Iwe uli ndi wokongola, wanzeru, wokongola ndi wosudzulana! Ndipo simukudziwa ngati muli ndi chisoni chifukwa cha mkhalidwe uno kapena kusangalala, chifukwa munthu wosudzulana angatchedwe wapadera. N'chifukwa chiyani wapadera? Munthu wotere m'mapewa ake kale "ali ndi" mwamuna wake wakale, katundu wambiri, zizoloŵezi ndi chidziwitso. Pachifukwa ichi, funso limabwera: "Kodi ukwati ndi munthu wosiyidwa uli ndi tsogolo?". Tidzakuuzani za zamoyo zomwe zilipo pansi pa madzi zomwe zimatha kulankhulana ndi munthu wotere, komanso momwe mungakhalire ndi munthu wosudzulana.
Ngati ndinu mwamuna wokongola kwambiri, mumakhulupirira kuti munthu wotereyo ndi wabwino kuposa munthu wosadziwa, mukufuna kutenga mwayi, kenaka chitanipo kanthu! Koma musanayambe kuchita, funsani zovuta zonse ndi ubwino wa ubale ndi munthu wosudzulana.
Ubwino
Choyamba ndikuti iye ndi mfulu, amenenso ali ndi chidziwitso chamtengo wapatali mu maubwenzi aakulu. Mwamuna wotero pa mgwirizano watsopano amadziwa bwino, monga amamvetsetsa molondola ndikudziŵa udindo womwe amadzipangira yekha.
Kawirikawiri, amuna omwe amatha kusudzulana amawatsimikizira mwamtheradi amayi onse omwe amakumana naye pambuyo pa chisudzulo, choncho pindulani ndi izi ndikukhala bwino kuposa mkazi wake wakale. Amadziwikanso kuti amuna osudzulana ndi amwano, gwiritsani ntchito izi.
Kuipa
Kuyankhulana ndi mwamuna wosudzulana monga mwa mawu a akatswiri a maganizo amatha kugwirizanitsidwa ndi kuyenda kudutsa m'minda yam'mimba - ngakhale kulakwitsa kochepa kungapangitse kupuma. Osati mwamuna aliyense pambuyo pa banja loyamba lolephera lidzasankha pa banja lachiwiri, kotero musayembekezere kuti apereka mwamsanga dzanja lake ndi mtima wake. Pankhaniyi, mufunikira kudziwa ndi kuleza mtima, zomwe zingakuthandizeni kulankhula naye.
Mwamuna amene wasudzulana nthawi zambiri amayerekezera mkazi wamakono ndi mkazi wake, kuti: "Koma borsch anakonza Ira mosiyana," "Ndipo Sveta anatsuka masokosi anga ndi mathalauza ndi shati," "Tanya nthawi zonse ankandilola kukhala ndi anzanga ndi kumwa mowa." Khalani okonzeka kufananitsa kotero, osati kuganiza kuti iye adzathetsa ubwenzi wake ndi mkazi wake wakale kosatha. Malingana ndi chiwerengero, kotala la amuna atatha kusudzulana mkati mwa miyezi 18, kuponyera wokondedwa watsopano, kubwerera ku banja.
Momwe mungakhalire ndi munthu wosudzulana
Kodi mukufuna kuyamba chibwenzi ndi kuganizira za ukwati wokhazikika ndi munthu amene wasudzulana ndipo nthawi yomweyo kukhala wosangalala kwambiri? Kenaka tisonkhanitsani zowonjezera zambiri zokhudzana ndi izo. Izi zimaonedwa kuti ndizofunikira kwambiri, popeza zomwe zidziwitse zidzakuuzani mtundu wa munthu. Koma musalowe mu moyo wake, kukumba m'mbuyo mwake, kufunsa gulu la mafunso osiyana, kambiranani ndi anzanu.
Phunzirani mabwenzi ake, mutha kuphunzira zambiri za kusankha kwanu. Mukhozanso kumvetsera zomwe abwenzi ake akunena za iye. Yang'anirani momwe amalankhulira za mkazi wake wakale, momwe amachitira naye tsopano, momwe ubale wake ndi ana, momwe amalankhulira nawo. Kusonkhanitsa mfundo zing'onozing'ono palimodzi, mukhoza kupanga chithunzi cha osankhidwawo.
Kotero inu mukhoza kuchita osati kokha ngati mutasankha kumanga ubale ndi mwamuna wosudzulana, koma mu ubale uliwonse. Komabe, mu nkhani iyi muli ndi chitsanzo chofotokozera momwe munthu uyu adakhalira muukwati.
Kawirikawiri, akazi amakhulupirira kuti ngati mwamuna amachitira zoipa za mkazi wake wakale ndi / kapena kumuzunza ndikukuuzani zachindunji, ndiye izi sizikutanthauza chilichonse. Awa ndi malingaliro olakwika, kotero musayembekezere kuti izo zidzakhala zosiyana ndi inu. Nthawi zambiri munthu amakhalabe yemweyo.
Mfundo yofunikira ndi chifukwa cha chisudzulo, kaya zinali zovuta mu chiyanjano, ndipo sanafune kapena kulimbana kuti asunge ubalewo. Ngati ndi choncho, ndiye kuti pali chitsimikizo chotani chomwe chikukumana ndi mavuto mu ubale wanu, iye adzamenyera ubale wanu?
Pali zosiyana ndi zosiyana, koma pazifukwazi muli ndi limodzi - muli ndi mwayi wowona khalidwe la mwamuna musanalowe m'banja, kuyerekezani ndi khalidwe lake pambuyo paukwati ndikuganiza.
Kumanga ubale, nkofunika kuzindikira bwino kuti kuti mupambane munthu waulere muyenera kupambana mtima wake, koma kugonjetsa munthu wosudzulana, muyenera kumenyana naye kale, zomwe zikuphatikizapo njira yonseyi.
Koma ngati mutsimikiza kuti uyu ndiye munthu amene mumamufuna, ndiye mutipatse ndi malangizo athu ndikugonjetsa osankhidwa anu!