Ngati mumakhudzidwa ndi funso la momwe mungamuthandizire munthu wanu, muyenera choyamba kudziwa chomwe chimayambitsa vuto lake. Kuti mumuchotse mdziko lino, muyenera kumudziwa bwino ndi kumvetsetsa zomwe zingamukhudze bwino, ndipo zomwe zingayambitse kuwonongeka. Kaŵirikaŵiri zimachitika kuti asungwana, poyesera kumuchotsa munthuyo, amamuipitsa. Choncho, poyamba, sikoyenera kutengera ngati mkhalidwe wa zochitika pamoyo wanu. Kumbukirani kuti mnyamata akhoza kukhala ndi mavuto osiyana komanso kusiyana kwake kwa maganizo. Choncho, ngati mumvetsetsa kuti simungathe kumuchotsa payekha, chifukwa simukuwona mzu wa vutoli, ndi bwino kutembenukira kwa katswiri. Katswiri yekha amatha kuchoka ku zinthu zoipa kuti asawononge psyche. Koma panopa tikukamba za vuto lalikulu. Musaiwale kuti kupanikizika ndi matenda okhudzana ndi kuphwanya mu psyche yaumunthu. Ndipo pano tikukamba zambiri za momwe tingathandizire munthu yemwe wakhala wosakhutira kukhala ndi moyo. Monga lamulo, matendawa ndi ovuta kwambiri kuposa odwala.
Choncho, poyambira, ndikofunika kudziwa zizindikiro zazikulu za matendawa. Izi zikuphatikizapo:
- kukhumba ndi chisoni;
- Kusagona, kusowa tulo kwa nthawi yaitali;
- kusowa kwathunthu chakudya ndi kugonana;
- kudzimva kuti ndi wolakwa komanso wodzichepetsa;
- kutopa nthawi zonse;
- kumutu ndi ululu m'dera la mtima;
- kambiranani za kudzipha.
Ngati muwona zizindikiro zonsezi pa khalidwe la wokondedwa wanu, muyenera kuonana ndi katswiri, ngakhale munthuyo atakana. Izi ndizochitika zenizeni ndipo inu nokha simungathe kuzilingalira. Kuwonjezera pamenepo, kudziyimira payekha kungapangitse zotsatira zopanda malire. Ngati mzimayi ali wokhumudwa komanso akunena kuti moyo suli wokondweretsa, koma safuna kudzipha yekha, nthawi zambiri amadya ndipo samadandaula za thanzi - ndiye thandizo lanu ndiloyenera.
Choncho, choyamba, tidzatha kudziwa zomwe zingakhale vutoli. Kawirikawiri, achinyamata amavutika chifukwa chosowa kukwaniritsa zolinga zawo. Tavomerezana, tonse panthawi ina tinalota za chinachake, koma kenaka tinazindikira kuti m'dziko lamakono zili zovuta kwambiri kuzindikira. Winawake anaziwona mosavuta, koma kwa wina ndizovuta kuvomereza zenizeni, koma samakhulupirira kuti akhoza kusintha izo bwino. Mwinamwake, mnyamata wanu ali ndi vuto limeneli. Kuti mukhazikitse, muyenera kumutsimikizira munthuyo kuti akhoza kukwaniritsa chinachake. Kuti muchite izi, muyenera kumulimbikitsa kuti akwaniritse zofuna zazing'ono. Mwachitsanzo, wachinyamata ali ndi maloto oti akhale mlembi wotchuka, wasayansi kapena woimba, koma samadzizindikira yekha chifukwa cha zinthu zosiyanasiyana. Pankhaniyi, m'pofunika kuti maloto ake akhale chinthu chokondweretsa, chimene sangathe kuti apeze phindu, koma chifukwa cha zokondweretsa zake. Mu mzinda uliwonse pali magulu osiyanasiyana pa zofuna. Pemphani munthuyo kuti apite ku umodzi wa iwo. Aloleni alankhule ndi anthu omwe ali ndi matalente ofanana, adzakhala mu bwalo la iwo akumumvetsa. Kotero, iye adzakhala ndi kumverera kuti iyemwini ali wokondweretsa kwa gulu lapakati la anthu, ndipo kotero si chirichonse chomwe chatayika ndipo iwe ukhoza kupitirira. Kuonjezerapo, pamene okonda maluso amasonkhana palimodzi, pamodzi amayesetsa kukwaniritsa zomwe samakhulupirira zokha.
Komanso, mnyamata angayambe kuchita nawo zochitika zamasewera, zomwe zidzakhala zosangalatsa kwambiri. Zitha kukhala chirichonse: bungwe la kondomu ya wokonda wopikisana, amatsanzira pa masewera osiyanasiyana a kompyuta kapena pakompyuta ndi zambiri, zambiri. Chinthu chachikulu ndi chakuti inu mumathandizanso pazinthu izi, munasonyeza chidwi ndikuchirikiza zoyambira zake zonse. Mukhoza kulenga zinthu pamodzi, kubwera ndi malingaliro ndi njira zowonjezera.
Kuti munthu asavutike, m'pofunika kumupulumutsa ku moyo wautali ndi wosasangalatsa. Muyenera kuonetsetsa kuti tsiku lililonse ndi latsopano komanso lapadera. Mutha kupita kumzinda wina, kukonzekera kukwera m'mapiri ndi anzanu kapena kungoyenda kuzungulira mzinda kuti mutsegule malo atsopano. Ntchito yanu yaikulu sikuti mumupange mnyamata, koma kuti mumusangalatse. Ndicho chifukwa chake ndi kofunikira kudziwa zonse zomwe amakonda komanso zomwe amakonda. Choyamba, muyenera kusankha chomwe chidzamusangalatsa, osati inu. Simusowa kuti mukhale okhudzidwa ndi zofuna zanu, ndipo makamaka musamayikane ndi munthu yemwe akuopsezedwa ndi amatsenga. Ngati muchita izi, ndiye kuti, mwachidziwikiratu, amangozisiya kapena mumakangana. Kotero musati mulole, koma perekani malingaliro osiyana. Ngati mwalenga, posachedwa amayamba kumukonda, ndipo mutatha chiganizo chotsatira mutalandira chilolezo kuchokera kwa mnyamata wanu. Chinthu chachikulu ndikuti musasiye nthawi yomweyo ndikudziuza nokha kuti simungamuthandize pa chilichonse. Yesetsani kuti muzitha kupirira bwino matenda ake, koma panthawi imodzimodziyo, muzimukumbutsa kuti ndi wochenjera komanso wabwino, akuthandizira mawu omwe ali ndi nkhani kuchokera pa moyo wake omwe angapezeke. Ngati inu nokha mukukhulupirira kuti chibwenzi chanu chingapindulitse chinachake, posachedwa iye mwini adzazindikira choonadi ichi.