.