Pofuna kuyankha funsoli, ukwati ukatha ubale wa nthawi yayitali - kaya umabweretsa chimwemwe, muyenera kudziwa zambiri zomwe zimakhudza ubalewu.
Choyamba, ndikofunika kudziwa zaka za anthu omwe adasankha kukwatira pambuyo pa chibwenzi chochepa. Ngati awa ali achinyamata, kapena ayi, achinyamata, ndiye kuti mwina, ukwati wotere sudzabweretsa chimwemwe. Chowonadi n'chakuti ali wamng'ono, mwinamwake, tonsefe timagwiritsa ntchito phokoso ndikuwona pinki. Zikuwoneka kuti chikondi choyamba chidzabweretsa chimwemwe chokha ndipo sipadzakhala cholakwika chilichonse. Koma, zowona, zotsatira za maubwenzi otero ndi osweka mitima ndi chidani kwa wina ndi mzake. Paunyamata, ukwatiwu umatiwoneka ngati wamatsenga komanso wodabwitsa. Pambuyo pa chochitika choterocho, payenera kukhala chisangalalo chonse ndi kumvetsetsa. Inde, mtsikana aliyense alota chimwemwe ndi chimwemwe. Koma, pa khumi ndi zisanu ndi zisanu ndi ziwiri-khumi ndi zisanu ndi ziwiri samvetsa kuti ukwati ndi udindo waukulu, kuyanjana nthawi zonse ndi moyo wa tsiku ndi tsiku. Pofuna kupeza nkhani, mtsikana amayamba kuchita zinthu mwachizoloŵezi. Inde, amakhumudwa. Pambuyo pa mabanja oterewa, anthu ambiri samakhulupirira kuti amakhala osangalala kwa nthawi yaitali ndipo amawopa maubwenzi aakulu. Izi ndizopangitsa kuti mabanja asakwatirane mukakhala pafupipafupi. Inde, pali zosiyana. Nthaŵi zina pali nzeru kwambiri osati zaka zambiri kumvetsa moyo wa banja. Amakondana osati mwa mwana, koma mwa njira yayikulu, kumvetsetsa udindo wawo womwe amadzipangira okha. Amuna awa, ngakhale pambuyo pa ubale wa nthawi yayitali. Dziwani bwino komanso mutha kupirira chizoloŵezi ndi chisokonezo chimene chimakhala chaka choyamba cha moyo wa banja.
Ali ndi zaka makumi awiri mphambu makumi atatu, anthu safulumira kukwatira. Chowonadi n'chakuti ngakhale atsikanawo akupitirizabe kulota, saonanso chilichonse mu pinki. Amaphunzira kuwerengera ndalama ndikuzindikira kuti ukwati ndi zokondweretsa zomwe mungakwanitse kamodzi kokha pamoyo wanu. Choncho, achinyamata amakhala nthawi zambiri m'mabanja aumunthu, amaphunzirana ndikusunga ndalama pa chikondwerero cha ukwati. Mafunso okhudza ubale wa nthawi yayitali ndi ukwati pa msinkhu uwu pafupifupi sudzawuka. Achinyamata amaona kuti chiopsezo chimenechi ndi chopusa komanso safuna kugulitsa zinthu zomwe zingagwe mofulumira.
Koma maukwati pambuyo pa chibwenzi chimangokhala kanthawi kochepa, amakumanabe. Ndipo izi zimachitika pakati pa anthu a m'badwo wolemekezeka kwambiri. Nchifukwa chiyani iwo amachita izi ndipo nchiyani chomwe chimawapangitsa iwo kuthana ndi mantha awo omwe anali mu zaka makumi awiri? Ndipotu nthawi zambiri anthu oterewa amakwatirana nthawi yoyamba. Iwo ali ndi zowawa zowawa za ubale ndipo amaphunzira kuzindikira zolaula pang'onopang'ono. Ngati, pokhala aang'ono kwambiri, tikuwona zabwino zokhazokha, ndiyeno timayamba kuchita chirichonse chokayika, ndiye pambuyo pa makumi atatu kale pali nzeru za moyo. Pa msinkhu uwu, mkazi nthawi yomweyo amadziwa momwe munthu alili woona mtima. Kuonjezerapo, zofunika patsogolo zimasintha. Kuwoneka ndi mawonekedwe akufalikira kumbuyo. Zofunikira ndizo zikhulupiliro, kupirira, kulimba. Pambuyo pa anthu makumi atatu omwe akanakhoza kuchita chinachake, anali atachita kale izo. Choncho, amayi safunikira kuganiza kuti izi zimalonjeza bwanji kapena munthuyo. Zolinga zake zonse zimasonyezedwa phindu, ntchito ndi moyo. Amayiwo nthawi yomweyo amawona ngati kuli koyenera kulankhulana ndi munthu wotere kapena ngati nthawi zonse adzakhala wojambula womasuka yemwe aliyense ayenera kupeza zambiri pa moyo ndikudyetsa osati yekhayo komanso iye.
Pamene zaka za anthu zoposa makumi atatu, iwo safunikanso zochitika zazing'ono. Mwinamwake, iwo anali ndi malo oti akhale nawo mu miyoyo yawo, koma iwo sanabweretse chimwemwe. Choncho, sitampu ya pasipoti kwa anthu oterewa ndikutsimikizira kuti amakondana wina ndi mzake, ndipo palibe.
Anthu a msinkhu uwu amakwatirana mwamsanga ndi zifukwa zingapo. Mwachitsanzo, achinyamata nthawi zonse amayang'ana maganizo awo ndi malingaliro awo, koma kodi ndi chikondi chenicheni kapena ndikoyenera kuyang'ana? Iwo omwe ali oposa makumi atatu, musafunefune chikondi. Amafuna kuthandizidwa komanso kumvetsetsa. Mu awiri awiriwa, simungathe kuona kupsyinjika ndi kukhudzidwa. M'malo mwake, amuna ndi akazi amakambirana momasuka, koma ndi mantha ndi ulemu. Izi sizosadabwitsa, chifukwa zochitika pamoyo zimapangitsa kupeŵa mikangano yambiri, kupeza zosamalidwa ndi kusapanga zolakwika ndi popanda chifukwa. Choncho, pokomana ndi kuzindikira kuti, ali oyenerana wina ndi mzake, anthu otere samakoka ndi kulembetsa ukwati. Nthawi zina amakonza zikondwerero, ndipo nthawi zina amangolemba ndi kuyamba kukhala pamodzi. Pankhaniyi, chovala choyera ndi zochitika sizinali zofunika. Mkwatibwi wotero ndi amodzi amphamvu kwambiri, chifukwa anthu samakanikirana. Amayamikira kwambiri mwayi umenewo ndipo amachita mwamsangamsanga atakumana. Mkwatibwi woteroyo, ngakhale pambuyo pang'onopang'ono maubwenzi asanakwatirane, amabweretsa chimwemwe.
Zoona, pali gulu limodzi la anthu. Mwachidziwikire, awa ndi akazi omwe sangathe kukwatirana kwa nthawi yaitali ndipo akufulumira kulemba maubwenzi ndi aliyense. Izi, nayenso, sizidzadikira nthawi yaitali, ndipo padzakhala mpata uli wonse womwe ungapangitse sucheno mu registrar. Koma, maukwati oterewa samakhala osangalala nthaŵi zonse. Zoona zake n'zakuti, amayi, nthawi zambiri, amalumphira kukwatira munthu woyamba, osamvetsetsa zomwe ali. Chifukwa chake, akazi oterewa amakhala ndi banja losasangalala ndi osakhulupirika, akumwa kapena akuyenda. Pano amayi oterewa ayenera kulangiza pazomwe zilizonse kuti asamafulumire kukwatira, chifukwa m'malo mwa chimwemwe mungathe kulira misozi ndi kupweteka.